TDH Vol. 1 pt. 31

“Alright, here’s the plan,” Fane said, holding me up in front of his face. He had both of his hands underneath my front legs, leaving the rest of me to dangle in the air.

But if it was a plan to get sponsored by that woman, I was happy to let him uncomfortably dangle me in the air.

“I’ll do the talking, you do the… being cute. Got it? Honestly, I probably don’t even have to do anything. All you have to do is be as cute as possible and she should be crazy for you. Trust me.”

I nodded and mentally prepared myself to be as cute as possible.

Getting sponsored was too big of a deal to pass up.

Whenever I heard the others talk about sponsors, they made it sound like one of the most important things to getting out of the dungeon alive. Only one man ever made it through the dungeon without a sponsor, supposedly. Everybody else has sponsors to help them out.

Basically, sponsors were those with connections to the criminals or wealthy merchants who wanted to use the criminals as live advertisement opportunities. The more money a sponsor spent, the more equipment and special services they were allowed to provide their sponsored criminals with. That meant anything from being given armor and weapons to start every attempt at the dungeon with to being given an actual bedroom to sleep in and more.

Some were even allowed outside of the prison area to go walk through the city. After all, we still had those collars around our necks and there was no way of getting rid of them without permission. We could be killed at any moment.

I completely forgot about my collar while fighting against Cheese. Something like grabbing the observation orb and using it as a weapon could have been seen as misbehaving… but, fortunately, they didn’t mind it happening.

I would probably be dead if they did.

“Alright. You ready?” Fane asked me.

I nodded again, so he opened the door to the “interview” room and took us in.

The woman he was familiar with was already sitting on the other side of the table in the room, and there were two chairs for us on our side. Not that we’d need both of them. Fane placed me on the table and took one seat for himself.

“Catch any butterflies lately?” Fane asked right away.

What… what kind of question is that? Does she have a butterfly catching hobby or something?

To answer his question, she placed her hand on the table to drop some sort of… device on it. It was a small device seeing as how it could fit in her petite hand, and it looked mechanical. It reminded me of the observation orb.

“I have,” she answered before picking the object back up and taking her hand under the table. Her hands were both empty the next time they rested atop the table.

“Not surprising. There are butterflies all over this place,” Fane replied.

“Tell me about this companion of yours.”

“If you are asking if he is trustworthy—well, I have no idea. Barely know him. Can’t exactly hold a conversation with him. But, let me tell you. He is great at listening.”

The woman sighed and placed a hand over her face. “Well, with the butterflies around, it is not as if it matters. What about those?” She pointed at our necks.

“Ah, these? Don’t believe so. Tested it out before and never had a problem.”

“I see. Good.”

I felt like I was only hearing half of the conversation. They were clearly talking to and understand each other, but I had no idea what they were talking about.

Changing the subject, Fane stretched his arms out above his head before leaning over the table. “So, ready to sponsor me and help me get out of here?”

“Has the chocolate been melted?” she asked.

Chocolate? Melting? What does melting chocolate have to do with anything?

“Unfortunately, it might be a bit too frozen to melt. Tried everything to melt it, but it just wouldn’t go,” Fane answered.

“I feared such would be the case,” the woman before sighing again. “It was worth a try at least.”

“But, my queen, just because I might not have been able to melt the chocolate does not mean that somebody else in here might not be able to.”

“What are you implying?”

“I’m implying this guy.” Fane pressed his hand against my rear to push me across the table closer to her. “Chocolate doesn’t agree with me too much. Can barely even tolerate me for some reason. But this little guy seems to be a favorite of chocolate. If anybody is going to melt it, it’s him.”

The woman raised an eyebrow at me. “Interesting. Unfortunately, that would require bringing somebody else into our world. While I would not mind helping him with his escape from this cruel place, I have no interest in dragging somebody else into our issues.”

“I figured you would say that.”

“We will figure something else out… we have to.”

“I could always try melting the chocolate a bit more. The ladies here love me, so I should be fine not getting voted out or anything. Besides, I might have a few techniques I haven’t tried yet to heat it up.”

“May as well until we come up with a more promising plan.”

“Oh, right. I take it things with the chocolate up north didn’t turn out any better?”

The woman shook her head.

“Well, we shouldn’t be too surprised. We knew that the chances of acquiring the two best chocolates in the world were next to impossibly low.”

“He asked me to join his harem.”

“Wait, what now?”

“The northern chocolate, I mean. It had… great interest in me, but not in melting.”

Fane placed a hand over his mouth to try and hold back his laughter, but he once again proved how horrible he was at that. “Oh… oh, I wish I was there to see that.”

“If there has ever been a chocolate worthy of having its flavor called bold… it would be that northern chocolate.”

“You just gave me an idea. The chocolate down here hates that northern chocolate. Very competitive. I might be able to use you as a bargaining chip.”

Fane sounded happy with his idea, but…

The woman across from us looked disappointed. Maybe even a little sad.

“I cannot stand the state of this world, Fane,” she said. “If they were good then they would not need me used as a chip. They should want to help of their own will.”

Fane crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back in his chair. “Nobody is that selfless. Everybody has their own issues to take care of, and we’re unknown nobodies to them. They have no reason to care about our issues.”

“Then they are selfish.”

“Everybody is. Me, you, the little guy here—we’re all selfish. You might be the most selfish of us all for expecting others to help you without getting anything in return.”

“I… I know.”

Fane sighed and leaned forward again. “What am I going to do with you?”

“Continue annoying me, most likely.”

“Hey now, my ego has already been deflated. Let’s not deflate it any further.”

“Do not act like you dislike it.”

