Dress Code - Dare To Wear Dress - Chapter 11

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There was a long pause from Jennifer on the other end of the phone, “In love? You’ve only been on one date. Although, I’ve heard that Dylan has that effect on girls. Are you sure you’re in love?”

 “I’ve never really been in love before. Especially with a man,” I said honestly. 

“I know it sounds crazy, but he left not five minutes ago and I already miss him. I can’t get him out of my thoughts. I want to always be in his arms.” Jenn laughed, “Girl, you’ve got it bad for sure. What are you going to do?”

“Well, I told him I wanted to see him again,” I said. “That’s a good start,” Jenn said, “but I mean, after that. How far do you plan on going with him?” I paused for a moment or two, “That’s the problem, isn’t it? I don’t have girl parts, so I can’t take this as far as I would want to. 

Oh! I just can’t get him out of my head!” Jenn was practical, “I guess you should ask yourself if you should even try to pursue him or not. 

You’re a beautiful woman, Heather, and I really think this is who you are. On the one hand, I’m happy you found a great guy. But on the other, I don’t think you’ve given this enough thought.” 

“What’s to think about?” I asked. 

“He’s gorgeous, he’s smart, he’s charming, he’s witty, he’s…” 

“He’s a man,” Jen interrupted. “How do you feel about that? He has a penis. At some point, he’s going to want to put it in you somewhere.” 

I hesitated a moment before saying, “I’m not really thinking that far ahead. But yeah, you’re right. I don’t know how I feel about that part of it.” Jennifer took on a serious tone and advised, “Heather, you need to slow down. I’d say that regardless of what parts you have. 

You just returned from a wonderful date, with a wonderful guy who treated you like gold and was very charming and romantic. I’ve been there myself! 

It’s great. You think you’re in love. 

You think you’ve finally met that one guy you’ve been waiting for, and maybe he is the perfect guy for you. But you need to get a few more dates with him before you give your heart to him. Not to mention that you have a problem most of us don’t have to worry about. 

Something tells me Dylan won’t be exactly excited about the equipment you have.” I sighed, “I know. I know. But I’ve never been with anyone who made me feel this way before! It’s intoxicating! 

I want more.” Jennifer laughed loudly, “Just take it slow, girl. You might not feel this same way tomorrow morning.” I shrugged at the phone, “Maybe. But for now, I’m going to enjoy being in love with someone.” 

  I slowly opened one eye. By the amount of light coming through the window, I could tell that it was late morning. I’m surprised I finally fell asleep. I tossed and turned what seemed to be the whole night. It was driving me crazy. My head was filled with Dylan most of the night. 

I rolled over on my back and stretched out in bed. I just lay there for several minutes, wondering what it would be like to wake up next to Dylan after a night of wild sex. I sat up in my bed and rubbed my eyes. Just what was I thinking? 

All my life I’d considered myself to be an average, straight guy, and here I was, dreaming of not only being back in the arms of a man but having sex with him as well. 

I threw my legs over the edge of the bed, sat up, and ran my hand through my hair. I shook my head slowly and groaned. 

I really need to shake this obsession with Dylan. I’m not really female and there’s no way a relationship with a man, no matter how dreamy he is, would work. I glanced over at the phone on the nightstand next to the bed and fought a sudden impulse to call Dylan to ask how he was doing. 

I stuck my hand in my mouth bit down hard and sputtered through my gritted teeth on my hand, “Stop it! Just stop it!” Just get out of my head, I shouted inside my head. I don’t need to be calling D… D… um, what’s his name! 

Besides, Dylan should call me… I stumbled into the bathroom to take care of my morning business. I stopped to look at myself in the mirror. My hair was in crazy disarray. 

I frowned when I touched my face and felt a slight roughness. I had started having a feeling of almost resentment to having facial hair. 

It wasn’t fair to have to put up with it and I wondered how much electrolysis would cost. 

Staring at my image in the mirror, I decided I was going to take the day off from being Heather. I didn’t have any male clothes, but I did have sweats to wear. It was Sunday so I really didn’t have to shave today. 

I didn’t have to wear make-up today. I absently rubbed my side while thinking I wouldn’t need a bra today. 

There was beer in the fridge, microwave popcorn, and a can of chili in the pantry and I’m sure there was a game of some kind on T.V. Yep, I was set. 

I poured some cornflakes into a bowl settled in, in front of the T.V., and just clicked through the channels. I frowned as I went through the selections my cable company provided. 

