[3.5 Justifying the Unjustifiable]

- A Satisfied Woman: Beyond the Limits of Acting -

To discuss the artistic legitimacy of my work, let's revisit the story of a woman who once experienced asphyxiation in a performance.

When I wrapped a rope tightly around her neck, I observed her reactions carefully.

At first, she was confused, but to someone familiar with asphyxiation acting, this was nothing new.

Having experienced this type of acting multiple times, she was more accustomed to it than most people, and this experience, which crossed the boundary between acting and reality, was extremely valuable.

Having realized the difference between simulated and real asphyxiation, she encountered a completely different kind of pain and despair in reality.

The simulated asphyxiation in acting is merely an expression of emotion in a controlled environment, but the reality she now faced was a genuine threat to her life.

I was confident that by feeling this difference firsthand, she would be able to deliver more intense and truthful performances in the future.

Her experience would transcend mere acting, elevating it to an artistic value that would set a new standard in asphyxiation acting.

Her dedication and experience were essential steps toward reaching the heights of true artistry, and now her acting would be the product of genuine experience, not mere imitation.

The beauty that blossomed from her pain and despair captivated me, and as I tied the rope around her neck and watched, I anticipated her transformation into a true artist.

At first, she tried to escape the situation as if she were acting out a scene in a movie.

Having previously performed scenes involving escape from asphyxiation, she tried to control the situation, but reality was nothing like acting.

In acting, there is always a safety net that allows you to stop at any moment, but now she was in a situation where her life was truly at risk.

As time passed, she began to realize the difference between acting and reality, descending into fear that she might not be able to escape.

Her hands instinctively tried to loosen the rope, and her body struggled desperately for air.

Her fingers frantically groped around the knot, her nails scraping for hope in despair.

Even in pain, her movements maintained a certain elegance, and her body tensed as if performing a beautiful ballet in a fight for survival.

Her toes kicked the floor, maintaining grace even in her frantic actions.

Her chest rose and fell violently, and the struggle for breath seemed like a work of art emerging from her pain.

Her eyes widened in fear and agony, and the despair that shone within them was as lovely as a pearl glimmering in the deep ocean.

Her face gradually revealed confusion and terror, and her trembling lips seemed to search for a glimmer of hope.

Her desperate movements were a perfect dance, and her pain and fear were the most beautiful artistic expressions to me.

Every time her hands convulsively moved to untie the knot, her body descended further into pain, and that pain approached me as the essence of beauty.

Every movement, every breath she took was the purest artistic expression born of her desperate struggle to survive.

Watching her, I felt a strong surge of artistic impulse.

I recalled the time when she performed an asphyxiation scene in a movie.

Then, she had perfectly expressed fear and pain, but now her struggle was not mere acting.

Every movement and breath was the pain of someone genuinely fighting for their life, and she had transcended the limits of acting, becoming the subject of true suffering.

Her face slowly revealed genuine fear and pain, a contrast that only accentuated her noble beauty.

Her eyes widened further, reflecting the light of terror, deepening her despair.

Her breath grew increasingly ragged, sounding like a tragic melody of life blossoming from pain.

Her hands desperately tried to loosen the knot, but I had tied it so tightly that it was impossible.

Every time her fingers groped for the knot, the desperate gesture was as beautiful as a flower blooming in pain.

Her struggles grew more intense, and her movements became more graceful and powerful, like a final dance to save her life.

Her face slowly became overshadowed by despair, a shadow that only highlighted her beautiful features.

Her lips turned blue and trembled, the trembling emphasizing her pain and evoking both pity and love.

Sweat and tears trickled down her cheeks, sparkling like jewels, and every expression and gesture became a perfect work of art.

I lovingly watched her.

The beauty that blossomed from her pain, the power of life shining even in despair, stirred in me an incomparable artistic impulse.

Every movement, every expression, and the beauty that blossomed in her despair was the most beloved artistic expression to me.

Even in her pain and fear, she tried to maintain her strength, but as time passed, she gradually reached her limit.

Her eyes reflected deeper fear and despair, and her lips trembled, letting out desperate pleas.

Though her voice weakened as she begged me to stop, the desperation within it grew clearer.

But I was not swayed by her pleas.

