Scraps - It's Been Awhile...

AN: This one goes between chapters 16 & 17 of Blitz, so there's a minor spoiler alert for y'all. I can't say that it's gonna spoil the actual story of Blitz at all, but that is where it's intended to go in order to fit into the events happening in Blitz, so read at your own discretion with that in mind. Quick shout out to Laust Rasmussen for reminding me that I needed to write this after chapter seventeen went live. I had completely forgotten about it until you made that comment, so thanks for kicking me into gear, Laust. Hope this answers all the questions that I didn't go into before and I hope all of you enjoy.

*

The situation had been on Rebecca’s mind all night and yet, she had been able to maintain the same good natured smile and sarcastic demeanor that was expected of her the entire time she was at Harvey’s. It was simple when there was a distraction as loud as Evie or a target as easy as Trent to divert her attention and allow her to have a good time, but it didn’t last forever. As soon as the two of them parted ways with Rebecca, leaving her by herself in the uptight bar, her face had instantly fallen as her mind spiraled into the thoughts that had been pestering to take over since she decided to go through with it.

Sara… Fuck… Rebecca thought to herself before shaking her head and pushing a hand through her thick, dark brown locks. When was the last time I even saw her? Right after I graduated? Before then? I can’t even remember… 

Rebecca sipped at the half full beer she had been nursing since Evie and Trent had left and breathed out a sigh. She probably doesn’t want to see me. I wasn’t the best sister by any means. In fact, I was downright awful to her most days. Still…

Still, Rebecca knew that there had been at least fifteen years since she had seen her youngest sibling and if anything, time healed old wounds. It was a lesson she learned with her wife, Emily, and through the example of countless others around her. Why would it be any different with Sara? She asked herself.

The longer the tall brunette sat and pondered about it, the more restless she got. It was almost an itchy feeling under her skin that she couldn’t shake off no matter how hard she tried. It got to her so much so that she couldn’t even bear to finish her drink -- her third beer of the night -- before she was getting up to pay the tab she promised Trent she would cover and heading out of the stuffy, stuck up bar.

The chilly night air seemed to clear her head some when she stepped out into it. It may have just been a nice distraction, with the way that it nipped at her nose with a frosty breeze, but Rebecca counted herself lucky nonetheless. Thinking about everything was only making her more restless and uneasy. Soon she was sure to abandon the entire idea of going over to reconcile with her long lost sister and then she would be left kicking herself over the what ifs.

Rebecca had put herself through such scenarios so many times before, that she unconsciously sneered at the concept of leaving herself with the dreaded what ifs for the rest of her life and instead got in her car and steeled herself for what came next.

It was a silent drive from Harvey’s to the cute, quaint little house that Sara lived in. With her husband and children most likely. Rebecca reminded herself as she narrowed her eyes at the white wood paneling of the house. She’s probably married now. Not just a little kid with big hollywood dreams anymore. Rebecca turned her face from Sara’s humble abode to look to her lap before letting her face fall forward onto the steering wheel. God, this is weird… 

Rebecca sat in that awkward position for minutes, just running through her thoughts, before she picked her face up with a heaving sigh, and flung open the door of her sedan. Just gotta take each step one at a time. She instructed herself as she got out of the car and took a final glance at the house before approaching it. That’s good. Now just go up the steps, knock on the door and- The front door flew open before Rebecca could even raise her hand to knock and a second later she was face to face with her little sister, Sara. 

It’s like it was yesterday… Rebecca mused as her eyes scanned the shorter woman in front of her. She still wears her hair long and that dusting of freckles over her nose hasn’t changed a bit. Still the same old Sara, simple and beautiful as ever. A smile, warm and unthinking, sprawled across Rebecca’s face as she took in the features of her younger sibling and it was quickly mirrored by Sara. 

“Hi, Winnie,” Sara whispered, just loud enough for Rebecca to hear. 

Rebecca’s brows crinkled upwards at that old, forgotten nickname. “Sar Bear,” Rebecca began before she cleared her throat, choking off the emotion that dared to rise up her throat. “Look at you. You’re all grown up.”

Sara laughed and nodded, her own eyes welling up with tears despite Rebecca’s reservation. “And you’re a sight for sore eyes.” Before Rebecca could do or say anything else, Sara flung herself into Rebecca’s arms and buried her head in the tall brunette’s chest. “I missed you,” she breathed.

“That’s impossible,” Rebecca muttered and shook her head against the top of Sara’s head, her own tears coming to the surface against her will. “I’ve never given you any reason to miss me.”

Sara pulled back from her older sister with a stern look and grabbed Rebecca by the face with both hands. “You’re my only sister. Of course, I’ve missed you.”

Rebecca searched her sister’s brown eyes, so much like her own and smiled. “I’ve missed you too, kid,” she said and rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly.