I had over three hundred channels and amazingly little actually worth watching. 

I wondered what Dylan was doing. I got up from the couch and sat down in front of my computer and fired up my favorite game. There were still over two hours before any games on T.V., and I was already bored with rummaging through the channels. 

As I waited to get connected to a server, I wondered if Dylan ever played this game. 

I wondered if that guy who shot me as I spawned could have been Dylan. I kept playing, but I sucked worse than normally because I couldn’t get Dylan out of my mind. After a while, I checked the time on my phone and saw that it was only a few minutes before the game started. 

I got up and switched the T.V. to the proper channel and went to the cupboard and pulled out a bag of microwave popcorn. 

I had just pulled the bag out of the microwave when there was a knock on the door. Frowning, I walked over to the door and squinted through the peephole. It was my idiot neighbor, Jerry.

I cracked open the door. Even though I hadn’t shaved, I wasn’t too worried about being detected as it usually takes me a few days just to get a five o’clock shadow. My hair was still messed up and of course, I wasn’t wearing any make-up. 

My sweats should hide the fact that I wasn’t wearing a bra. Frowning through the crack in the open door, I said with annoyance, “What’s up, Jerry?” Grinning, Jerry lifted a six-pack of beer and said, “I noticed you had the game on. 

I thought you might want some company watching it? 

More fun than watching alone, eh?” Frowning even more, I said, “Uh, how did you know I had the game on? 

My blinds are closed.” Shrugging and looking a bit sheepish, Jerry said, “The blinds don’t go all the way down to the sill. 

I can see your T.V. through the crack.” My eyes widened as I said with surprise in my voice, “You’re spying on me? 

That’s pretty creepy, Jerry!” Taken slightly aback, Jerry said, “It’s not like I do it all the time!” Scowling, I said, “I don’t want you doing it at all! Stop spying on me or I’ll report you to the apartment manager! Harry warned me about you!” Jerry lifted his hands defensively, “Okay, okay! Sheesh. 

I didn’t mean anything by it. I don’t want to get tossed out of another apartment. Sorry, Okay? I just thought you might want some company.” “No!” I almost shouted. “I don’t. Especially from a Peeping Tom. 

I was looking forward to vegging today. Keep your eyes to yourself!” I slammed the door. After closing the door, I saw Jerry trying to look through my window through the crack in the blinds. 

I tugged on the blinds and made it fully close. 

Outside I heard Jerry mutter something and then his door closed. I pulled my hair as I thought of how much Jerry could have seen looking into my apartment. This was a new low for Jerry. 

I never considered him as a voyeur. I suddenly felt I was no longer safe in this apartment. I’m sure Jerry isn’t a rapist or anything, but the fact that he’s been watching me. I suddenly felt ill.

I again plopped down on the couch and stared blankly at the T.V. screen, nibbling absently at the popcorn. I was no longer interested in watching the game. I kept looking over my shoulder to check the window. I jumped when the phone rang. Frowning again, I reached for the phone, thinking of how apparently the fates just didn’t want me to watch this game. 

“Hello?” I answered without interest in the phone. “Hey babe! What are you up to?” Oh, my God! It was Dylan! 

I suddenly forgot my name and where I was. “Dylan!” I said with a bit too much excitement in my voice. “Great to hear from you! 

I’m not doing much of anything except watching the game.” Through the phone, Dylan said, “Oh, cool. I forgot that was on. I’m heading to the office to pick up a report I need to adjust tonight for a meeting tomorrow. 

After I pick it up, would it be okay with you if I swing by and watch the game with you? I can’t stay long as I really do have to get this report finished.” Holy crap! Dylan wants to come visit and watch the game with me! I was such a mess! I said, “Sure! That’d be great. I’d love to have some company!” “Great!” said Dylan. “I’ll be there in about half an hour.”

 “See you then!” I said, grinning into the phone. 

Dylan clicked off and I put the handset back on to the cradle. Oh, my God… I had less than thirty minutes before he arrived at my door. I jumped up and ran to the bathroom. Trying to be extra careful, I quickly shaved. I stripped out of my sweats, after checking the front window again, and got in the shower for a minute. 

I blow-dried my hair and quickly brushed it so it wasn’t a fright wig anymore, and then a minimum amount of eyeliner, mascara, and a dusting of powder. 

Being the weekend, I didn’t want to wear the same make-up I’d wear to work, but I couldn’t face Dylan with no make-up at all. 