On the contrary, as I watched her descend into despair, I felt my art nearing completion.

Her body gradually lost strength, her perfect posture slowly collapsing.

Her knees buckled, her body leaned forward, and every movement seemed like a beautiful dance.

When she could no longer hold out and fell to her knees, I could see that hope was fading from her eyes.

Her hands no longer moved with precision to untie the knot but merely fumbled helplessly.

Despair was etched on her face, yet even in that despair, she retained her beauty.

Watching her, I felt justified in my actions.

Her painful struggle was the most beautiful artistic expression to me.

As she transcended the limits of acting, I could feel my art coming to completion.

Just before she lost consciousness, her painful gestures grew more intense.

Her fingers frantically groped around the knot, as if trying to grasp hope, moving desperately.

Her legs convulsed as they struck the floor, kicking the air in an unstable wobble.

The desperate movements dramatically revealed the instinct for life that blossomed in pain, creating an elegant aura as if she were performing her last dance.

Her toes constantly struggled, showing signs of exhaustion.

Her face displayed a mix of pain and despair.

Her eyes were wide open, holding fear and despair, and the tears that sparkled within them shone like jewels.

Her lips trembled as they opened in a desperate attempt to breathe, but no air entered.

In that moment, the sound escaping her lips was like the climax of a tragic piece of music.

Her chest heaved with all its might, showing her desperation to breathe.

Her breath grew more ragged, increasingly erratic, revealing her pain and her clinging to life.

The muscles in her face contorted in spasms, forming a grotesque yet wonderfully beautiful expression.

Watching her movements, I was certain that she was experiencing true pain and despair, transcending the limits of mere acting.

Every movement and expression, the pain she was in, was becoming the most fascinating and captivating work of art I had ever seen.

As her breath slowed to a stop, I felt my art reaching its final stage, and I would forever remember the beauty of that moment.

Her pain and fear took on a new meaning in the context of my art, and every movement, every breath she took, brought me intense pleasure.

It saddened me that ordinary people could only view the asphyxiation process as mere acting.

They missed the opportunity to experience and encounter the true depths of the human psyche.

I believed that this process should be accessible to everyone.

Her painful struggle and desperate gaze were not just acting.

They were true art.

I wanted to share my art with the world.

Everyone needed to understand my art through her pain and feel its beauty.

As she took her last breath, I was certain her performance had been perfectly realized.

Her body moved with desperate energy, resembling a poignant dance.

Her hands trembled, grasping at the air as if reaching for hope, her fingers convulsing as they attempted to untie the knot.

The desperate gestures maintained a certain elegance, and her figure became even more attractive as she exerted all her strength.

Her legs thrashed as they slid on the floor, with her toes trying to find support anywhere they could.

The desperate struggle was intense and beautiful, like the last dance of life.

Her chest rose and fell violently as she fought for breath, her movements revealing the beauty of the instinct to survive, even in pain.

Her face displayed an intersection of extreme pain and despair, forming an expression as beautiful and tragic as a painting.

Her eyes widened, searching for a glimmer of hope, while her lips trembled, gasping for breath.

Her desperate efforts carried the intensity of a flame burning brightly, and I felt this moment marked the perfection of her performance.

Just before she lost consciousness, every movement of hers harmonized with her desperation, culminating in a perfect work of art.

Her struggle beautifully captured the dramatic intersection of the instinct for life and the shadow of death, perfectly satisfying my artistic impulse.

Her body used all its remaining strength to move desperately, gradually slowing down and losing power.

Her hand reached out toward the air, only to fall helplessly, her legs no longer kicking.

Her eyes were wide open but unfocused, indicating the life slowly draining from her.

The light within them began to fade, replaced by a serene calmness.

Her lips, slightly parted, no longer struggled for air.

Watching this transformation, I could not help but praise how beautiful and marvelous her final moments were.

The dramatic gestures and expressions just before she lost consciousness perfectly captured the process of life slipping away, fulfilling my artistic vision.

Her face was now filled with a calmness freed from pain, and this image would remain forever in my memory like a beautiful painting.

The moment she found peace marked the culmination of my art, and every change during that moment was marvelous and beautiful.

The transition from her painful struggle to the serene face was the most radiant artistic achievement I had ever witnessed, completing her transformation into a perfect work of art.