The two of them stared at each other with soft smiles, just taking in the other’s presence, before the sound of heavy thudding feet interrupted them. “Babe? Everything alright?” a deep, mellow voice rang out somewhere behind Sara, causing her to turn and look with a growing grin.

“Yeah, Josh. Everything’s great,” Sara called back over her shoulder. “Why don’t you come here?”

“Your husband?” Rebecca asked Sara with a cock of her brow.

“Mm-hm. Come and meet him,” Sara nodded and grabbed at the sleeves of her sweater before pulling Rebecca into the foyer.

A tall, lanky man with cinnamon colored skin and sandy locks of messy surfer hair appeared behind Sara a moment later. He cocked his head in inquiry, like a confused puppy and stared at Rebecca for a long, lingering moment. Long enough to get her to lift her chin in adversity and stare the man down with intense eyes -- the Rebecca Knox version of squirming in her seat, really. 

“Wow, you do look a lot alike, don’t ya?” he asked with an impressed whistle and a nod. “Bit darker in the hair and eyes for you,” he said with a motion of his head toward Rebecca, “but almost identical besides that. What a trip.”

Rebecca laughed at this analysis. “Good genes, I guess,” she remarked with a shrug and held her hand out to the lanky man. “You must be Josh. So nice to meet you.”

He pulled his expression into a tight, stony face that was turned to his wife, before an exasperated sigh left him. “Why are you like this?” he asked and shook his head.

Sara giggled and held her hands up in a gesture of, ‘I don’t know,’ before an even louder batch of chuckles shook through her. “I don’t think about it!”

“Did I say something?” Rebecca asked cautiously, her eyes going from the amused face of Sara to the frustrated one her husband wore.

“No,” Sara replied and shook her head as the giggles began to taper off. “He just hates it when I introduce him as Josh.”

“Um…” Rebecca uttered, her brows pulling together in confusion.

“Jackson,” the man said and finally took Rebecca’s outstretched hand in a firm grip. “My name is Jackson.”

“Oh!” Rebecca said and pumped the hand gripping hers twice. “Why did she call you Josh then?”

“An old inside joke,” Jackson said with a sigh and glanced at Sara with a deliberate side eyed gaze before shaking his head in disappointment. “You’ll have to forgive my wife, she thinks she’s funny.” He dropped Rebecca’s hand with a shrug. “I don’t have the heart to tell her she’s not.”

“Hey!” Sara exclaimed and slapped Jackson’s shoulder with the back of her hand. “I heard that.”

Jackson lifted a hand to his mouth and leaned closer to Rebecca with a conspiratorial whisper. “See, she gets cranky when we talk about it.”

Rebecca chuckled as she glanced between Sara and Jackson while the two made faces at each other before they dissolved into a fit of giggles. She really is grown up. Rebecca mused with a refreshed breath of air in and out of her lungs. And she’s found someone to make her happy. Good.

“Can I get you a drink or something, Winnie?” Sara asked and turned with a pleasant smile directed at Rebecca.

Before the brunette could answer, Jackson was uttering a single chuckle. “Winnie? That’s a bit different.”

“Rebecca, actually,” Rebecca remarked with a smirk shot at Sara -- who had the decency to look abashed -- before swinging her gaze back to Jackson.

“You too?” Jackson asked Rebecca, who nodded. He threw his hands up with a wail and looked at his wife. “You and your weirdo nicknames!”

Sara sighed and put a finger to her lips. “You’re gonna wake the kids up with that racket!”

Jackson opened his mouth, likely to argue against her logic, when a sleepy, young voice called out from the top of the stairs. “Mommy?”

“Now look at what you’ve done,” Sara murmured and smacked Jackson in the arm again, causing him to rub the spot furiously as a furrow pulled between his brows. 

A little boy, no older than Rebecca’s four year old twins, came stumbling down the stairs with a blanket in his hand, rubbing at his eyes with a balled up fist. “Mommy,” he muttered again and pressed himself against Sara’s leg with closed eyes.

“C’mere, buddy,” Sara cooed and scooped the boy up in her arms. 

Rebecca noticed that the little guy had the same mop of chestnut colored hair as Sara, along with a mess of freckles sprinkled across his nose and cheeks. He was a spitting image of his her, really, albeit with slightly darker colored skin more akin to his father. What a cutie, Rebecca thought with a grin.

“Who’s this little guy?” Rebecca asked Sara, her grin turning even softer as she watched the boy settle in Sara’s arms. 

“My baby, Shawn,” Sara told her sister and pushed the boy’s hair out of his face to kiss his forehead. He peered up at his mother with bleary eyes before looking at Rebecca curiously. Sara glanced at Rebecca and smiled before turning her eyes back to Shawn and asking him in a soft voice, “Can you say hi to your Auntie Becca, honey?”