After looking in the mirror, I applied some gloss. I put on my bra. I started to pull my sweatpants back on when I decided I’d better put my gaff on. The sweatpants fit loose, but I decided it was best not to take any chances. I then tore around the house picking up bits of trash here and there. 

So much for vegging. God help me, I was actually fluffing pillows on the couch when the doorbell rang. 

I froze in panic. Had I forgotten anything? After a quick glance around confirmed my apartment was presentable, though there was little I could do about it now. I took a deep breath to compose myself and stepped towards the door. 

If it was Jerry, there was a good chance I’d commit murder… 

I squinted through the peephole and sighed with relief when I saw Dylan standing patiently outside. I opened the door and couldn’t help but gush, “Hi! Come on in.” “Thank you,” said Dylan with a smile. He held up a couple of boxes and said, “I took the liberty of picking up some Chinese. I hope that’s okay.” 

“Sure! I love Chinese food.” I pointed at the couch, “Make yourself at home.” He walked up to me, bent down gave me a quick kiss, and said with a grin, “Don’t mind if I do.” He then set the two boxes of Chinese food down on the coffee table and plopped himself down on the couch. 

The kiss dazed me momentarily. I smiled and followed Dylan to the couch where I sat down right next to him. He put his arm around my shoulder, and I rested my head on his shoulder. I felt so safe and warm there with Dylan’s arm around me. 

“How has your day been?” Dylan asked as he popped a mouthful of Chinese food into his mouth. I waved my hand dismissively and said, “Not too bad. Just doing a little cleaning.” 

I snuggled deeper into Dylan’s shoulder as he played with my hair a bit. 

Dylan looked around at the area of my apartment visible from our location on the couch. He grunted a laugh, “You should see my apartment. It looks like a bomb went off in it.” So did mine, until half an hour ago, I thought. 

Before I could answer, Dylan bent his head down and kissed me. It was a long, lingering kiss. 

I turned my head and changed my position to meet his kiss. He smiled at me and hugged me a bit tighter.

 My whole body tingled. I closed my eyes and sighed. I felt secure and warm in Dylan’s embrace, and then I became aware of something else. I felt a stirring of pressure against the gaff I used to keep my privates from exposing themselves. I was getting turned on by being kissed by a man. 

Yes, I know I said I loved him. Yes, I really like being kissed by him, but now to be physically aroused by him? Should this worry me? Or is Mr. Happy just reacting to any physical stimulus? Maybe I’m just overreacting. 

Dylan glanced down at me and asked, “You okay? You got very quiet.”

 I just smiled back up at him, “I’m fine. I’m just enjoying watching the game with you.” 

Dylan smiled back, playing with my hair and said, “Thanks for letting me visit on such short notice.” 

He kissed my forehead. We sat there mostly quiet for a while, eating our Chinese dinners and snacking on popcorn. We’d high-five whenever his favorite team did something good. 

To be honest, I really didn’t care anymore about the game. During a commercial break, Dylan leaned forward to set his empty food carton on the coffee table. 

He turned and looked back at me and grinned. He said, “My God you’re beautiful.” As he sat back on the couch he cupped the side of my face in his hand and with his free hand, brushed what short hair I had from my face. 

He looked at me with a slightly puzzled look and said, “There’s something very special about you.” And then his lips were pressing hard against mine. His tongue slid into my mouth and pressed against mine. 

I found myself sucking on his tongue as he pressed more into me, his breathing getting harder as the passion of his kisses began to explode. His hand slipped to my faux breast. 

I pulled his hand away, less for modesty and more for not wanting him to discover my breasts weren’t as firm as they should be. 

I threw my arm around his neck and returned his passion with my own that had been building since his first kiss the night before. 

I pushed my tongue into his mouth and kissed him with wild passion. I moved my face to kiss his neck when my hand slipped down to his lap. 

Without thinking I closed my hand a little around the bulge coming up through his pants. Holy crap… Dylan had a massive hard-on. It wasn’t the game on T.V. or the Chinese food causing his hard-on… it was me. The shit just got real. 

I’ve been where he’s at. I know what it means. 

He’s turned on by me. I don’t know what to think about that. I’m in near panic with my hand on Dylan’s very hard penis. It was through his clothes, but still… it was another guy’s penis! I started to lift my hand away when Dylan put his hand on top of mine and pressed down. 

He was using my hand to rub his most private part. This was too much for me. I tried to rise up, but Dylan just leaned forward to continue kissing me. 