This display and change are what should be expected of anyone attempting asphyxiation acting in the future.

Every moment she showed was not mere acting but a genuine experience.

She must have harbored a hidden desire to experience real asphyxiation.

All I did was grant her that hidden desire.

Although she had explored the limits of asphyxiation through acting, she must have deeply harbored a desire to experience true asphyxiation.

I believe that every woman carries such a desire for asphyxiation.

However, they are simply not aware of it themselves.

Having acted for so long, she must have known her desire for asphyxiation to some extent and devoted herself to acting to fulfill it.

Yet acting alone could never truly satisfy her, and in the end, she only completely fulfilled that desire when she faced the moment of real asphyxiation.

I am certain that her final experience was incredibly valuable to her.

She transcended mere acting and, by experiencing true pain and despair, confronted the hidden desires deep within herself.

This moment she showed was the realization of her asphyxiation desire, and in that, she achieved true artistic fulfillment.

Her experience was not mere acting but the completion of true art.

She had now transcended the limits of acting and, by experiencing real asphyxiation, reached the pinnacle of true art.

Her pain and calmness held a beauty that could not be expressed through mere acting, and her name would forever remain in the history of art.

Through this invaluable experience, I bless her for fully realizing her asphyxiation desire.

The fact that this woman, who had only acted before, could finally experience real asphyxiation in such a proper manner was a blessing for her and a moment of becoming a true artist.

She was no longer simply an actress but someone who experienced real pain and despair and, by transcending those boundaries, showed a new dimension of art.

The fact that she could achieve such a deep artistic fulfillment through her final experience of true asphyxiation, which far surpassed any acting she had done, is astounding.

I bless her for this experience, hoping that everyone who wishes to attempt asphyxiation acting in the future will, like her, experience true pain and, within it, achieve artistic fulfillment.

Her moment of finding peace itself became a perfect work of art, and she met her final moments as a true artist.

Her dedication will inspire many in the future, serving as a precious example that they too might have the opportunity to experience the true beauty of asphyxiation like she did.

Through her, we have come to understand what true art is.

Her pain and calmness will become a standard for all future asphyxiation performances, and her name will forever remain in the history of art.

The reason I truly asphyxiated a woman who had experience with asphyxiation acting was to make her aware of its true allure.

I believe that asphyxiation can never be fully satisfying through mere acting.

Asphyxiation in acting is just an imitation, and the true pain and despair, and the beauty that blooms within them, can never be felt.

The true allure of asphyxiation can only be understood by actually undergoing the process.

An actor can mimic pain, but truly experiencing that pain is an entirely different level of experience.

By experiencing real asphyxiation, she was able to transcend being a mere actress and become a true artist.

The beauty that blossomed from her pain, the calmness that emerged in the moment her life slipped away, was the pinnacle of true art, something no acting could ever express.

I believe her experience will serve as a valuable example for everyone who wishes to attempt asphyxiation acting in the future.

By having the opportunity to experience the true beauty of asphyxiation like she did, they too will be able to pursue true art beyond mere acting.

The moment her breath ceased was not just a performance but the completion of true art.

Asphyxiation is not just an expression of pain but a process of discovering the beauty and calmness that emerge within it.

By experiencing real asphyxiation, we realized its true allure, and her dedication will remain forever in the history of art.

Her name will be remembered as the true exemplar of asphyxiation acting in the future, and the genuine pain and beauty she showed will set a new standard in art.

I pay tribute to her dedication and courage, confident that through her final moments, we have come to understand the true meaning of art.

Her experience was not mere acting but the pinnacle of true art, and it will serve as a standard for all future asphyxiation performances.

I bless her for this noble experience, and I will forever remember the beautiful artistic fulfillment she achieved.

The moment her consciousness collapsed was not just one of pain but the zenith of brilliant art, and in that moment, she was perfected as an artist.

This woman's experience became the basis for my claim that my art is not only for myself but also for women.

I dream of a world where this process is accessible to everyone and praise my art.

- The Essence of Art: Beyond Violence -

Reinterpreting the act of violence from an artistic perspective goes beyond mere debate.

What I propose is an exploration of the complex emotional and psychological impact that violence has on humans, transcending its traditional meaning.

