realistic_lighting_overhaul

Second stream done! 3 hours! I feel proud of myself.

Hi everyone!

I have started streaming at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCTW0W0FSNTxQzeiiArNc74g

I would be a great help if you guys could like the videos and maybe subscribe.

Its a return to streaming after 5 years and it's been f...

Ironing out sound issues for stream + massive migraine.

So the test stream was helpful in figuring out what was broken. 

I have fixed my quiet audio which was mostly panning to the right ear for viewers. Raffy (my son) helped fix other issues. My brother Joe has helped me with an AI program he has to auto generate thumbnails cause I am horrible at that. 

We still have no idea wh...

Test stream done!

It was awful but it was just to test settings!

It's a start!

Stream setup at 99% - Might start tomorrow...

So my son and I have setup my stream, its mostly done. At about 99%.

I could do a trial run tonight, seeing how I feel but I'm very light headed.

Tomorrow it's almost a certainty.

As stated before, I will try to stream 2-4 hours a night, try to have some fun and if all goes well I could earn enough to pay for my dinner the next...

Positive update...

So in the last two days I have been back at it trying to shake off my social anxiety by playing Lethal Company and making some friends.

It's been quite a few years since I played multiplayer games and having a laugh with random people. It actually brings joy to me once I shake off those fears.

Met a couple of cool guys and in the com...

Streaming for food...

Yes you read that right.

My son is helping me setup my channel again this week which means after 5 long years I will return to streaming games.

I will literally be streaming as a way to pass time, cope with stress, meet new people but honestly, hoping for about $20-25 a day (eventually) to purely pay for my food. 

My main ...

14 weeks...

Hi everyone,

So I have added up all the funds people have donated and calculated that on a very tight budget, I can survive in my current home for 14 weeks.

I am also in the process of trying to get a job purely from home, but that might take a few to pan out.

I have also found a part-time gig writing some guides but its only $...

Essentials purchased for the next month.

Thank you so much, your donations and patrons have helped me secure all my essentials (toilet paper, soaps, wipes, etc) for the next 4 weeks.

If Patrons remain at the current rate, and with the donations received, I should be safe for the next 3 months on a very tight budget.

I can't thank you all enough for this.

Next step is ...

Medical Certificate Granted + Massive BPD episodes.

I was granted a medical certificate for the next 3 months due to my ongoing health issues.

I also feel very sorry for the people in my life dealing with this.

Mainly my son Raffy, my brother Joe and my girlfriend Olivia.

I suffer from BPD and this ongoing fear of losing my home, losing everything I have, is making me push back ...

A return to streaming despite health issues.

I have come to the decision to get back to streaming soon. I am a bit worried about fainting on stream or having low energy but I feel like I should stream at least 4 to 8 hours a day as though it was a job.

My goal is to earn just $25 per day streaming full time. If I can make $125-150 a week with donations while streaming, it would help ...

Thanks again to all the patrons who have joined!

I want to thank all the new patrons and those who upped their pledges.

Please give me a week or two to update the RLO mod with all your names. I just have a lot on my plate and once things settle, I might do something nice and permanent on my mod to always mark the names of those who helped me get through this horrible time.

The help...

What the actual f***

I volunteered to have an appointment with Octec to see if I can look for work that suits my disability.

I have no work obligations to do until the 9th of November, but I decided to ask them for help.

NO ONE CALLED ME and despite them knowing I can't travel, they just upped and blocked my payments at 4:30pm right at closing time.

Housing application made.

Hopefully I can be accepted so I can avoid being homeless.

This might be a lengthy process, so I hope the support I have received can sustain me until then.

I AM SO STRESSED. 

It didn't go well with my social worker.

Just read the email.

What a load of bullshit.

I already did the process she is asking me to do in 2020. Now they want me to do it all again. She has all my medical records. I spoke to my doctor and they told me they sent her all the info back in January 2023. She said she tried to call me (I got no call). She said she tried to make a...

Calls with social workers and also housing today.

Wish me luck.

So far the first two meetings with these people haven't really gone anywhere.

They seemed promising but so far a whole week has gone by and nothing concrete has happened. They have applied for my disability, but this should have been done by One Door Mental Health 11 months ago.

I have no idea why in a year they d...

Proof that rent was paid.

