Rabbit-Spider

No one said that this Patreon campaign had to pertain exclusively to Zebra Girl, right?  Shoot, my name's on the marquee too.

So, I rarely participate in memes, but this #Spidersona thing is right up  my alley.  Into the Spider-verse was great, and I’ve loved Spider-Man  all my life!  Maybe the best Halloween costume I ever wore was a  Spider-Man outfit that my mother made for me by upgrading a  store-brought suit with her superlative sewing skills.  Now that it’s a  fad, who am I to miss a chance to claim a pocket dimension of my own?   One in which I too became an amazing spider-themed superhero!

Universe  1041362:  Attending a scientific demonstration, humble cartoonist  Joseph B. Parker was bitten by a radioactive rabbit that had been bitten  by a radioactive spider!  Gaining the abilities of both animals (to  varying degrees), he assumed the identity of the Remarkable  Rabbit-Spider!

Though granted great power and proportional  responsibility, it should be noted that Joe’s not nearly as capable as  conventional Parkers.  His lack of scientific acumen requires him to  rely on others to develop and maintain his equipment and strategies.   He’s terrible at following directions, which tends to frustrate his  SHIELD handlers.  His spider-powers are also slightly weaker than most  other spider-people’s, transferred as they were through a secondary  medium.

However, he also gained rabbit-powers to boot!  His  enhanced hearing and olfactory talents compliment his spider-sense  immeasurably, his general soft fluffiness helps him to avoid serious  injury, and his knack for jumping puts other heroes to shame.  Also, his  unique appearance has made him relatively popular in his neighborhood.   His visits to the child patients in local hospitals have become an  Easter tradition.  After all, everybody loves a rabbit.

Unless  they’re super villains, that is!  In the years since Joe’s  transformation there has been an outbreak of “Chimeras” taking on the  combined traits of several other animals, and some are willing to use  their powers for personal gain!  So far he’s had to halt the  machinations of the shape-shifting Mimic Octopus, the mercenary Sable  Cat, the dreadful Scorpionfly, the mighty Rhinoceros Beetle, and the  wily Lizard Buzzard!  Many of whom seem to be operating at the behest of  a hidden crime lord called the Kingfisher.

Joe’s made his own  inquiries, but his investigation is hampered by his general lack of  focus and forgetfulness.  Thankfully, his obsessive-compulsive disorder  occasionally allows him to provide insight while his aforementioned  handlers manage the bulk of the investigation.  In the meantime,  Rabbit-Spider continues his surprisingly successful campaign to make the  world a friendlier place!

Quote:  “Pink?  Are you blind?? This is purple!”