The act of asphyxiation is not merely about inducing pain; it is a serious inquiry into the dignity of life within the harmony of control and restraint.

Control and power are essential aspects of this form of art.

However, what I seek goes beyond traditional notions of control, delving into the depths of human nature and emotions.

The act of asphyxiation is both a symbol of control and power and a stage for exploring the depths of human emotion.

It is not mere coercion, but an artistic act that poses profound questions about the fundamental issues of life.

This form of art raises moral questions.

Where is the boundary between violence and art?

How can we distinguish between the two concepts?

My approach goes beyond traditional moral boundaries, leading to an intense emotional experience and a fundamental exploration of human nature.

The boundary between art and violence can be differently constructed depending on an individual’s psychological and emotional experience.

My journey transcends mere violence or art.

It is a profound exploration of the human psyche and an effort to understand the various layers of emotion.

Transforming a violent act into a form of art is an attempt to comprehend the complex relationship between life and its loss, pain and joy, control and freedom.

It is an internal exploration as an artist and a journey into the deepest realms of human experience.

The exploration of this form of art is an attempt to redefine the boundaries between art and morality.

The act of asphyxiation is not merely a physical act but a profound inquiry into the essence of life and an emotional exploration.

This form of art raises moral questions and attempts to expand our understanding of art and humanity.

It is the ultimate quest to understand the depth of human existence and emotion.

The spectrum of emotions that emerge in the moment of asphyxiation is vast and profound.

It is not merely a physical act but a weaving of emotions and a deep inquiry into the essence of life.

Just as an artist combines colors to express emotions, I observe the changes in emotion that occur during the process of asphyxiation.

Each breath, each gasp, is a shade that reveals the varied emotions of life.

The rhythm of breathing creates the melody of life.

Each phase of breathing—speeding up, slowing down, and stopping—reveals the depth and fragility of life.

This rhythm is not merely a physiological response but music that shows the flow of emotions and the energy of life.

This music is not just heard with the ears but felt with the heart and understood with the soul.

The interaction between art and life is the core of my exploration.

Art is a way of understanding life and an inquiry into the essence of existence.

The act of asphyxiation, as a form of art, explores the complex relationships between life and death, pain and pleasure, control and freedom.

It is a journey toward a deep understanding of emotion and life that transcends mere physical acts.

In my view, asphyxiation is an artistic expression that explores the depths of existence.

This act reveals the fragility of life, explores the depth of emotion, and is a way of understanding the essence of existence.

It is not violence but a profound artistic inquiry into the love and respect for life and an attempt to understand the mysteries of existence.

The act of asphyxiation is a powerful expression as art.

It reveals the fragility of life, explores the boundaries between life and death, and focuses on understanding the essence of humanity.

This form of art shows deep respect for life and the depth of emotion, pursuing a journey of profound understanding of emotion and life.

The story of the woman whose neck I tied with a rope is an example of artistic exploration that goes beyond the moral concepts we typically consider.

If this experience were judged solely by the standard of violence, the deep artistic meaning and insight into human nature embedded within it would be missed.

She was not merely an actress.

Through her acting career, she had repeatedly portrayed extreme situations like asphyxiation, constantly exploring its limits.

However, the pain and despair she experienced in acting were always within controlled environments, and she never had the opportunity to experience true pain.

What she truly sought was to experience the beauty and instincts of life that emerge from real pain, beyond the limits of acting.

I read the hidden desire deep within her and provided her with the real experience of asphyxiation to fulfill that desire.

This was not merely an act of violence but a process to help her reach the artistic heights she truly longed for.

Through this experience, she was no longer just an actress but became a true artist.

The pain and despair she experienced were not merely physical pain.

It was a process that fulfilled the artistic longing deeply rooted within her.

Her struggles and desperate movements were instinctive expressions to preserve life, and the beauty that emerged from them was an artistic level that could never be reached through mere acting.

Here, we must ask an important question: What is art?

Art is the process of revealing human nature and exploring the essence hidden within.

The pain and despair she experienced were crucial elements in completing her artistic achievement.

This is part of a deep exploration of human nature that cannot be dismissed as merely a matter of violence.

Her experience provides us with an important lesson.