We toppled over on the couch with Dylan on top of me, his hand still holding mine firmly in place. His lips still pressed against mine, Dylan let go of my hand and I quickly pulled it away, but he then pushed his hips against mine. 

We were fully clothed, but his rocking back and forth with his crotch pressed against mine was an obvious invitation to something I deep down didn’t want or could have. 

I turned my face to the side, took a breath, and said, “Dylan, no…” Dylan continued breathing hard and thrusting his hips for a few more seconds. 

He let an expression of anger or at least disappointment cross his face for a quick moment as he stopped and lifted himself from me. 

His eyes bore into mine for a few heartbeats before he flashed a smile, kissed me once more, and pulled himself from me. 

As he stood up, he said, “Wow. I really need to go so I can get that report finished. 

And the game’s over and my team didn’t win.” Still a little dazed from the panic I had just experienced, I pulled my feet over the edge of the couch and slowly stood up as well. 

I said, “I’m sorry.” He glanced at the T.V. and shrugged, “It’s just a game.” He turned back to me and said, “Thanks again for inviting me over.” 

He took my shoulders in his hands and bent over and gave me a short kiss. He ran his fingers through my hair and said, “See you later, baby.” He turned and walked to the door.

I followed him as he opened the door and started hurrying down the steps. I stood there watching him, my emotions a total jumble. I’m sure he thought he was about to score. Somewhere, a part of me actually wanted him to. The rest of me knew that wasn’t going to happen. But did I piss him off? Will I hear from him again? Do I want to hear from him again? 

And why does my heart still yearn for him even as I watched him get into his car?

 “So, you invited Mr. Audi to watch the game with you, huh?” said a voice next to me. 

I turned and saw Jerry watching Dylan drive away. I hadn’t even heard his apartment door open. Feeling suddenly pissed, I turned to Jerry and said, “Yes I did, Jerry. 

He’s my boyfriend. And quite frankly, it’s none of your fucking business who I invite into my apartment.”

 I spun on my heel and stormed back to my apartment. As I closed the door, I heard Jerry say, “Oooh. Somebody is pissed off!”

 “Heather? You okay?” I took a few more steps before I realized someone had spoken to me. My mind was a million miles away as I walked past Jennifer’s reception desk. 

I turned and looked back at Jennifer and realized she’d said something, “What?” Looking puzzled, Jennifer said, “I asked if you were okay. 

Your eyes had kind of a glassy look.” I looked over my shoulder and off to the sides as I approached her desk. 

“Yeah. Do you have a minute? I think I need some girl talk.” Jennifer adjusted her seating position and leaned on her reception desk, “Sure. Is there something going on? Is this about Dylan?” 

I nodded, “Yes. It’s about Dylan. He came over yesterday to watch a game on T.V. with me. Naturally, I was excited to have him over. Everything was going good and then… then…” I paused for a moment. “And then?” Jennifer prompted.

I felt a little embarrassed talking about it, but I said with a slight smile, “We started making out on the couch. And then… then…” 

I paused again, not sure if I should say anymore. “And then?” Jennifer prompted. I took a deep breath and said, “And then Dylan got like totally turned on, and uh, I could tell he wanted to do me right here on the couch. I told him ‘no.’” Jennifer’s eyes got wide as she said, “Oh wow. 

He wanted to have sex with you? He’s not a guy who’s used to being turned down. I know you had to, but…” her voice trailed off. Frowning I said, “Like you said, I had to. But do you think in one way I screwed up? 

Did I piss him off? Will he call me again?” Jennifer shrugged and was truthful, “I’m not really sure. Guys are weird and they have very fragile egos. 

Dylan isn’t used to having a woman jump up and down on his ego like that. You’ll just have to wait and see or give him a call in a few days if you don’t hear from him.” I just nodded and started to walk away, “Thanks, Jenn.” Jennifer smiled, “Sure. Keep me posted, okay?”

 I stopped and turned back to her and added, “The thing that frightens me is a small part of me wished he could have done it.” 

As I walked through the office area on the way to my cube, I saw several guys trying hard to not look like they were looking at me. 

It bothered me less that they thought I was a woman, since that was the image I was presenting. It bothered me a bit more that they thought looking at me or any other woman like a piece of meat instead of a human being was okay. 

What bothered me the most was that two of the men trying hard not to look at me knew me before I became Heather. Carl, standing there stuffing his face with a doughnut had money riding on the bet, which seems to have been forgotten, but he was staring at me like he did all the other women in the office he thought were attractive. 

