Happy New Year - Story Repost

My medical and life nonsense continues to be a struggled, so I haven't done much writing. Here is an old Clowntopia tale that I dug up for your enjoyment on this New Year's Eve. May your new year be silly, fun, and bright.

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(From Tales from Clowntopia Pt.1)

A young man ventured into the store on a cold December evening, December 31st, to be exact. He ran his hair through his raggedy brown hair, brushing snow out. He saw a man stocking the shelves and looked around confused. He saw a gaudy plastic bobble head of a clown sitting on the desk. Chuckles the Clown popped up. "Ah, hello! Welcome!"

He walked over, his shoes squeaking loudly. "I didn't hear you come in, my horn is being used at a celebration tonight." He said. "How can I be of use."

"I doubt you can be. I thought this was a liquor store. I swore this was one. Sorry to
intrude, have a good new year."

"You are looking for spirits to celebrate the new year, I take it?" The clown asked.

"Yes."

"I have some in the back stock room, if you are interested. It'll be discounted since I never sell the stuff." He said with a smile.

The young man shrugged. "Sure why not, Lead on, funny man."

Chuckles smiled at the comment and lead him through the colorful bead curtain to the back room. He opened a door and went into a closet and pulled out a large bottle filled with a red liquid. Stopped with a cork, it read "Have a Silly New Year" printed on the side.
"A cork. Old fashioned." He said. Chuckles nodded and smiled.

"I am sure a few sips of this and your cares of the old year will wash away." He said as he handed the bottle to the young man. "What's your name, lad?"

"Chris." He said.

"Well, Chris, go on, have some on the house. It's good stuff. Right out of the bottle."

Chris shrugged and uncorked it with a loud pop. He took the bottle to his lips and took in a large sip of the red drink. He let it slosh around in his mouth as he discerned its taste, then swallowed. Letting out a gasp, he shook his head.

"A lot stronger than I expected from some novelty booze." He said. "That'll put hair on a man's body." He said.

Chuckles smiled as he watched it do just the opposite. On the top of the man's head, hair was sucking back into his scalp rapidly. Moments later only a small tuft was left, which turned as red as the liquid he was drinking. He smiled and tipped the bottle back to his lips and took another sip.

"This is some good shit. Make a man stand tall!" he laughed

As he said this, his body lurched the other way, getting shorter, his clothing getting baggy on him as he went from just under six feet tall to a little over four feet tall in seconds. He shook his head. "Wow, this stuff hits the head fast." He said as he wiggled his loose sleeve so he could take another swig from the bottle. Chuckles grinned as he watched the man chug the liquid, which didn't seem to be emptying out at the rate it was being swallowed.

"Makes me feel thin, lighter than I've felt in ages." He added as his stomach pushed outwards, growing into a flabby belly. His butt enlarged too, getting thicker and chunkier, hips widening to accommodate its new girth. His chest bloated some, pecs pushing out into noticeable man boobs. He wobbled about, starting to get tipsy off the liquid.

"You know." He said with a dumb grin. "I don't feel very silly." He said pointing to the label on the bottle. Chuckles grinned.

"well, you are beginning to look it." He said as he turned the small fat man around to see a mirror. He saw the short stout figure with a single tuft of hair and began to laugh.

"Woah! I must be sloshed! I look so silly…and I…feel it…" he said as a warmth spread through him. As it did, his skin turned a pink shade, going from a pale shade to cartoonish in no time flat. He tipped the bottle back again, and chugged some more before taking a breath.

"Ahh!' he said, sounding refreshed as his lips curled into a blue smile. His front two teeth expanded downwards, getting longer.

"Well, tithh ith thom good sthuff" he lisped as he looked the bottle over. "I'll take it."

"Have a few more sips, why don't you?" Chuckles suggested, and the man wasted no time in agreeing. He chugged, and this time, his ears doubled, then tripled in size, wobbling about as he tried to keep his balance. His feet began to tingle and he stepped out of his shoes and socks and let them free as they began to grow, getting longer and wider, looking more like pontoons than feet. He slapped them loudly as he walked around happily chugging from the bottle.

His nose rounded off into a green ball, rubber to the touch, but also very much his nose. He grabbed it and honked it and laughed. "Shith ith awethom." He said as he waved the bottle in the air.

He tripped over his new feet and fell flat on his face, the bottle flying into the air. He gasped and rolled over and caught the bottle opening first right in his mouth and began to suck it's sweet liquid down, his grin getting wider.

He grew fatter again, his body stretching his oversized clothing until they tore off him, leaving him naked as the day he was born. He looked down past his belly and laughed as he could see his large toes.

"Sober won't be thith fun!" he said.

"You never know. Might be. Let's get you some new clothes. Seem you felt silly enough to grow and shrink right out of yours." Chuckle said, patting him on the head.

He nodded and walked with Chuckles back into the shop area where they went to a rack.

"Fraid this is all I have in your size for tonight, but it's rather fitting." He said as he handed what looked like an oversized diaper to the man. He didn't think twice and slid his chubby legs and thighs through the wholes and wiggled it up his wide hips, where it made a snug fit. He smiled as he looked up and Chuckles. "Perfect to ring in the New Year." He said.

Chuckles took a sash that read "Happy 2013, Clowntopia" and placed it over the man's shoulder, draping over his fat body, and smiled as he took out a pouch. "I hope you don't mind, but I am going to send you somewhere perfect for your new look"

"Whatever you shay, funny man!" he lisped, a mixture of his new teeth and how drunk he had become.

Chuckles took some dust from the pouch and sprinkled it on the mostly bald head below him, and watched as the man smiled dumbly and vanished with a pop.

Pocketing the pouch, Chuckles grabbed the discarded clothes and tossed them in the trash as he walked behind his counter. The bobble-head clown on the desk turned towards him.

"Where did he go?"

"Somewhere where they needed a Baby New Year to help ring things in." He said as he sat down and opened a bottle of cola, his own new year's celebration.

"Well, glad it was him, and not me, if you don't mind me saying, boss."

"Oh, Bobble, you make such a good decoration I wouldn't dream of it. I like you better this way than as a balloon. That was a good suggestion you had."

"Just popped into my head." The bobblehead said, remembering when his time as a Halloween balloon had ended. "Happy New Year, Boss."

Meanwhile, in the Clown Town square, just before the drop of the traditional bouncy ball, a fat short man dressed as Baby New Year appeared and happily counted down the moments until Midnight. As the clock struck, the booze re-wrote his memory. He was now a clown, known for being a drunk, but a friendly, entertaining, cheery drink. Sloshy they called him. He was thrilled. He was home.