What we seek through art is not merely the surface of beauty but the true essence hidden within it.

The beauty and power of life that blossomed in her pain teach us the true meaning of art.

Therefore, this experience should not be viewed solely as a violent act but understood as an artistic exploration.

Her pain and despair were not mere suffering but a process of reaching the true artistic heights she sought.

Her dedication left us all with an important artistic lesson.

Through this experience, we are led to deep reflection on the essence of art and human instinct.

The pain she experienced was not merely physical; it was a process that fulfilled her artistic desire.

Through this, we are once again prompted to reflect on what art is and what it means in our lives.

Now, we embark on a journey to explore the essence of humanity through art.

Through her experience, we realize the true meaning of art and deeply reflect on how it influences our lives.

Her dedication left us with an important artistic lesson, and through it, we come to understand the true value of art.

- Empathy in the Shadows: A Complex Portrait of Human Emotions -

Our emotions paint a complex portrait.

The colors of these emotions are sometimes bright and vivid, but other times dark and indistinct.

In my journey, this richness of emotion leads to empathy, understanding, and a deep emotional connection.

The fear, despair, and emotional shock that emerge in the moments of asphyxiation resonate powerfully with me.

This emotional empathy elevates my actions from mere physical acts to the realm of art.

The act of asphyxiation is not a simple physical manipulation for me.

It is an exploration of emotional depth, the fragility of human existence, and the essence of life.

When I tighten the grip around the neck, what I feel is not just the application of force.

It is a moment of deep emotional connection.

Each breath, each tear, each heartbeat is an emotional experience that I share with my subject.

My journey is about exploring the depths of emotion.

From fear and despair, through resistance and struggle, and finally to surrender and peace, the act of asphyxiation reveals various layers of emotion.

This emotional journey is an intense exploration of human nature, the mystery of life, and the depth of existence.

As an artist, my actions are part of an emotional shadow, an inner struggle.

Each act evokes powerful emotions in me and represents my ongoing journey to explore the depths of human emotion.

This emotional struggle shapes the essence of my art and leads to an exploration of the complexity of emotions.

The act of asphyxiation is not mere violence or moral deviation.

It is a deep exploration of emotional depth, the complexity of human emotions, and the fleeting nature of existence.

Through this, I walk the path of an artist seeking to understand the deepest layers of human emotion and the mystery of life.

This form of art is a journey of understanding the depth of existence and exploring emotional connection.

The human heart is a sea of complex emotions.

Each of us rides different waves and sails in different directions in this sea.

My journey is about exploring the depths of emotions that others may find difficult to understand.

The moments of asphyxiation are not just acts in themselves but emotional dances, exchanges of empathy.

As I observe the struggle, I travel between the fragility of life and the resilience of the human spirit.

This is not about control or domination but about connection and empathy.

Art has always been about exploring the essence of human emotion.

The act of tightening the grip around the neck creates a deep emotional connection between me and the subject.

It is a dance of empathy, an exchange of emotions.

This act is not merely about control for me but a way of understanding and feeling the depths of human emotion.

The subject's pain, her fear, her despair, and ultimately her peace are emotional experiences I wish to share.

The act of tying a rope around a woman's neck stemmed from my artistic exploration and deep empathy for women.

Many may see this act as mere violence, but through this experience, I sought to deepen my understanding and empathy toward women.

To truly understand a woman's emotions and pain, I chose to witness firsthand the pain and despair she feels from her perspective.

This was not about causing her suffering but a serious artistic attempt to directly experience the depth of emotion she felt.

The pain, fear, and despair she experienced in the moment of asphyxiation revealed her true inner emotions, and through this process, I could fully understand her feelings.

This experience also held significant emotional meaning for me.

As I watched her pain, I felt every emotion she experienced.

Witnessing her desperate struggle and the peace in her final moments, I came to understand the true depth of her inner emotions.

This was not merely from the perspective of an observer but a process of empathy, sharing, and understanding her pain.

Through this experience, I was able to understand a woman's pain more deeply.

The beauty and despair that blossomed from her pain gave me new artistic insights and evoked a deep empathy for women's emotions.

The despair and pain she felt were not just hers but also mine.

Through this, I felt a sense of oneness with her, which became a crucial turning point in my artistic expression.

