fudging about with style a bit here, but look upon my very very obsessed DnD character, and Elven Hunter.
I don't know if I've included this dummy's backstory before, but it's
DARK, and GRIMMMMMM, and VENGEANCE because he's kind of a joke character I made for a one-shot, and then revived for an actual campaign. He's been a lot of really really dumb fun.
Anyways, the sad dark dark, grim, sad tale of Festi Mitestes:
My name is Festi Mitestes, a wood elf from the humble forest of May’ridin. I was raised and trained to hunt and stalk prey through the forest, but also to love nature and the land as my own kin.
But then the Santa Nation attacked, and raided our super nice and innocent homeland. Many of my fellow wood elves were taken captive and never seen or heard from again. So, being the most beefy strong and nimblest with little fingys, left to track down the Santa Claus and free my fellow elves. Unfortunately, leaving the forest on my own with an impressively low intelligence and wisdom modifier, I was quickly lost in a stream of questions: Where does a Sanny Claus even live? Desert? Tundra?
My Tracking skills did not include “Jolly old man” so my goal was far beyond my reach. My quests have been many, but one lesson I’ve learned, is that elves can die too. It really warped my mind to have to confront my mortality, despite being an immortal wood elf. So I redoubled my efforts, and paid someone else to locate the lair of the Santa Claus.
Hopefully, I’ll liberate my elven comrades before I met with a most untimely death.
(and then a little update, after Santa Claus came back from the dead as an undead eldritch horror monster, yay!)
As I slew the very, very evil, Santa Claus, I realized I had been tricked. At the moment of his death, he re-emerged as an undead abomination of joy, hope, and definitely eating babies. Alas, Santa shot off into the night sky, he exploited my only weakness: Dark vision that only reaches up to 120 feet. As the rest of my party left to enjoy drinks and festivities, I solemnly swore vengeance upon the Santa Claus. But where could he be?
Certainly he knew of my weakness; Dark vision that only reaches up to 120 feet. Surely he would exploit that again, absolutely he would hide somewhere dark, and maybe under? My cleverness never falls me. I infiltrated the Underdark immediately there after, and tricked a number of the inhabitants into taking me as a prisoner. Little did they know, that was definitely my plan all along, definitely.
(if you're familiar with the "Haunted One" backstory, that's my boy, such dark grim-grim dark backstory)
Also, some more dumb stuff about him:
GENDER - Hunter
EYES - Pierce the very soul of my enenemis
SIZE - Medium
HEIGHT - Tall
HAIR - Darker than the night's really dark time
SKIN - So smooth and soft, babies cry at the touch
Hope y'all enjoyed this dumb campy lil' nonsense, also a little sneak peak at a sticker I'll announce when I finish a couple more of themmm

Bitzawolf
2021-06-24 22:20:11 +0000 UTC