The Reincarnation of Alysara. Chapter 7

AN: I am Back! Sorry for the hiatus, I needed to take some time to care for my mental health. Thank you all for your support and concern. I hope to earn your trust back eventually by writing the best version of TROA as I can and completing the first book for Alysara.

AN2: Got some editing suggestions? Suggest it on the Google Docs here:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1tZa5SsLZQ6QuYYsBUVjmxndJcri-LsG__bLW59HoWOg/edit?usp=sharing

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An explosion of impressions of colors fills my perception. My previous mana sense, which could only convey my surroundings using extremely basic forms of information such as depth and density, paled in comparison. 

Sure, there were not that many colors, and I could still barely sense five meters in front of me, but…! Compared to how I saw the world before—dull and lifeless—at least now, those same suffocating five meters would be much more detailed and interesting!

In truth, what I picked up through my mana senses could definitely not be described as “color.” It’s almost like the “colors” I am feeling are those impressions, yet my mind is interpreting them visually as well as emotionally. Air mana feels whimsical, while earth mana feels stubborn and stalwart, and even stranger is that mana appears that way to me. I don't really know how else to rationalize or describe this feeling and color of mana.

Regardless, with this further enhancement of my senses, it’s as if I’ve stepped into the light again. Things previously unseen—simply because they were touching or part of the same object—stand in sharp contrast as their true nature is revealed under the light of color. If I were to describe it another way, it’s like… going from eating and not tasting to now being able to fully enjoy the taste and smell of food. It’s gone from merely subsisting to thriving!

Overwhelmed by the experience, I feel tears gathering in the corner of my eyes. It’s like I regained a piece of myself that I lost. I bask in the moment, to feel all the new sensations and process everything. 

As I give myself a moment to calm down to analyze the new sensations, my initial high starts to simmer down a little as I begin to realize some of the Skill’s shortcomings. That is, although there are multiple different “colors”—exactly eight to be precise—that's really kind of… it. There are no in-between colors, and there isn't any value or shading either. Just one color for each element—plus the depth and density that was there previously—and that's it. It’s like the entire world is drawn by a child using only eight pigments.

Still, I don’t let this ruin my mood. On the contrary, I grow even more excited because I am sure that if I can improve my Skill again, I may eventually be able to see the shade of mana too!

To my surprise earth mana isn’t just in the ground, but it’s all around me. In the air, in the water; it is everywhere! Not just earth mana but all mana. So far, I can identify earth, water, and air mana, but there are other types that I have not yet figured out, although I can make a guess. The bonfire has two types of mana that are more present than others. One feels like a burning passion, and the other feels like joyous shining, so I think those are fire and light mana.

It will take some time before I can learn everything new, but with excitement and joy filling my heart, I am more motivated than ever to master my mana sense! 

I end up spending the rest of the Lojyo, and well into the next day, studying the types of elements. I can’t fall asleep anyway with my buzzing desire for knowledge; however, staying up all night has made me very tired and sluggish. So when Mom comes in to help teach me how to walk, I am nearly falling asleep. Mom tries to ask me a question, but my half-asleep mind is completely elsewhere. Suddenly, I am in an unfamiliar scene.

I remember sweating under a hot, beating sun, feeling like I was in a fryer. I was covered in itchy sand and dirt, digging for something…? Is it a pot? A bone? The memory isn’t clear, but I was excited despite the heat and filth. It was my first time discovering something… old.

“Aly!”

I feel gravity suddenly reverse, but realize I am being picked up, tearing me away from my reminiscence. Mom’s heart pounds as she holds me to her chest and carries me out of the house in a hurry.

“Mom͞áwá?” I ask, confused as to what is happening.

Mom doesn’t answer, too focused and going somewhere. But as we enter the healer’s house, suddenly, everything makes sense. I wasn’t answering Mom, so she thought that there was something wrong with me.

“Mom͞áwá! Ku… Ku…” I look for the right word, but I realize I don’t know how to say I am fine. I fight back the surge of worthlessness from my failure to communicate. “O̅?” I ask. I know it isn’t the right word, the word I used means ‘bright’, but I have no other way of telling her that I am fine.

“O̅?” Mom repeats, confusion clear on her face as she tilts her head and twitches her right ear.