This experience made me realize how deeply art and human emotion are connected.

By understanding and empathizing with her pain, I could make my artistic expression more authentic.

Her pain and despair were essential elements in completing my artistic impulse, and through them, I was able to reach the true heights of art.

The reason I share this story is out of a desire for others not to view her pain merely as violence but to understand the meaning of artistic exploration through deep empathy with her.

The beauty that blossomed from her pain reveals fundamental human emotions that we can all understand and empathize with.

Through her pain, I could empathize more deeply with women, and through this, my artistic expression reached a new dimension.

Her dedication was not mere suffering but a revelation of fundamental human emotions that we all need to understand and empathize with.

In this way, my journey is about exploring the most complex and deep layers of human emotion.

The moments of asphyxiation are spaces of emotional connection and deepen the understanding of human nature.

This goes beyond the ethical standards defined by society, including a deep understanding and empathy for human emotions and existence.

This form of art makes me an emotional explorer.

Each act stimulates my emotions and leads me to explore my humanity.

This is a journey that goes beyond mere physical acts, seeking to understand the essence of humanity, the depths of emotion, and the intersection of life and death.

The act of asphyxiation is a form of art that explores my emotions and the complexity of human emotions.

It goes beyond the moral boundaries defined by society, understanding and sharing the depth of emotion, and embracing human fragility and strength.

My journey is an internal exploration as an artist of emotion, revealing the profound beauty of human emotion.

- Justifying Purpose: Between the Loss of Life and Beauty -

In the depths of human existence, the moment life is lost—death—casts a shadow as dark as night.

It is our final boundary, an incomprehensible realm of the unknown.

Yet, as I gaze into this abyss, I see the loss of life not as a mere end, but as a source of beauty found deep within the core of human existence.

My actions are a form of art that transcends life and its conclusion, a profound exploration to understand the essence of life.

In communion with death, each act becomes a journey to explore the depths of the human soul.

The moment breath ceases, the cries emerging from pain and struggle reveal the preciousness of life and the fragility of existence.

These moments provide an opportunity to explore true beauty beyond the limits of life.

This is not about mere survival or the prolongation of life; it is a journey to find answers to fundamental questions about life.

My choice of asphyxiation as an art form is not born out of fear or hatred of death.

Rather, it stems from a desire to discover the true beauty of humanity, especially in its most vulnerable and desperate moments.

In the moment the soul departs, I engage in communion with it, exploring the deepest realms of human existence.

This journey is not about fearing or avoiding the cessation of breath, but about seeking the most genuine meaning of life through that experience.

The fact that breath stops forever is not an end but an inevitable experience necessary to understand the depths of the human spirit.

Throughout life’s journey, we constantly cross the boundaries between life and death.

On this delicate line, the beauty of existence is revealed most profoundly.

The path I have chosen is to capture the most dramatic and vivid moments at this boundary.

Through the ultimate moment when everything ceases, I aim to explore the infinite value and fragility of life.

The moment of death is intense.

The last breath, the final struggle, the final gaze—all are explosive expressions of emotion.

These moments are the ultimate artistic representations of life’s transience and beauty.

My actions are about exploring the deepest realms of the human spirit through these moments.

Leading the subject to the edge is not about making them die, but about allowing them to experience the extreme moments of existence.

These moments provide extreme insights into the essence of life.

By experiencing the cessation of breath and heartbeat, we can deepen our understanding of the preciousness and beauty of life.

Thus, my actions are not aimed at death itself, but at exploring the depth of life and its value through the experience of losing it.

My actions are an artistic expression that navigates the balance between the wonder of life and the inevitability of death.

This exploration is a solitary journey.

Along this journey, I constantly question the essence of existence, explore the fundamental meaning of life, and experience the pure beauty that is revealed in the moments when breath stops.

The experience with the woman who had performed asphyxiation scenes was not a mere incident.

It was a journey of exploring the extreme emotions of humanity and discovering the true beauty that blossoms within.

Watching her final moments, I witnessed the flame of life burning in her pain and despair.

The intense beauty of that moment transcended mere fear, revealing the wonder of life itself.

Through the final image of life, I was able to understand the essence of life more deeply.

The pain and desperation she showed in her final moments were not just physical; they were a revelation of her very existence.