“Hi,” he whispered softly and then immediately buried his face in his mother’s chest.

“He’s a little shy with new people,” Sara chuckled and kissed the top of Shawn’s head before looking up at Jackson with a rueful grin. “And he’s supposed to be sleeping anyways.”

“Here,” Jackson said and held his hands out to Sara. “I’ll put him back to bed, babe.”

Sara smiled at her husband softly and leaned over to kiss his cheek before depositing the near sleeping figure into Jackson’s waiting hands. “Thanks, love.”

“Mm-hm,” Jackson hummed and cradled Shawn in his arms with a soft coo, “C’mon, big guy. Back to bedtime for you.”

Rebecca and Sara watched together as Jackson began to climb the stairs with Shawn in his arms before Sara let out a sigh and glanced at her sister again. “So, what about that drink?”

“Oh. Um, a glass of water would be great,” Rebecca said with a nod. “Already had a couple out at the bar, so I probably shouldn’t have anymore.”

Sara motioned with her hand for Rebecca to follow her into the kitchen before humming in thought. “Were you so worried to see me that you needed to get drunk beforehand?”

“Heh, no,” Rebecca remarked with a chuckle. “It just kind of lined up like that. I’ve been debating when I should do this and it seemed like as good a time as any tonight.”

“Yeah,” Sara said thoughtfully and set a clear glass of ice water in front of Rebecca. “Jules told me that you talked about it a month or so ago. I think she wanted to make sure I wasn’t blindsided when you did make up your mind.”

“I’m guessing you’re close?” Rebecca asked and took a sip from the water. It felt refreshing after the night of drinking and stressing herself out about this meeting.

“To Jules?” Sara asked and Rebecca nodded. “Yeah. She’s my best friend. Practically family, really.”

Rebecca nodded again, her eyes fixed on the counter in front of her. It wasn’t that she couldn’t do small talk but it did leave her feeling stuck on what was supposed to come next. How do I even start this conversation?

“It really has been awhile, hasn’t it?” Rebecca muttered before she flicked her eyes up to Sara with a sad sort of smile. “It feels like I missed a lot.”

“Yeah,” Sara said with a wistful sigh. “It really does.”

“I mean, you’re married and you have a kid-”

“Actually I have two. Allison is, hopefully, still asleep,” Sara interjected with a roll of her eyes before she raised her own glass of water to Rebecca. “Here’s hoping Josh double checks on her when he tucks Boogie in.”

Rebecca laughed and shook her head. “God, you and your nicknames. You remind me of a friend. You’d probably get along, actually.”

Sara flashed a blinding smile at her older sibling. “I get along with everyone, Winnie. It’s my gift.”

“Yeah, I suppose it is. But, back to my point,” Rebecca said with a heavy exhale. “I feel like I missed everything with you.”

Sara laid a hand on Rebecca’s shoulder, her own sad smile appearing on her face. “Don’t do this to yourself. This street has always gone both ways and you’re no more guilty than I am. Let’s just put it behind us and start over.”

Rebecca searched Sara’s eyes with a scrutinizing stare. She dove deep into those chocolate pools and tried hard to find an ounce of malice or resentment behind the words she was saying, but it didn’t exist. The only thing Rebecca could find in Sara’s eyes was a strange sort of honesty and curiosity. 

“What are you thinking about?” Rebecca asked her in a soft, cautious voice, her eyes still locked into Sara’s.

“Not much.” Sara shrugged and shook her head. “I’m just wondering what you’ve been up to all this time. Did you ever end up settling down? Did you start a family of your own? Did you ever find yourself again after the accident? Things like that.”

“Let’s see. Yes, yes, and refer back to answer one,” Rebecca said with a delighted chuckle at this change of pace. Just thinking about Emily made her feel all warm inside.

“Really?” Sara asked enthusiastically and slapped the countertop bar with both hands. “Oh my God, you have to tell me all about him!”

“Uh, well,” Rebecca ran a hand through her hair and chuckled in a self deprecating way. “Her, actually.”

Sara let out a big sigh and stared at the ceiling with a shake of her head. There was a sinking feeling inside of Rebecca as she felt the sting of rejection that she had always expected from her family. Then Sara set her eyes back to her sister and asked her, “Why is it that I’m a magnet for lesbians?”

Rebecca promptly lost all composure at this ridiculous question and soon she was afflicted with the giggles. “Couldn’t tell you, Sar Bear. But I wouldn’t consider myself a lesbian, per se,” Rebecca shrugged again and smiled in that warm way she reserved for Emily as she pictured her perfect little blonde wife. “I’m just a fool for Emmy.”

“Okay this I have to know. How did my sister, thee Becca Knox, manslayer extraordinaire, fall for a girl?” Sara said and climbed up on one of the bar stools before propping her fists under her elbows to stare at Rebecca with expectant eyes. “Tell me, tell me, tell me.”

