Gif: THE MAN WHO BECAME HIS OWN MISTRESS

I discovered the magic word by accident. If I said it I'd transform into a gorgeous blonde woman, and if I said it backwards I'd change back into myself. I was always just a regular guy, I wasn't really into girly stuff or anything. But being a girl, seeing that pretty face in the mirror... I gotta admit, it felt good. Too good.

Of course I couldn't tell my wife about it, so I started going on a lot of "business trips." I'd book a room in some cheap hotel a few counties over, then I'd settle in, say my magic word and spend the night trying on lingerie and making kissy faces at myself in the mirror. I told myself it was harmless, just a fun little secret. But it felt like the weirdest affair ever, as if I were my own mistress.

And then one night I went out to a club, and after a few hours of drinking and dancing I ended up going home with a man. I felt awful after I changed back, and I swore I'd never let myself do it again... but my stupid girl body wanted men, it craved their touch. I loved feeling little in their strong arms, the scrape of their stubble against my soft skin. It all felt so good, so right... I couldn't stop myself.

Tonight I came to the hotel, and on a whim I tried something new. I said my magic word once, watching myself change in the mirror, and then I said it a second time. I changed again, my shape warping in new ways, my curves becoming more exaggerated. Then I said the word again, and again. Each time it pushed me further, my hips flaring, my chest swelling, my brain buzzing with a growing need. I became something new, my most secret self exposed, for all the world to see.

I'll admit it was thrilling for a moment, but then I came to my senses and I couldn't wait to change back. I'd taken my little game way too far, I'd learned things about myself I didn't want to know, and now I really was through. I was going to throw out my hot pink lipsticks and my lacy bras, go home to my poor little wife and start all over. I was ready to put all this madness behind me.

So I looked in the mirror, said the magic word backwards... and nothing happened. I tried again and again. And again.

That was hours ago. That strange girl is still there in the hotel mirror, her soft cheeks flushed pink and her long eyelashes glittering with tears. She keeps moaning some nonsense word over and over, as if it means anything at all.