I stopped at the supply cabinet not far from where Carl and some guy I’d never seen before were standing.

I saw the new guy lean over to Carl to whisper, but I could just make out what he was saying as I squatted down to get to the bottom shelf. 

“Who’s that?” asked New Guy. “Single?” Not really trying to avoid being overheard Carl said, “That is out of your league, boy. 

Aren’t there women in Planning?” “Not like that,” said New Guy. “Man! And, nobody’s out of my league!” 

I sighed and didn’t bother to look in their direction as I stood up and closed the cabinet door. At least Carl didn’t give me away, or maybe he doesn’t remember. Was Harry that forgettable?

 I dropped my purse on my desk and plopped into my chair and just sat there for a minute staring at the login prompt on my computer display. I was so lost in thought that I was startled when my office phone rang. The number was Ms. Rogers’. 

“Hello?” I said dully into the phone. 

“Hello?” asked Ms. Rogers. “Is that how we trained you to answer your business phone?” I said, “Would you like to hang up and call me again?” Ms. Rogers said, “Don’t be a wise-ass. I need you to come to my office immediately.” 

“Yes ma’am,” I said as I hung up and phone and stood up. In just a matter of seconds, I stood in Ms. Rogers’ doorway. “Come in, Heather,” said Ms. Rogers. “Have a seat. 

Oh, and close the door.” Closing the door was never a good sign. I wracked my brain trying to figure out what I might have done wrong. Ms. Rogers sucked in a breath and looked me square in the eye. With a tinge of bitterness in her voice, she said, “Heather, you remember your little act of brilliance when you declared to Mr. Keys that you’re transgendered? 

Well, apparently Mr. Murphy was asking HR about you. So now, HR is requesting information about your legal status. They want to update their records to reflect your new gender. 

They would like a statement from your therapist, a copy of your new Social Security card with your new name on it, and a copy of your new driver’s license. They need to make changes to your benefits package to reflect your new name and gender. They just need the legal proof of name and gender change. 

Do you have that handy Ms. Stephens?” 

My new confidence faded as a cold shock shot down my spine. I said, “You know I don’t have any of that! You know I just made that up! And you don’t have to be mean about it!” 

Frowning, Ms. Rogers said, “Mean? This is nothing. It’s my neck riding on this, not just yours, remember? HR and Mr. Murphy won’t wait forever. 

Especially Murphy. I strongly suggest you get busy getting these documents.”

 Feeling myself growing numb, I asked, “What do I do? How do I get any of this?” Narrowing her eyes at me, Ms. Rogers said, “It was your big idea, so it’s your problem, Heather. You may go.” 

She then smiled sweetly at me and said, “Oh. Don’t forget that you’re presenting at the IT Steering Committee meeting this morning.” She then made a shooing motion with her fingers. 

I left Ms. Rogers’ office visibly shaken. I went straight back to my cubicle and plopped into my chair. I put my elbows on the desk and cradled my head in my hands. 

I could feel tears start to well up in my eyes and the last thing I needed to do was start crying. 

What was I going to do? If I was exposed by Mr. Murphy, it would get me and Ms. Rogers fired, end the IOTEK project, get Ms. Hoden pissed at me and Dylan would despise me. This was a total disaster! 

Lost in my thoughts, I didn’t notice anyone standing in the doorway of my cube. 

I looked up and saw a delivery guy holding a vase with a huge bouquet of flowers. “Ma’am?” asked the delivery guy.

 “Are you Heather Stephens?” I just nodded and he set the flowers on my desk. He touched the bill of his cap and said, “Have a nice day.” 

He left as quietly as he had arrived. I sat there stupefied looking at the large bouquet of flowers. It was a beautiful arrangement of a wide variety of flowers and colors. 

Why am I getting flowers I asked myself. I noticed a small envelope attached to the flowers. I pulled it off and opened it. Inside was a note card. The card said, “Dear Heather. I’m so sorry for my behavior on Sunday. 

I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me. I don’t know your favorite flower, so I just sent them all, Love, Dylan.” Oh my God. A guy just sent me flowers. And he signed it, “Love, Dylan”. Love. 

He loves me. Oh my God, he loves me. This just blew the doors off my emotions. A man I loved just admitted love for me. 

The conflict between the old Harry and the new Heather was about to make my head explode. I covered my mouth and nose with both hands as I stared at my flowers as tears rolled down my cheeks.