Rebecca drew in a deep breath and let it out with a chuckle before she met her sister’s excited eyes with a rueful grin. “Well, it all started about ten years back now…”

***

Rebecca did her best to tiptoe into the hotel room and not wake up the rest of her family -- a mostly pointless endeavor since Emily had been waiting up in bed for her when she got back. A quick glance to the right showed that the twins, Marcus and Maxson, were dead asleep and sprawled across the other queen bed in the room. Rebecca smiled and crept over to the boys to kiss each of their foreheads before coming to sit on the bed next to Emily. There wasn’t any disappointment or irritation on Emily’s face, as Rebecca expected, however, she only looked tired and content at the sight of her wife. 

“How did it go?” Emily asked and placed her head on Rebecca’s shoulder before kissing the pulse point on her wife’s neck. 

“Mm,” Rebecca hummed at the pleasant feeling of Emily’s lips against her skin and turned to her with a wide smile and a full heart. “A lot better than I expected. I met my nephew. I didn't even know I had a nephew,” Rebecca chuckled softly. “Or a niece. Or a brother in law for that matter.”

Emily smiled and ran her fingers down Rebecca’s cheek. It was no mystery to her about the estranged relationship that Rebecca had with her family. She also knew that it meant a lot more to Rebecca to have that connection with people than it did to herself.

“It must have felt like closure on all that stuff from the past,” Emily said and slipped her free hand into one of Rebecca’s bigger ones.

“Sort of,” Rebecca said and scrunched her brows together in thought. “But it felt more like opening a new page more than anything.”

“Mm-hm,” Emily hummed and squeezed her wife’s hand in an encouraging gesture to keep going.

Rebecca glanced back up to Emily’s light green eyes, staring back at her with an unrushed curiosity to them. “We talked about everything. For hours.” Rebecca chuckled and rubbed at the back of her neck. “I mean, I’m sure you already figured that out since I was out so late.”

“I did, but you were doing something important,” Emily assured Rebecca and kissed her lips softly. “I wanted to give you space.”

“Yeah,” Rebecca agreed. She pressed her forehead against Emily’s with a soft whisper, “Yeah, it was really nice to catch up with her after all these years. It was like we were teenagers again. I didn’t think I would ever be able to talk to her like that after… everything.”

“I’m so happy for you, baby,” Emily murmured and kissed Rebecca again, pulling a delighted smile from the brunette. 

“Mm, speaking of babies,” Rebecca muttered and pulled back from Emily. She slid down the bed and lifted up Emily’s loose sleeping shirt to reveal a mostly flat belly that she kissed three times -- once on each side of her navel and then just above it. “I know we’re keeping it hush hush, but I kind of told her about our new addition. I was just too excited not to.”

Emily giggled, as she always did when Rebecca began kissing her belly and -- in turn -- the baby that was growing there, before smiling warmly at her wife. “Well, it’s not like we’ll be able to keep it a secret much longer.”

“Maybe not,” Rebecca agreed and shook her head before kissing Emily’s belly one more time and crawling back up to tug Emily into her arms. “But she won’t be telling anyone. I made her promise.”

“Hm,” Emily hummed thoughtfully and snuggled into Rebecca’s side with a content hum. “Do you think everyone’s gonna be surprised?”

“I can think of a few that might be,” Rebecca replied and then cast her eyes at the twins still slumbering peacefully just across the room from them. “I’m more worried about how those two are gonna react.”

“Well, look at it this way,” Emily said and propped herself up enough to meet Rebecca’s eyes again. “You have the chance to show them what a good older sibling looks like now. I’m sure they’ll follow in your example like they always do.”

“Think so?” Rebecca asked with a raised brow and another quick glance at her boys before looking back to Emily.

“Yeah, I do,” Emily said with a sleepy yawn from her lips before she situated her head on Rebecca’s chest once more. “They’ll be good brothers to her.”

“Her, huh?” Rebecca remarked with a chuckle. “I was unaware that we were having a girl.”

“‘S a hunch,” Emily replied in a sleepy mutter.

Rebecca shook her head at Emily and pressed a kiss to the blonde’s temple. “It’s a good hunch, my love,” she whispered against her wife’s hair.

“Mm, good…” Emily mumbled, almost incoherently.

Rebecca squeezed Emily into her side and placed an arm behind her head before she began to recall her night with Sara once more. She considered the example she would be setting for her sons, especially if they were to meet her little sister and see what that looked like in action. I can do this. I can show them how they’re supposed to be with her. And I’m sure they’ll be a lot better than me too… 

With a peaceful sigh, Rebecca kissed Emily’s head again and said softly, “They’re gonna be the best big brothers ever.”