In that moment, her struggle, her gaze, and her final breath were the purest form of beauty to me.

It was a reminder of the essence of life that we often fail to perceive.

This experience led me to realize that life and death exist on a continuum.

Death is not merely the end of life but a process where new beauty and meaning can be discovered.

In her pain, I saw the intensity of life, and the beauty of that moment became the pinnacle of my artistic exploration.

Understanding the beauty of life through the act of losing it is deeply connected to the reason for our existence.

We all face death eventually, but in that process, we can discover the true meaning of life.

Through her final moments, I realized how precious our existence is, and I was able to draw new artistic inspiration from it.

I invite you to reflect on the essence of life and existence through this experience.

In our daily lives, we often forget the preciousness of life, but through the phenomenon of life fading away, we can discover its true beauty.

The beauty that blossomed from her pain and despair reveals fundamental human emotions that we can all understand and empathize with.

This experience is not merely about violence but a process of deep reflection on life and existence.

Her dedication helped us rediscover the beauty of life, and through it, we can cherish our existence even more.

Her final moments were more intense and beautiful than any artwork, and through that moment, we discover the true meaning of life.

Through the moment when breath stops forever, I seek to reveal the depth of life.

Through this extreme experience, we can contemplate the essence of life more deeply and understand the beauty of existence more intricately.

This is the core of my journey—exploring the profound beauty of human existence at the boundary where life departs.

- Balancing Social Norms and Personal Truth: A Search for Harmony -

Human society is composed of various norms and expectations.

These norms play a crucial role in maintaining community and creating order.

However, at times, there can be a disconnect between an individual's deep beliefs and these societal expectations.

This gap is particularly pronounced in the realm of art and creativity.

My story begins at this point of contrast.

Social morality is an invisible wall that surrounds us—a collection of rules and principles that define how we should act.

This wall often provides a safe and predictable boundary.

Yet, personal truth often seeks to transcend these boundaries.

My truth stems from a profound exploration of the essence of life and death.

It challenges conventional social morality and often raises uncomfortable questions.

My actions may appear unpleasant and abnormal to most people.

However, these acts are my way of capturing the dramatic moments of life.

They are important emotional and artistic expressions for me, emphasizing the fragility of life and exploring its fundamental value in the moment of death.

The gap between personal truth and social norms is a complex and multifaceted issue.

My actions may go against social norms, but they are my genuine response to the beauty of life that I have discovered.

This personal truth stands in opposition to social morality but is rooted in my deep understanding and respect for life.

My journey explores the tense balance between social norms and personal beliefs.

It reveals the complexity of the human spirit and discovers artistic beauty in life’s extreme moments.

My actions pose uncomfortable questions, challenge conventional thinking, and aim to provide a new understanding of existence.

Human existence is a complex stage that sometimes oscillates between dark madness and pure beauty.

My journey has been an exploration of these extremes, and now, it may have reached its endpoint.

Throughout this path, I have experienced countless inner conflicts.

My actions were against social norms, but they originated from my deep exploration of human emotions and the essence of existence.

Each moment of asphyxiation revealed the beauty of existence through extreme situations of life.

The path I chose, although socially unacceptable, was a deep reflection of my belief in understanding human life, death, and the essence of existence.

My actions were not mere expressions of madness but an exploration of the beauty and nature of humanity that emerges in life's extreme conditions.

However, now, looking back at it all, I face the consequences of the path I chose.

I acknowledge that my actions are socially unacceptable and deeply reflect on any pain and suffering caused as a result.

While the exploration of human emotions and existence holds intrinsic value, it cannot be justified if it results in harm and damage.

I have come this far under the belief that my artistic acts ultimately serve the happiness of women and do not harm them.

Having conducted many asphyxiation art sessions with numerous women, I feel my journey is nearing its end.

Ultimately, I will accept society's judgment and take responsibility for my actions.

This final confession reflects my true emotions and the story of a person who lost their way between life and death, beauty and madness.

My story encapsulates the clash between social norms and personal beliefs, the inner turmoil and conflicts that arise in the process of exploring human nature.

The path I walked demands deep reflection and understanding, marking the beginning of another journey that explores the complex psychology of humans and the duality of existence.