Brewing Bad Ch. 186-187

Ch. 186 - Everyone’s Invited

In that moment, all Lucas wanted was to find somewhere quiet so that he could be alone with his new wife, but he wasn’t given that option. They managed to hold hands for a little while, but after only a few waves of well-wishers, they were separated by the crowd as different people came to pay their respects to both of them. Sometimes they were reunited, but more often they were separated as Lucas was barraged with handshakes and pats on the back by an infinite variety of guests. 

Some of them were friends, others worked for him, and passed them there were the locals. Before they ever even reached town, where they had the food and the band set up, he was nearly smothered by the attention. 

Once they got there, though, he was seated with his new wife at the head table, which had been put on a small platform to give it a commanding view of all the other guests. “It feels like we’re royalty,” she said nervously, squeezing his hand under the table. 

“For the day we are,” Lucas agreed. “But even though I turn back into a pumpkin tomorrow, you’ll stay my queen forever.”

“Awww,” she whispered, trying and failing not to blush too fiercely in front of everyone she knew. 

They’d only just gotten comfortable and been served their first glass of wine by one of his messengers who had been retasked as waiters for the day, when the speeches started. Lucas had tried to minimize this part, but it was apparently a part of local tradition, and the people would not be denied. 

So, as they sat there, speaker after speaker came up to sing their praises. In Danaira’s case, that praise was universal. No matter who spoke, be it a member of another noble house or the village baker, they had nothing negative to say about her. Though Lucas enjoyed those speeches on their own, he enjoyed the way she squeezed his hand as she looked like she was about to crawl into a hole and die even more. 

Still, he didn’t go unscathed. Plenty of people said their piece about him as well. Those speeches were a bit more mixed. Some of them contained a few caveats about him being a "diamond in the rough” or “turning out okay in the end.” Those sorts of speeches mostly came from the locals who were just glad he made Danaria happy. 

The people who worked for, with, or around him tended to deliver a few words that were more veiled or ribald. Lucas was never outright insulted, but those who spoke well of him tended to roast him more than celebrate him, and soon enough, he wanted to join Danaria in that hole she was so keen to dig. 

They were only spared this cruel fate when the talking stopped and the dancing started. There, at least, Lucas was finally glad he’d practiced such a useless skill so much. Whirling his bride around the complicated patterns that were required of such things wasn’t easy, but the fact that there were uneven cobbles beneath their feet instead of polished hardwood floors made it all that much harder. 

He barely noticed the difficulty, though. Instead, he just noticed the way she smiled as he held her lithe form effortlessly. Though it felt like half the time they were dancing with other people as the rounds required, each time she returned to him, he couldn’t help but tell her how beautiful she was.

“Stop!” she said breathlessly. “People will hear!”

“I hope they do,” Lucas murmured, kissing her again. “I hope everyone hears.”

While they didn’t quite continue until exhaustion, they continued until the main course was ready, which was about the same time. By the time it was ready to move the tables to the center of the square, the sun was getting close to the horizon, and the two of them returned to their table and began to feast in earnest. Lucas had spent most of the rest of his share on this party, and he’d be damned if he wasn’t going to enjoy it. He had a little of everything that was brought around. He tried every dish, and sipped every beer and wine, though he was careful not to let himself get too drunk. The last thing he wanted to do was spoil the night that lay ahead. 

While the party started well before sundown, the light quickly faded. Even before the sunset was gone, though, the crowded square was illuminated with more than a hundred little paper lanterns that lit the festivities. People continued to drink and feast. They continued to dance without any interruption, and Lucas was sure that the party would continue on well into the night.

He was conflicted, of course. He was having a great time, but he was also looking forward to being alone with his beloved. Still, he was in no hurry and only stepped away to take a leak after one too many toasts.

On his way back, though, he paused to take in the whole scene. It was beautiful. He’d seen Meadowin a thousand times before, but never like this, and it made him wish he had a camera to take a picture of it. While he was admiring the scene, someone short approached him out of the corner of his eye. At first, Lucas thought that it was a child; lord knew that everyone had come out of the woodwork tonight to offer him their congratulations. 

As they approached, though, he realized it was a man, and for an instant, he worried that whoever they were, they might be an assassin, but a familiar voice quickly diffused the situation. 

