For my very good friend Zan who loves office AU, who I tried to incept with Haikaveh ideas but ended up giving myself brainworms 😂
Script:
After dramatic corporate merger/insider trading scandal, somehow Alhaitham became the “acting” CEO (chief executive officer) and somehow I wound up becoming his Executive assistant!!
🏛: Ugh of all the people who they elected to the position it’s him!!?? What are they thinking?!!?
🌱: Kaveh, make me coffee, Kaveh, re-do this report for me.
🌱: Hey, you look tired, why don’t you take a break and go for a walk?
Kaveh cries tears of joy.
🏛: Oh, how kind!
(actually he just wants to look at Kaveh’s butt).
🏛: … HEY! Stop looking at my butt!!
🌱: That’s a bold statement. Can you prove it?
🏛: He’s a terrible boss (even if he looks dashing in a suit)!!
— 2
Collie, support officer, reporting for duty! I just started working for Teyvat industries. I love my job, and I love my colleagues (Amber, Collei, Eula). It’s a great working environment but lately I’m worried that’s not the case for everyone.
Kaveh is complaining to Collei in the lunch room.
☘️: Kaveh complains about his boss A LOT, at first I thought it was pretty funny! But after a while, I’m not so sure..
Collei sees AlHaitham rubbing Kaveh’s shoulders, Groping him on the butt and giving him asshole back handed compliments.
🌱: Good work, Kaveh. Not just a pretty face.
🏛: 😠💢
[In the photocopy room]
🏛: AlHaitham you have a meeting in 5 minutes!!!
🌱: So cancel it.
🏛: A-AlHaitham!!
Collei is waiting outside the room to use photocopier and she’s mortified.
—
It’s not right!
Your colleague’s name was Kaveh you say? And his boss’s name was..?
AlHaitham!
Tighnari and Cyno give bombastic side-eye.