Meet your new college roomie, big fella.
Added 2023-11-17 11:00:07 +0000 UTC
"Hey there, big guy. I'm Trent. Looks like we're gonna be roomies, huh? You need a hand with your stuff? Whoa, you gotta shitload of clothes, big fella. Look at all these Ts, man. As you can see, shirts don't figure a lot in my wardrobe. No point busting your ass in the gym if no one can appreciate the results, am I right? Nah, I'm pretty much shirtless most of the time - is that gonna bother you? Cool, cool. Well, go ahead and get settled in. It's weird: in your picture you looked kinda normal-sized. Is that an okay thing to say? Yeah, I mean, what the hell can you guess from a face pic, right? But . . . um, wow. I had no idea you were this heavy. What are you, like 400 lbs? 438?? Jesus man, you are fucking HUGE! What a fucking beast! No man, I fucking love it. I mean, if you're gonna be fat, be fucking enormous, yeah? Be the fattest motherfucker you can be, dough boy. I mean, now that you've put all your shit down I can really see just how fucking big you are. Look at that fucking gut, man! Jesus, you are fat. I mean, you're fucking immense. Massive, soft belly. Huge fucking tits there too, right? Mmm-mh, such a fat fucking piggy, that's so sick. Everyone's gonna be like 'why is Trent rooming with that fat load' and I'm gonna be bringing you up food from the cafeteria and fucking feeding you and shit. Fuck, my frat house has a donut challenge every year with one of our big rivals, and we never win. But holy crap are we gonna nail it this year. Wait until they get a load of you lumbering up to the podium, you fat fuck. Oh, this is awesome. I gotta get a video. Yo, take your shirt off, fat boy. That's it. Now grab two big handfuls of flab and jiggle all that lard. Push your belly all the way out. That's it, fatty. Oh my Christ, you are fucking massive. Think how fucking fat you're gonna be by the end of the semester. Freshman 15 my ass - more like Freshman 100."
Comments
Thanks, George!
Matt
2023-11-17 13:24:07 +0000 UTCDamn you’re on a roll with these, I really like this one too
George Gundelach
2023-11-17 12:44:11 +0000 UTC