“As nice as this is, I still don’t think it truly competes with the magic of alchemy,” Heisenburgle said, revealing himself. 

It was a real surprise. After his letter, Lucas hadn’t been expecting him, but when he took off his wide-brimmed hat to reveal a familiar head full of wispy white hair, Lucas recognized him immediately. 

“Well, look who decided to show up. Hei—” he started to say. 

“Not so loud,” the gnome hissed. “As far as anyone knows, I’m still locked away in my water laboratory until sunrise, and not to be disturbed.”

Lucas didn’t see the need for secrecy, given that both the Prince and the head of the Whisperers were dead, but he opted to humor the gnome, if only because he’d come all this way. 

“Well, I appreciate you coming regardless of whatever name and albeit you’ve assumed for the evening,” Lucas said, offering the man his hand.  

“We can’t be too careful, not in times like these,” the gnome insisted as he shook it. “Someone has brought the kingdom inches from revolution…”

“Not my problem,” Lucas said. “I’m pretty much out of the game now. I just want a quiet life and a beautiful wife. Maybe an inn with a decent taco menu. It’s not so much to ask.”

“As nice as that sounds, I doubt that’s in the cards for you… for either of us, for that matter,” the gnome chuckled. As he did so, he reached into his dark coat and pulled out a small wrapped box. 

“What’s this?” Lucas asked. Looking at the small wrapped package. His first guess would have been reagents or potions, but no matter how much he concentrated on it to try to pull off one last surprise identification, no popups appeared. 

“Just a trifle really,” the gnome answered. “Nothing that you didn’t earn. It’s just your share of Skylara’s treasure, or at least the deed to it.”

Lucas had been about to make a joke about how the horde was a hell of a lot smaller than either of them thought, but the gnome robbed him of his thunder, so instead he just said, “I thought you buried it with tons of stone.”

“I did,” the gnome agreed. “It will not see the light of day for years, I expect. It’s safer that way, until the kingdom is settled from all of the turmoil you caused. Still, an initial assay was done by my men. They went by volume rather than any more detailed count, but based upon their observations, and my calculations… well, it’s an impressive number.”

We caused, Lucas added mentally, looking at the number written on the form. It was too large for him to take in properly. It was like one of those bank errors you saw in movies, and he couldn’t do the mental math to figure out if he was a millionaire, a billionaire, or perhaps a trillionaire. All three seemed equally likely.

“Still, even if you can’t collect your share now, should you need to, I’m sure you can borrow against it,” the gnome added while Lucas was still counting zeros. 

“Isn’t this… won’t this belong to the king or the council or whoever takes charge?” Lucas asked finally, unsure what else to say. If he really got even half this amount, he never needed to work again if he didn’t want to. Neither would his children or grandchildren. 

The thought of children made him look around for Danaria. He instantly found her sitting at the high table, but before he could do anything but smile at her, Heisenburgle stole his attention a second time. 

“When the council forms, they can well do what they want, I suppose, but the law on salvage is twenty percent, and they are unlikely to change that,” he noted. “I wouldn’t worry about them moving too quickly, anyway, the hyperinflationary impact of Skylara’s horde will be a headache for anyone—”

“This is only 20%?” Lucas gasped, looking at the giant number again.

“No, that is only ten percent,” the gnome answered pedantically. “I get the other ten, and after I’ve paid my men from the sales of the dragon hide and blood, and restocked my—”

“Ten per…” Lucas almost shouted before he repeated a second time in more hushed tones. “Ten percent?!”

“Indeed,” Heisenburgle said smugly. “It’s probably enough to make you the richest person in the Kingdom, besides me, of course.”

Lucas felt faint, but before he could comment further, or worse, thank the man, Heisenburgle added, “It’s barely even a gift. It’s yours, really, but we can talk more about it in a less crowded setting. Now come, light your fireworks, I want to see how your recipe works before I retreat to Blackgate.”

“Of course I… How did you know I made fireworks?” Lucas asked, taken off guard. 

He thought such insight would be evidence of the man’s new talent, but Heisenburgle just smiled and said, “What kind of alchemist would get married and not make fireworks?”

Lucas laughed at that and nodded. Then he and Heisenburgle walked over to the tubes, and after Lucas got everyone’s attention, and let them know that they’d soon be showing them the second most beautiful sight of the evening, they got to work. 