“U͟ns̤ṳ unsu,” I try to explain. I said ‘didn’t speak, now speak’ and I hope mom understands that I’m not ill.

Mom frowns and says something I don’t understand before speaking with the healer. 

The healer places her hand on my head and activates a spell. As a wave of earth mana washes over me, my ears twitch upwards in surprise. They stay like this for several long seconds before slowly lowering back down again—an inexplicable sense of confusion washing over me.

Strange… I’m not really sure what I was expecting—but for some reason, I couldn’t help but feel like the mana that the healer’s spell used was not what I expected. Though I’m unsure why…

Ignoring my outburst, the healer delivers what I presume to be a diagnosis with a shrug, making Mom blush a little, but she sighs with relief regardless. Mom picks me up and we return home. I make sure not to worry Mom and Dad if I can help it to avoid any more misunderstandings. 

My enthusiasm for studying mana slowly dies down over the next couple of seasons as my progress begins to plateau. I make no new breakthroughs, and my level even stops rising after level twenty-five. What’s worse is that I don’t even know why this is happening!

I considered asking my parents about how to improve my Skills, but the moment I pondered how to ask the question, my mind went completely blank. Um, perhaps I’ll put a bit more effort into learning language again—not being able to resolve my curiosity is no good. In the meantime, I’ll still see if I can figure this whole level thing out on my own.

Fortunately, I can walk on my own now, even if I still stumble a bit, and that has kept me from depression since I am still accomplishing something.

Before long, I realize the existence of this thing called a “season”: a period of time where one element is more prominent than the others. Not only is it stronger and more abundant, but there are also these strange “storms” every once in a while that cause all kinds of unusual things to happen, such as wind blowing despite being in a closed building.

Also, I was born during Light season, which is right before Fire season. Now it is near the end of Dark season and the beginning of Ice season. Already, I can feel the cold in the air, as the nexus is being flooded with ice mana.

The ice mana has a repulsion effect with the fire mana, making the cold worse as the ice mana not only cools things down but also removes the heating fire mana. Ice attracts and is attracted by dark mana, and considering we’ve been in the dark season, I wonder if this push and pull of mana determines the weather cycle.

I should ask. 

“Mom͞árá, why cold?”

Originally, I wanted to ask a more detailed question, but I don’t know how to say ‘season.’ 

“Cold? It’s getting close to Esay” Mom says as she pats my head. She does so whenever I ask a question, probably to encourage me to speak, but it does feel nice when she does that. It wasn't just because I could steal her warmth in these cold times.

Es means time, and ay means Ice mana… was it really that easy? I thought for sure tl would be thrown in there or something, I never know when to use that.

“Wait here” Mom stands up and leaves, coming back with a carved, circular wooden tablet. She doesn’t show it to me, since I can’t see it, but I can sense the mana in it and make out its shape.

It depicts a ring with eight circles surrounding a large circle in its center.

“There are eight Moons, Little Aly. Each one brings a season, and is the season of Ice, that’s why it’s cold.” Mom explains. 

“So Moons bring… uh… es… esru?” If esay means ‘time of ice mana’ then to talk about seasons in general it should be esru, ‘time of mana’.

Mom nods. “Yes, each moon grows bigger and moves across the sky faster until the zenith of their season, at which they start to slow and shrink to let another moon grow and dance with the Mother World.”

“Dance?” I tilt my head.

“Yes. We have a poem to describe the moons as they entwine with the Mother world. They each dance in the sky, taking turns to partner with Mother World.
“The First to Dance was the Light Moon, Lunato.
“She drew a canopy of dazzling light that danced in the skies,
“The pillars that broke the clouds signaled the awakening of all that lies,
“It was the time for, paintings, carvings, and many more,
“She entertained many, great and small alike without bore,
“Lunato is the greatest artist of all,
“And she inspires everyone without stall.

“Second is the Fire Moon, Fynato.
“She brought warmth and life, with a passionate dance,
“She inspired movement and battle with an unparalleled stance,
“The flames crack and roar, and sang a song of fervor,
“They sway and swirl, and many waited to see what’s in store,
“Fynato is the grandest dancer,
“And the fiercest battle warrior,

Third is the Wind Moon, Wunato.
“She sang with endless breath, for her winds are always fresh,
“Her touch was gentle, and made the heat less,
“She blew her flute and strung her instruments,
“And sought to master them all without incident,
“Wunato is a musician unparalleled,
“A title she had always held.

