Of all sad words of tongue or pen...

• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Sonic Dittos, again?”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Buffered air dodge.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "PK Fire.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Would be very cool if they put hentai into this game.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Would be very cool if they put projectiles into this game.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Would be very cool if they put hentai projectiles into this game.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Elite Smash.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I've been practicing my timeouts recently.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Let's turn Friendly Fire off.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "FYI, I did not shower before this set.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "FYI, I'm addicted to meth.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Hey, this isn't Mario Kart.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Fuck yeah, did you see how many assists I got in that game?”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I probably should have spent more time practicing and less time masturbating.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "My hands and my face are numb, and I can't see out of my eyes anymore.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "FYI, I'm very hard right now. Worryingly hard. The name's Jeff by the way.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Online Smash.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Final Destination No Items 3 Stock 8 Minutes, Dicks Out.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Are you a bird? Cause you're soaring like one. Haha, seriously though. Great plays.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I'm not sure I'm having fun anymore. Is there another game we can play?”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "By any chance have you seen my penis anywhere? (Penis is nowhere to be found).”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I'm gonna go take a shit. Be back in a few hours (Shit is nowhere to be found).”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I've come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass, and it feels like I'm not doing neither particularly well.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I've been taking lessons from a furry.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I'm pretty sure my asshole is fucked up.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "No Johns, but my asshole is fucked up."
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "My asshole will not stop talking shit behind my back."
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "If you bred M. Bison and M. Bison together, would you get M. Bison squared or M. Bison Jr.?”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "My dick is about as long as my body.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I've been getting kinda nasty with my SDs lately.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "You ladies like swords? (Pulls out a sword, and is immediately put into handcuffs).”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I'm gonna go take a shit. Be back in a couple hours.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I'm getting too old for this shit, man. (16 years old).”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I went in for a handshake and this guy kissed the palm of my hand, and then I kissed the palm of his hand, and now we're fucking.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I would stick my dick in a bonfire if Sakurai would just buff the Puff.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Too bad you can't swipe right on Ganondorf in real life.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I think it'd be for the best if we just played friendlies from now on.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I came back to the dorm last night, and I found my roommate dead. Extremely good friend of mine."
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I feel like if ladies could just see my schmovement, they would respect me a lot more.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Who needs game, when I've got neutral?”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I wish they'd make Wii Fit have a much more noticeable penis.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I can't believe I'm actually saying this but, I feel like I would be a stronger player if I actually practiced.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "Everything I taste is metallic.”
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I'm sitting on all of these stocks and I'm not selling, buddy."
• Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are, "I'm a top three player in my household.”