One at a time, each tube was lit, and as it did so, a wave of tiny explosions launched little clay balls into the air that were packed with more powder and metal filings. Lucas and Heisenburgle barely looked up at the sky after the first few as everyone else oohed and ahhed, but quickly returned to the conversation. The show was for everyone else; they were here for the chemistry.  

“Good power,” the gnome nodded. “Excellent height and spread, but the colors could use some work.”

Lucas had intentionally chosen a muted palette of reds, pinks, and whites rather than adding blues or greens, given the occasion. Adding blues or greens would have been the easiest thing in the world, but he didn’t bother to explain that to the gnome, since aesthetics and romance were well beyond him. 

Instead, between explosions, Lucas discussed the difficulty he’d had in obtaining good-quality sulfur. It was a fine conversation, and almost enough to make him miss his time with Heisenburgle. Still, eventually, toward the end of the show, the gnome announced that he would depart soon. 

“I didn’t know he was a wizard!” one of the young children said excitedly nearby, just loud enough for Lucas to hear him. He smiled at that, too. He felt like a wizard, but even as he finished lighting the last tube and said his goodbyes to Heisenburgle, he was already heading back to Danaria, because the real magic was found by her side. 

Ch. 187 - Finally Alone

It was closer to midnight than sunset by the time Lucas and his bridge finally escaped the crowds. Half of the guests had gone home to sleep by then, but as long as booze held out, it seemed likely that the party would go on. No one tried to stop them, but the only one who went with them was Mort. His carriage driver, turned valet, went ahead of them with a lantern to make sure that the newlyweds found their way through the home that was still only halfway built. 

The basement lab was roughed in, but it was still weeks away from being brought online. Normally, that would have excited Lucas, but tonight he had other priorities. 

He and Danaria managed to keep their hands off each other until they threaded their way through the construction site to the only finished room in the entire building. It was lit by three dim oil lamps, which provided just enough light to show off the bed that stood there in the stark, white washed room. It wasn’t fancy, but in time when it had other furniture, it would be more than cozy. For now, all the two of them needed was the bed. 

When they reached it, Mort tried to reassure them both that they were perfectly safe. “We have guards posted around the back and—”

“Yeah, I’m sure you got it covered,” Lucas agreed, practically shutting the door on the young man. “Maybe not too close, though, right?”

Then, suddenly, at last, they were alone. He turned to smile at Danaria and ask her how she was doing, but he couldn’t. As soon as he opened his mouth, she was kissing him with a hunger that he completely understood. 

For several minutes, there was no talking. There was only touching and tasting as he pinned her to the wall of their new home and let his hands wander across her body. While they’d made out before, it was never with this intensity, and the only reason they got undressed as slowly as they did was because Lucas held himself back. The last thing he wanted to do was rip her dress.

A piece at a time, their clothes came off, and by the time Lucas had his wife down to her underwear, she was so shy that she’d practically frozen like a deer in the headlights. “You’ve got nothing to hide,” he whispered as he bore he down to the bed. 

“No one’s ever seen me with so little on…” she said. It wasn’t quite a plea to stop, but it was enough to make him pause.

“And no one besides me ever will,” he agreed, tracing a line from where she covered her lacy white bra with one arm to where she covered her thin panties with the other. “And I got to tell you, it's a real privilege. It’s like someone opened an art gallery, or built a cathedral all for me…”

As lines went, it was lame, but a lot of the clever things he might have said that occurred to him in the moment used too much Earth slang and would have derailed the conversation entirely. Still, she didn’t seem to mind. She wanted to be appreciated, and after a few seconds, she moved her hands, letting him see everything, well, almost everything. He was only a couple of thin pieces of fabric away from seeing the rest, but as much as he hungered to, he waited to see Danaria’s reaction. 

“You’re going to… we’re going to make love,” she whispered. 

“We are,” he agreed. “It’s going to be amazing.”

“I’m sure,” she sighed, “But what if…” Her words trailed off. 

“There’s nothing to be afraid of,” he said, kissing her again as he felt her tremble beneath him. “You’ll like what comes next.”

“I… ” she paused, almost unable to say what she was thinking, “what if your seed takes root? What if we have a child?”

