Patreon, R&P Q&A #204: Week 5

Online dating is about having good text game and setting up the in person meet within the week. Make it sexual, but subtextual. Girls get aggressive dudes requesting nudes, sending dick picks, looking to hook up right away, etc. This is what a guy would love from OLD: girls are not men. Not to say it doesn't happen, but I would be wary of chicks being overly sexual on OLD. Especially, if they are getting up there in age. In my experience these are women who can are dysfunctional and only know how to get attention with their sexuality or weaponize their sexuality. Fun to play with, but not much more. Also don't waste your time with pen pals. Tried it in the past, adding more attention and comfort and it never really leads anywhere.

FR 2023 Feb 02 DATING APPS Still working on some calibration, looking to get compliance from girls before getting the number. Point of this? To see if they’re willing to follow my lead and get them somewhat invested. For example a girl says she “likes to laugh” we match and I open with “I see you like to laugh shoot me your best dad joke” I’m too tired to think, you go or anything besides compliance probably leads to a future flake. I had one girl basically not comply with anything I asked. She said she had long day so I replied “Like tell me about your day in voice note” she ignored and just said “Hey” 2 days later. I went for the number and she said she wants to stay talking here, I was about to unmatch her but I remember a guy in MEN that would say “let me know when you get over that” and few days later girls would hit him up. She unmarched me which is fine which I was going to do it to her anyway. However I keep going over the scenario in my head of what I could have said better. I’ll says this is a feature and not a bug. Move forward with some more R&D and trying things. I probably save myself from a what was a time waster for validation. I had two other matches and got the phone number for one. Phone number girl lives in FL, Latina and curvy. Sent some videos when I asked for a picture not in her profile unprompted. Been having some nice text game but would like to escalate for nudes before I go take a fligh. We have been somewhat sexual but nothing graphic. I got a year pass for unlimited flights for $800 from frontier so staring in May so I will probably flying around the US to get laid and visit places I’ve never been to. Girl #2 didn’t give me her number but she wants to do a video call through the app later so I’m totally cool with that. She’s local young and white so I’m looking forward to that, going to get a hair cut before calling her. PLATE #1 & Calibration Getting better at amused mastery. She tried to complain about not seeing her enough and said sarcastically “what a miracle you decided to come by and stay the night” I just replied “Oh were you praying or something?” Silence, then she busted out laughing. Got the “I love how you play with me sometimes”. Told me her daughter got pregnant and I said wow cool, I never banged a grandmother before. Didn’t think it was funny but then I just grabbed her and squeezed her tits. Later she tried to bring up how I was probably seeing other girls over the weekend and I just “uh huh” through that. She asked “why aren’t you answering me?” Silence. She said “I’m learning so much from you” in a question tone. I gave her weird look and she laid on my chest. She made me a giant plate of food and I ate it all(only meal of the day). Needless to say I was super full but she was horny. She wanted me to smash right after and I kept telling her I was full. I was trying to watch a movie to let the food sit and was finding it hard to keep my cool. She was fidgety , pulling me in for random kissing and talking a lot. It was like a kid that couldn’t sit still. Finally had the urge to hit the toilet and came back to take care of business all of a sudden she was into the movie and we were laughing together. Any advice on what to do in these situations to keep calm? I don’t want to reprimand good behavior but it wasn’t the right time and I don’t like the fact that “I wanted to tell her to STFU and let me watch the movie” HYPONOSIS Follow-UP It may sound wowoo but I do have a feeling of optimism in my life after doing some of these. Like real change in my life will begin. I know It just won’t happen I have to enforce new habits. I think what self Hypnosis has helped is facing fear. When you face it, well, it’s not so bad. This is what I’m afraid of??!! So I tried to do a bit more Self Hypnosis and it gave me idea and courage look into my hoarding disorder. Been looking into and it begins at about age 14 and at my age it’s fully set in. I understand now the psychology behind buying things for a hoarder. I buy shit I don’t need because it’s a good deal and I will have remorse at not taking the deal, so that’s why I have 5 tape measurers. Another is taking as much free shit at a convention as possible like notepads, pens and shirts, I have had them for years, but I took most of them to my office we opened the driving school. However, I will not be taking anymore to my house. Working in AV events I found myself looking for free shit, now I can stop myself from taking 5 goody bags that were left behind. I can work through that FOMO and Just leaving them there. Just last night I was able to get rid of at least 1 cardboard box that had been in my living room for months. it’s a small step but will be trying to replicate that process and finally clean out my apartment. HEALTH Got the MRI results and I have 4 bulging disks from the accident, 2 in the neck and to in the lower spine. Waiting to get the MRI in the mid back. Left shoulder pain and left jaw tightness were things that showed up recently. Been fasting and feel a bit better about my weight but haven’t had the balls to get back on the scale. Skipped a few days of going for walks. It’s like I’m substituting my walks for fasting and vice versa when I should be doing both.

JPa (Asking for A Friend)

I think you're playing this correctly. You're right that you are not going to find your life destiny in an ayahuasca trip. People mostly use this a flex and/oir a desire to be guided by a higher purpose. It's people rationalizing big life decisions as destiny rather than their limbic brain self interest. This is astrology for men. I feel bad for chicks. Their emotions rule and ruin their lives. Had her brain told her to put in this effort during the relationship, life would be great for her. The constant dissatisfaction that hypergamy plants into their heads is a curse. I think most cultures sort of had that understanding and the sexual revolution has tried to get past it, but they can't. It's a great feature for the species but terrible for the individual.

Dave

FR2 *username change from Eric to EricTheRed. Reading - Praxeology Volume 1 : Frame Lifting - high rep burpees and pull-ups Diet - dirty bulking during vacation… Going to try my best to write this from my perspective and what I did, and keep it to the point. On Friday I brought the family (including ex) on a Mexico vacation. We booked this last summer before we were separated and still wanted to go for the kids. For some reason the ex has this idea in her head that we’re going to come out of this vacation together, and back to normal. I just keep laughing this off because I honestly think it’s a fucking joke that she still thinks this, after all the conversations we’ve had, I thought I was pretty clear that I gave a lot of chances and we’re done now. I went to see a shaman on Sunday. I had been looking forward to this for months, thinking I would finally find some answers or direction in my life. It was definitely a let down, but I guess I got my answer. If I want anything in life there are no shortcuts and the only person who can give me answers is me. I’m done dishing out money to life coaches, therapists, shamans, etc. I have the everything I need, I just need to put in the work myself, no easy fixes. I realized this trip that the past six months of separation have made me very independent, which is obviously opposite of who I used to be. For most of the trip I find myself leading or doing my own thing, with the kids, and the ex just tags along. I don’t give into her constant advances of hand holding and bullshit, I’m just not interested in that anymore, maybe I’m cold, maybe I’m angry, maybe I just hate her, I don’t know. I’ve been very aloof with the ex. I set a boundary before we left that I won’t be talking about relationship stuff and just want to have fun. Every time she’s brought it up, I’ve either shot it down or walked away. I’ve just been having fun with my kids and being my new independent self, but for some reason this is attracting her like crazy. We’ve been fucking multiple times a day, did it in the ocean, even a bj in the shower and I finished in her mouth. For some reason the more I tell her how things are over or act independent the sluttier she gets. I know I shouldn’t complain about the sluttiness, but her neediness and lack of direction is a huge turn off. Tomorrow we fly back to Canada, it’s been a very odd vacation, but I had fun. I know next week is going to be tough, but it’s time to move forward.

ErikTheRed