“Fourth is the Water Moon, Yanato.
“She dances like the waves and summons the cleansing rains,
“For she bathes everybody after a hard day’s pains,
“She sways to rival flame, and encourage friendly competition,
“She aims to be at the top, so she can teach a lesson,
“Yanato is a dancer of greatness and wisdom,
“For every fall, is a drop of determination.

“Fifth is the Dark Moon, Unato.
“She draws with darkness and painted the starry sky,
“She hummed and stringed, to bring sleep with a lullaby,
“The darkness consumed all, a jealousy crime,
“Banished from the heavens for all of time,
“Unato is the arist unseen,
“For her punishment is unbeing.

“Sixth is the Ice Moon, Aynato.
“She swung her crescent and froze the land,
“To protect from monsters was planned,
“Her howling frost song bites all,
“For the weakness must cull,
“Aynato is the singing protector,
“And merciless cold bringer.

“Seventh is the Earth Moon, Tenato.
“She wrote a story of a bud who grew into a tree,
“For she desired a fruit for the beings to be,
“She told a epic of the land and forest,
“A garden tall and grand and vast,
“Tenato is the greatest storyteller,
“An entertainer for the imaginative dreamer.

“And last is the Lightning Moon, Zynato.
“She drummed light and thunder, a flash of terror and awe,
“To scare away the danger, and give the monsters stall,
“She beat her drum that reverberated in our chest,
“An energizing war cry that allowed our best,
“Zynato is the inspiring minstrel,
“The electric master instrumental.”

“I… uh… know most? Understand words, but words in weird places?” I did know a surprising amount of words, but the style of the poem changed the rules and made it needlessly confusing.

“That’s alright,” Mom pats my head, “I’ll tell you the poem again when you’re older.”

“What Unato do? Why she punished?” I ask.

“Unato is the one to put everybody to sleep but she grew jealous since nobody could see her if they sleep, so she shone so dark she cast Mother World and everybody in darkness, a darkness so completely and holistically dark even Lunato’s light could not reach Mother World. To disrupt the eternal dance between Mother World and her daughter moons was a great crime, and so Mother World banished Unato from the heavens. As punishment, Unato must do her duty hidden so no one can see her. However, Unato rages against Mother World in a desperate desire to be seen and admired, so every one thousand years Unato breaks free from her imprisonment and returns for a single day, bathing Mother World in darkness again before being banished once more.” 

So Unato, the dark moon, can’t be seen, but her season still arrives? But isn’t the night sky black? You can’t see black on black, right? 

“Unato black, night sky black, no see is… correct?” I ask, struggling to form the right words.

“That is different,” Mom replies. “Unato is there but unable to be seen. Unato’s darkness is more black than night. People can see the darker black of the moon.”

I don’t know how one can get darker than the absence of light, but I guess there is dark light? That would make sense when Mom said Unato ‘shone’, but it feels like my memories expected something else again.

I wonder what the cause of this story is? Surely the world and moons aren’t really alive… or maybe they are? Magic is real, after all.

As time passes, I quickly realize that I am not ready for the ice season.

“Mom͞árá, I cold,” I say, shivering so hard my tail is practically vibrating.

“Let's get you closer to the fireplace, then. But don’t get too close to the warmth, alright, it can burn you,” Mom says as she layers more blankets on me and scoots me closer to the fireplace. “It’s still early ice season, so it’s going to get a lot colder, and a blizzard will be colder still.”

I don’t know how I am going to survive winter, I swear I’ll freeze to death!

Fortunately, Dad knows fire magic and is able to keep me warm. He even stopped going to work, although I learned that was because it’s too cold to work, so everybody stays at home. Baths need people to heat the water, but once the water froze over, we got a bathtub… well, for me it was, for my parents it was a bucket for bath sponges. 

As the season got even colder, Mom and Dad rented a special blanket made out of fire mana! The mana is literally weaved into fabric! I overheard Mom worrying about the price one night, but Dad said that someone had the innovative idea of renting it out for a lot cheaper, which seemed to have calmed Mom down. Meanwhile, I was ecstatic! Not only was I mostly warm now, but I got an object of study! Maybe now I can get another breakthrough in my stagnant skill growth!