Yes my bank account looks bad right now. I haven't withdrawn the patreon money or the gofundme yet. There is $610 in gofundme and $400 in patreon.

I have $500 in Paypal.

This means I have $1382 after I have paid off the $600+ overdrawn in my account.

Rent is $400 a week. My bills are $165 a week. I spend about $100 a week on fo...

OMG so many new patrons! Rent was paid!

God there are so many new patrons that I am getting confused to who I have thanked.

I want to thank you all as a collective to make things easier on my brain.

I feel a bit overwhelmed. Thank you so much.

I have paid my rent on time!

This means I am safe for the next two weeks.

Thank you so much

Welcome to the new members! Thank you.

Welcome Tom Free, Spook Tacular, deedlez349 and Blackread!

Thanks so much for joining and helping out.

I also want to add that it might take me a bit longer than usual to update all the names on the mod for those who have that tier.

Theres been a lot of changes with tiers and I haven't had much energy in me to go to the mod sit...

Karma round 1 has struck.

My ex wifes boyfriend (who lives with my children) has been arrested.

Family services took my children away because of my disability and put them in a home with convicted criminals.

Karma has now struck. Proof that they made a mistake, and what happened to me is discrimination. 

I will fight for what is right. I have nothi...

A quick thank you

Thanks to the people who have upped their pledges and donated to the gofundme.

We have raised about $340 this week, and that is almost an extra weeks rent for me. 

Two people donated $15 each and that paid for my food so far. 

Thank you so much. I am in tears seeing the gofundme getting donations.

I am already s...

GoFundMe

My girlfriend has setup a GoFundMe page for me.

Please share it around, even if you can't donate to the cause.

https://gofund.me/6694711b

If anyone wants proof of these issues, please feel free to ask and I will show whatever screenshots to help. 

I w...

My life is over...homelessness looming.

This is just me getting things off my chest.

I am not in the best mindset and sorry if this is a rant. 

The 9th of November will result in a change of my life.

I have been fighting financial problems for many years now, being a single parent and having 7 different illnesses. I battled so hard but the world is a cruel place...

Getting old...birthday on Friday.

Well I am getting old...

Hasn't been the best of years but I am grateful for what I have.

I plan to have lunch with my children on Friday and then head off to see my parents. I haven't seen them in a few years. Both my parents were in hospital recently for covid. They have since recovered.

I don't live far but I just don't trav...

Cardiologist results are in...

So the results are in and its given me some mixed feelings.

Trying to remain positive but theres more tests to come.

Structurally wise, my angiogram showed no heart disease. All my arteries were squeaky clean, despite my past history of smok...

Heart results with cardiologist this Monday

So this Monday I am off to the cardiologist after a month or so worth of intense tests and monitoring.

I really hope they can figure out this fainting issue. 

During this time I kept a log of every incident that happened, my diet and other personal things (like going to the bathroom lol). 

I have noticed a pattern wit...

CT Angiogram was not fun...

I had my CT angiogram and it wasn't fun.

Let's just say the catheter into an artery was the least of the scary stuff.

They had to do the scan THREE TIMES, so 3x the radiation and 3x the iodine dye. 

Every time they did the injection, it made me feel like I was on fire. They said it was normal. but jesus - not a fun feeling...

More updates...

Just a quick update, I am off to get a CT Angiogram on Tuesday 5th of September.

I am still on my 4 week heart monitor. 

Had a rough day a couple of days ago, with racing heart and almost passing out. Yesterday was a better/calmer day.

Today fingers crossed, has been relaxing and uneventful. 

Hope everyone is do...

Health update

Just a quick update that I finally saw the cardiologist at the clinic. It was a week later than expected because I wasn't well enough to travel last week.

I had an ecg, heart echo and a treadmill stress test. 

I will need to book in a CT angiogram to check my arteries and then a 4 week long heart monitor to check the rhythm of m...

A little update

Well on the 21st I am off to a cardiology clinic to follow up on some findings when I was in hospital.

Apparently I had an "episode of SVT, with low qrs voltage in precordial leads".

I am not sure how long I will stay in the clinic but its been urgent cause my fainting episodes are getting really bad. I am at a point where I can't ev...

Welcome Kami Shahi!!

Thanks so much for joining! You will get your name on my mod page as a supporter!