The Weekend Visit, Part 37

I still couldn’t believe it. 

Though I couldn’t exactly deny it, either. With every step back to our table, it was as if the diapers were sagging heavier, persistently reminding me of what I had just done. At an upscale restaurant, less than 60 seconds away from the bathroom door, with my sister right there as a witness. 

There was the immediate humiliation, both from Kate’s judgment as well as her decision about how long I would be wearing diapers moving forward. And then there was everything to come. Like how I had to keep the disgusting padding on through the end of dinner, plus the drive home. According to Kate, I already had a bit of a diaper rash; I was nervous about making that worse, even if sitting at a table wouldn’t be as bad as walking around the mall. I would just have to avoid fidgeting, which had the added benefit of not drawing any unwanted attention to myself. 

Apparently Kate was thinking similarly. As we stepped back into the dining room, hand in hand, she said, “Remember to smile, little sis. You don’t want anyone thinking something’s up, do you?”

I just shook my head. She didn’t even need to use her leverage or push the usual quota. Now that it was so established that I was her younger sister, acting any differently would be a problem. Even Aunt Miranda, who knew the truth, seemed to occasionally forget that this wasn’t just some ‘experiment’ that Kate and I were doing. 

As always, sitting down for the first time after such an accident was the worst thing ever. Doing my best to hide the grimace on my face and maintain the awkward smile that I was getting better at maintaining, I did my best to fade into the background while counting down the minutes. I was definitely the odd girl out. Kate and the twins had become a same-aged trio, and had connected so quickly despite how we hadn’t seen them in forever. Of course, that was the whole point of us visiting this weekend. Our aunt and uncle were the only two adults at the table. I was the only ‘tween,’ both in personality and appearance, and the current state of my underwear made me feel even more self conscious about everything. 

When we arrived, Uncle Rob was talking about his latest work project. It didn’t take long for Kate to become the center of attention. She started talking about where she’d be going to college at the end of summer; the state school wasn’t particularly prestigious, and she also had no idea what her major was going to be. Our uncle suggested that business was always a safe option, since it worked across a variety of fields after undergrad. He even mentioned that he’d probably be able to get her a job after graduation, though he would only be able to get her foot in the door. After that, it’d be up to her to prove herself and rise through the ranks. 

That sounded about right. Kate scoring a job with a single interview, getting to live in the same city as her two new BFFs. Not that she was that close with our cousins after a single day, but still. Also, there was no telling where Luna and Lilah would be after college. I was just bitterly projecting since I was the only one at the table who had actually landed on a major and was doing well in all my classes compared to my sister’s general disinterest in school. 

Instead, I had to pretend like I was years younger when the spotlight was finally on me. “Umm, I like math. And, like, science?” Honestly, I couldn’t even remember the specific classes I took back when I was in middle school. Algebra, maybe? As for science, all I could think of was biology/chemistry/physics from high school. All I knew was that I preferred those two broad subjects compared to history and english pretty much all throughout my teenage years. 

“Are you involved in any extracurriculars?” he asked.

Wait, did our uncle even know?! He was speaking to me just as naturally as he had been conversing with Kate, though I found it difficult to believe that he had forgotten which sister was the older one. And even if he somehow mixed up our names, she and I were less than two years apart in age. Either way, I wasn’t nearly as young as I currently looked. “Yeah, I’m like, in orchestra?” I had played violin throughout my middle school years, though that was more of a class than an after school activity. 

Kate’s lips were pursed in an amused smile, which I assumed was because of how I was playing along with barely any hesitation. I didn’t realize at the time that it was actually due to the way I was ending most of my sentences with an immature uptick. That wasn’t something she had told me to do; it just ended up happening due to how there was a hint of a question in pretty much everything I said. It was one thing to pretend to be younger in the moment, but leaning on my past to create a false present was not that easy. 

I did my best to respond to the string of questions about the school I hadn’t attended in over five years, during which Kate made up a BFF and a boy I had a crush on. ‘Gemma’ and ‘Brayden.’ Honestly, I was grateful I didn’t actually know anybody who went by either of those two names, as that would only make things more confusing. On top of the overlapping truths and lies, my underwear situation was making it difficult enough to focus.

The silver lining of being a ‘tween’ was that I was less mature by default due to my false age. Between the filler words and the nervous giggling, it didn’t take long before the questions shifted towards Luna and Lilah. They were more than happy to chatter away, bouncing off each other about today’s mall trip. True to their word, they kept their mouths shut about my little secret. 

Halfway through the meal, Kate leaned over and murmured, “Annie, I want you to fall out of your chair. You’re a total klutz, remember?”