“I really have missed this. Then again, it’s also been nice having my ego stroked every day. You know how many women have tried to sponsor me before? Some of them even had husbands.”

“My insults are about to become legitimate rather than teasing. Do you have anything else to say?”

“Do you know how to sponsor somebody?”

“They explained it to me. There is a registrar I must talk to who I submit my choices and payment to.”

“Right. So just go talk to them and give them our numbers. There should be a book there with our pictures and latest numbers.”

“Very well. You are dismissed now.”

“Want me to leave you alone with the little guy?”

“… yes.”

“Alright. Don’t forget to register the sponsorship once you’re done. I’ll go get back to brainstorming ideas for melting that chocolate. I have a few ideas I think might work.”

The woman nodded, prompting Fane to leave the room and close the door behind him.

And so… I was left in the room with the most beautiful woman I ever saw, and I had no idea what to do. That was why I froze.

Fane made it sound like we were going to be partners or something. He’d talk and I’d be cute. I thought we were going to work together. Instead, he did all the talking while I just stood around listening to them talk about things that I couldn’t even understand.

It was obvious that the chocolate they were talking about wasn’t really chocolate. It was some kind of code for something that they were careful not to call by its real name. But without knowing what the code stood for, I had no idea what they were talking about. It could have meant anything, really.

Though I was able to piece together that it sounded like Fane was in here on purpose. That meant this “chocolate” had to be somewhere in the prison or the dungeon. That narrowed it down, and I might have been able to figure out what it was… if it wasn’t for now being alone with a beautiful woman as she stared at me.

“Can… you understand me?” she asked.

It took all of my strength just to make myself nod.

“I see. He said you were—are… a Chosen, yes?”

Another nod.

She took a deep breath. “It… it is alright if you say no, so please do not feel pressured. That being said, I would like to ask you… if it is alright to pet you.”

I blinked a few times when I heard that.

Maybe it was the blinking that cleared my vision.

Or maybe it was what she asked that destroyed the royal illusion that she presented to me.

But when I looked at her now… that older, mature demeanor was gone.

Even so, I nodded.

She looked hesitant, but she reached her hand out toward me. Ever so slowly, her hand inched closer and closer to my head until it was just above it.

One more deep breath was all that it took for her to plant her hand against my head.

And the instant she did, she smiled. It wasn’t just a quick smile that she tried to hide, either. It was a relaxed, soft smile that was there to stay. A sigh that was just as soft as her smile left her lips as she stroked her hand through my fur until her fingers reached the back of my neck.

Elanah was gentle, but this woman’s touch was graceful. Even the way that she petted me felt as proper as she looked.

“This takes me back,” the woman said, even speaking in a gentle tone now. “I used to have a pet like you. A soul beast. He was even smaller than you at the time. I never learned how he gained his soul, but I knew that he only wanted the comfort of a home. He would sit on my lap and I would pet him just like this. I was only a little girl at the time… and here I believed I would never remember something from so long ago so vividly.”

We look the same age. Well, if I had my original body, we’d look the same age. Is it that hard to remember something from childhood? Not to take away from your story or anything…

I probably shouldn’t have been questioning the finer details while I was being petted by the most beautiful woman in existence, but that stuck out to me. Maybe it was because I never had a problem remembering things like that and couldn’t relate to others when they failed to remember such things.

“Would it be alright if I place you on my lap?” she asked.

I froze again.

She wanted…

To place me…

On her lap.

On her thighs.

I was about to enjoy potentially the best thighs in all of existence.

“I take it by the wagging of your tail that it is alright?” she asked.

I didn’t even notice my tail was wagging. That was embarrassing and made me feel even more frozen.

When I was finally able to nod my head, it only came out in shaky increments.

“Here,” she said, setting me on top of her thick, soft, warm, perfect lap.

I was officially dead.

I must have been to be experiencing what I was. I must have died for good and had to be in some sort of strange dream. That’s what people always said happened after death, anyways. Souls had dreams while waiting to be reincarnated, supposedly. This had to be one of those dreams.

“This is nice,” she said, stroking her hand from the top of my head all the way to the base of my tail over and over. “If you accept my sponsorship… would you mind if we do this? I will even pay so that we may have a private place to ourselves. All I ask is that you allow me to pet you until you no longer need my sponsorship.”

I’d be happy to let you pet me even after that.

As relaxed as she might have sounded, I couldn’t help but to feel like she also sounded… sad. I wanted to make her feel better. The only way I could think of to do that was to turn my head and lick her hand the next time it went over my head.

That made her smile even more.

“Careful, boy,” she said in a low, almost sultry tone. “Do not excite me in such a place.”

Ex—huh? Wha—what?

“Even if your intent was innocent, mine will not be so.”

Huh? What—what are you even talking about? All I did was lick your hand! I wanted to cheer you up! Then again… you don’t sound sad now. Instead, you sound… you’re kind of reminding me of—

“Woofen!” Elanah shouted, throwing open the door to the room. “I heard you’re in here!”

“Hey! Watch it!” one of the guards outside said, grabbing onto her shoulder.

What I saw next was horrifying. Truly, genuinely horrifying. Elanah stood perfectly still and quiet… as she slowly turned her head to look at the guard who grabbed her with pure, murderous intent in her eyes.

I never saw somebody look so terrifying.

The guard even let go of her shoulder. “You can’t… you can’t interrupt meetings with sponsors, unless you’re invited,” he said.

“My fated is in there. I’m invited,” Elanah said.

The guard looked past Elanah to look at the woman whose lap I was on instead, and she said, “It is fine. She is welcome to come in.”

The guard sighed and nodded, closing the door once Elanah was inside.

That murderous intent in Elanah’s eyes remained as she noticed me on another woman’s lap.

I’m scared.