However, before I could start, Mom and Dad took me outside. Ice mana saturated snow relentlessly drifts down in huge flakes and coats the ground with so much snow that it goes up to Dad’s knees!

Not many people are out and about—way too cold for that—so the only other people are those who hurry to their destination, whatever that may be.

As opposed to the rest of the year, there’s not a single sound other than the crunching of snow beneath Mom and Dad's feet as they walk to the edge of the village.

“Hear this Little Aly?” Dad says, ‘showing’ me the frozen sea. “It’s so quiet. Even the whole sea is frozen over, so there are no waves. We could walk to the next village if we wanted.”

I feel a strange… connection? It’s as if the serenity and peace is resonating with me. Not like Myrou's presence, it’s distinctly different. It’s like I can feel the beauty of the wintery landscape, the way the snow sparkles in the light, the feeling of serene calm of the world.

I can feel something within me strengthen, I don’t know what, but the longer I am in this place the more… vigor?—That's not the right word—the more… beauty I feel within myself? That doesn’t make any sense, but it feels like that. It’s as if the strange, holistic concept of beauty is building within me.

Mom and Dad stand there with me bundled in a fire mana blanket for several more minutes before getting too cold, and we have to return home. I wanted to stay longer, but the cold is just too brutal.

The next day, a blizzard arrives, a storm of ice mana that made the previous day seem balmy. The ice mana rips through everything with such intensity that even the repulsive force of the fire mana did little to keep away the ice mana. Fortunately, Dad had fire magic, and as he touched me and Mom, a flood of fire mana entered our bodies and we warmed up significantly. The storm is relentless, though, and chips away at the fire mana, stripping it out of our bodies so Dad has to keep reapplying his magic.

The blizzard only lasted a few hours, but it was the worst few hours of my life. If it weren't for Dad, we would have surely died!

The other seasons had storms too, but how can a darkness storm hurt me? A water storm brought a lot of water—well, more like a near flood—but it didn’t have much impact on us. A wind storm shook the house a few times, but that was it. A fire storm made us sweat, but it wasn’t lethal!

This isn’t the last blizzard of the season, but just like the first, we survived the others. Eventually, the temperature warmed up as earth mana started flowing through the Nexus at increased volume, signifying the end of ice season. Soon, everything returned to normal, and it was as if ice season never happened. For me, it was the worst season of my life, but for everyone else? They’ve been through it many times. I wonder how many times I have to go through that cold before it’s just another season for me.

Earth season is mostly uneventful except that I got one more level in my [Sense Mana Elements] Skill, bringing it to level twenty-six. Seasons of constant use, and one level is all it got me. I know my maximum level is forty, but how do I even reach level forty?!

I still don’t know the syllable for Skills, or level, or much related to Skills, so how am I going to ask about it? Maybe I’ll say something along the lines of ‘How I do better?’ Hmm, that is confusing, especially without context. Maybe ‘how I see mana better?’, but that doesn’t address the specifics of Skills and levels. I’ll just wait until I’ve mastered the language more and can better articulate what I want.

The next season is the lightning season, and according to Mom’s story, the last season of the year, so I’ll be one year old soon. It feels like I’ve been alive forever!

The Lightning season is characterized by near constant dark and stormy skies. There’s little wind and rain but the rumbling of far off thunder is contrasted by the occasional crack right above us.

One evening, as I sit on Dad’s lap while he talks with my aunt and her husband waiting on the dock for guests, I feel the strange sense of connection and holistic beauty building within me. It’s not the serene calm of winter, but the terrifying awe of the sky lighting up with an unmatched fury.

Somehow, I just know that the lightning bolt struck down like a pillar of light, a beautiful contrast to the dark clouds in the sky. Seconds later the rumble washes over us, reverberating in my chest. Dad and Aunty stopped talking for a moment to enjoy the scene.

I realize that beauty isn’t just about how something looks, it is about how something feels too. It isn’t about calm serenity either, but it can be about awe, wonder and even terror—not the fearful kind, but the kind that makes you feel small and awestruck.

Is this the blessing of beauty Myrou gave me? I don’t know, but it feels like whatever it is, it is getting stronger within me. Is it magic?! Is my magic related to beauty? Come to think of it, Dad only uses fire spells, and Mom only uses water spells. Does everyone have only one type? What is mine? I hope to find out soon.