He paused as he tried to really understand her concern. In the world that he was used to, sex was more for recreation than procreation, and thinking about the two as inherently linked felt strange to him. There was magic that handled that sort of thing, of course, but Lucas didn’t bring it up. 

He didn’t bring up the Lwynthenll he’d made for the occasion either. While he’d made it in case they wanted to make the night really special, he’d decided against using it well before this moment. He knew better than anyone that drugs made poor foundations for a lasting relationship, and he doubted that the nonaddictive sort would do much better than the sort he’d been hooked on back on Earth.

He thought about reassuring her that they didn’t have to bang now if she didn’t want to. Instead, he opted not to worry about it. “If we get pregnant, well, then we’ll have something else to celebrate, won’t we?” he said, answering her question with a question of his own.

That was apparently the right answer, and as he spoke, her nervous smile brightened noticeably as she released his hand. That was how people had lived their lives for thousands of years; either they’d have a baby or they wouldn’t.

I’m too young to be a dad, he thought, not daring to speak the words as he lifted her negligee and reached for his wife’s panties. They weren’t really true anyway. 

The truth was he wanted this woman for far more than sex. If that had ever been the main reason to get close to her, then it was a long time ago. While he wanted to explore every inch of her body, that was only a small part of their connection now, and he watched her face for the subtle signals of pleasure and pain as he took her for the first time.

. . .

Whatever doubts Danaria might have had evaporated with her first orgasm. While they started out slow and took a nap somewhere after midnight before the second and third rounds, by the end of the night, he’d woken up something insatiable in his lover, and he was okay with that.

While he wasn’t sure if she was pregnant yet, he was pretty sure she would be before the first month was out. He hadn’t fucked like this since high school, and suddenly he’d found another use for the superhuman endurance he’d used to beat the ice troll and Skylara. 

Maybe that’s what I should make, he told himself as he listened to Danaira snore softly beside him. 

He considered it for a moment before he decided against it. Nah, I already have two little blue potions. The world doesn’t need any more of those. 

What did the world need more of, though? That was the question. Despite fucking for hours, he was energized now. The realization that he was married, and soon he’d be a father, mixed with the knowledge that he was pointlessly, hideously wealthy, and his mind was racing. What was he supposed to do next? Build an alchemical plant? Run for president? Just try not to get himself in any more trouble?

Lucas lay there restlessly, but eventually got up and put on his pants to go outside so as not to disturb Danaria’s slumber. If I do, she’s going to want to go another round, and that might actually kill me. 

Outside, false dawn colored the horizon, and though the music had stopped, a few lanterns were still lit in the village square. Lucas stood there for several minutes trying to put all of this into some sort of perspective. Then, the sound of footsteps made him whirl to face the house. 

At first, he thought it might be an assassin, or worse, a guard. He quickly saw it was the silhouette of a naked woman, though. No, not a naked woman, he realized. A dryad. 

The woman was busty enough that he knew it couldn’t be his Danaria, almost from the first moment, but beyond that, he couldn’t say. For one terrible moment, he feared that Skylara had come back from the grave to rip all of this away from him. Then he recognized the blossom on the head of the plant woman, and a few moments later, when she stepped out of the shadow of the tree she’d been under, he saw her green skin. 

“I understand that congratulations are in order,” she purred, making no attempt to conceal her nudity nor her sexuality. On any other day, his gaze might have wavered as he looked her up and down, but not today. Today, he’d seen a beauty that even the most erotic forest spirit couldn’t hope to match, and he met her gaze evenly. 

“What are you doing here?” Lucas asked. “This isn’t the Prince’s love nest, and whatever you’re selling, I’m not buying it.”

“Though I do owe you a debt for killing my master, that is not the reason I’ve come,” she agreed. “We aren’t here to talk about my debt. We’re here to talk about yours.”

“Mine? I don’t owe you anything,” Lucas answered with a shake of his head. 

He wanted to believe that he was dreaming. This felt like a dream, but the air was just chill enough that he knew it wasn’t. Still, even as he racked his inebriated, lust-addled brain, he couldn’t think of what she was getting at. 

“Look, I don’t know what kind of game you’re playing, but I never touched…” he lowered his tone. The last thing he wanted to do was wake up Danaria to find him arguing with a naked dryad in their back garden. “I never touched any woman in that little prison, so if you think you can shake me down…”

“This is not a tawdry scheme or a mortal debt to be easily discharged,” she responded as his words finally coasted to a stop. “I come with tidings from Lwyn herself.”

“Fuck…” Lucas blurted out, unable to suppress his misgivings as things finally started to fall together in his mind. 

The forest nymph smiled wickedly at that. “Indeed. Though you did not avail yourself of the pleasures I might have offered you before, she has still bid me congratulate you on your union, your slaying of Skylara, as well as your first steps toward godhood. As she said, ‘to think those angels called you unimportant. You’ve been a very busy boy.”

As the nymph repeated the goddess's words, she did it in the goddess’s voice, which Lucas found more than a little disconcerting. He opened his mouth to respond, but the dryad continued. “However, none of those are the reason she asked me to pay you a visit on this night, of all nights. She asked me to remind you of the favor you owe her, which would come due only after the dragoness was no more.”

Lucas nodded. He knew that was coming from the moment Lwyn’s name had been invoked. While that unnamed favor was enough for him to hope Skylara had lived another thousand years, after she tried to roast Danaria, that outcome was never in the cards. 

“What does she want?” Lucas asked, not bothering to try to get out of it. There obviously wasn’t a point. 

“Sometime in the next decade, when the Great horde hears the news, the Khrall’koh’thon, the Breaker of Cities, will bring his endless hordes south to feast upon the defenseless region,” she explained. “When that happens, you are to slay him and break his army, defeating them so soundly that they never rise again.”

“That’s all?” Lucas laughed. “Who needs a whole decade to solve that?”

“She will be pleased to hear of your confidence,” the dryad teased. “While it might be up to a decade from now, it could be as little as two or three years.”

Lucas swallowed hard at that. “Noted,” he said finally. “Does she have any advice on the subject?”

The dryad smiled cruelly and pretended to think for a moment before she answered once more in the voice of the Goddess, “I’d recommend you take over control of the city to marshal its resources first, but given that you intentionally tossed away those options so recently… Well, that could complicate things, but I’m not concerned. You’re a very clever man, Lucas Parin, and one day, if you survive, you may be a very clever god, too. Don’t disappoint me, I’m looking forward to it.”

While he stood there processing those words, the dryad turned and left without a word. When she approached the tree, she vanished inside of it, as if it contained an invisible door marked, ‘plant spirits only, keep out.’

Then, he was alone with his thoughts. While his peace wasn’t exactly shattered, he certainly felt it ripple uneasily around him. Still, some part of him was glad he no longer lived in mystery, and the other shoe had dropped. As he tried to figure out exactly what he should do about any of it, though, he heard the house door open behind him. This time, the silhouette of a woman in a robe didn’t frighten him; after tonight, he knew her shape too well.

“Is everything okay, Lucas?” Danaria asked.

“Never better,” he answered immediately. It wasn’t even a lie. He really had never felt better in his life than he did tonight. 

“I thought I heard you talking to someone,” Danria said, looking at him sleepily. “Was there a woman back here with you?”

“The only woman here is you,” he said with a smile. Part of him wanted to tell her about Lwyn’s task. “Now let's go back inside before you catch cold.”

While part of him wanted nothing more than to be completely honest with her, the rest of him didn’t want to ruin this peaceful moment. So, he decided that complete honesty could wait until at least tomorrow. For that matter, so could his worrying about it. 

As he went back in with his beautiful bride, he firmly pushed thoughts of mischievous goddesses, dragon hoards, orc hordes, and anything else he could think of right out of his mind. Tonight belonged to his wife, and no matter who popped out of the woodwork, that wouldn’t change, not even for the Goddess Lwyn herself.

The End

And that, ladies and gentlemen is the end of this story. As I mentioned before, I think I probablly have to write a second trilogy about Lucas' journey. He finished the first leg, and found a home and happiness, but there are a few rather large threads left for us to weave something new together.

I welcome your thoughts, though! Please give me any feedback you feel is warrents on the ending/final book/whole series. I plan to start rewriting book 1 before the end of the year, and one that and my Letter of the Law rewrite are done, I will likely pick this story back up from this point, without much in the way of a time lapse.