Bryan - Felix's struggle with Anxiety Meds

During the pandemic, my girlfriend of 5 years and I broke up. Turns out, with us both working from home, we don’t like spending that much time together. The upside was that she moved in with her sister, and I got to keep the apartment. The downside was that I had put on a bit of relationship weight and needed to get back into fighting shape if I ever wanted to have sex again. So I put myself on a strict diet and forced myself to do a daily workout, including adding 20 pushups, 20 Squats, and 20 situps after every frustrating Zoom call with work, so I didn’t eat snacks and focused my energy on something positive.

It didn’t take as long as I expected before I was feeling good about myself again and feeling sick of the same old porn. I put myself on Tindr, and that didn’t get me anywhere. I had hooked up with guys a few times in my 4 years at NC State, but it had been 5 years since then. I told myself it was just a phase and really didn’t think much of it while in a relationship with a woman for so long. Now that I’m single, horny, and 27, almost 28, I decided I could check out Grindr.

First off, shout out to the designers of Grindr vs. the people behind Tinder. It’s like a menu of sex instead of a game of peek-a-boo. I sat down with a knuckle of scotch and got into some real dirty talk with some guys within a mile of my apartment.

Around 1 am, this one guy whose profile said he was 29, though he looked 22, with medium-length sandy blonde hair, kind of a sexy nerd, on the skinny side but fit, hit me up asking what I was into. I told him I wasn’t really sure, explaining my situation and how I hadn’t done anything with a guy since college and wasn’t sure what I wanted to do. He suggested we could just jerk off together. Adding that he didn’t want to have sex because his depression meds made it difficult for him to stay hard and that he had to balance it out with the little blue pills, which he didn’t want to take if I wasn’t 100% sure I wanted to bottom for him. At this point, a few knuckles deep in scotch and getting turned on by the idea of it, I kind of wanted to say yes, but I was too nervous and told him we should just jerk off.

He came over a half hour later.

We stripped down to underwear, me in some powder-blue Tommy boxer briefs, him in some black and white CK briefs with “CK’ patterned all over them. His bulge was impressive for a guy who wasn’t fully hard, so I was kind of glad we agreed just to jerk off.

I gave him my laptop to put porn on the bedroom TV. He picked a pretty basic video, but it was an hour-long compilation of guys fucking that progressively added more and more guys. It helped with my nerves, and when he reached over to grop my package, I went from soft to rock hard quicker than I had in years.

“Is this ok?” he asked, staring at my underwear.

“Yeah,” I nodded, unsure if I should reach over and massage him. He stuck his free hand into his underwear and started playing with his dick until it was hard, then he quickly yanked his briefs and boxers off, scooting up next to me so he could stroke both of us. It felt really good to have a strong hand on my cock, but I wasn’t getting there by having him jerk me off. I’m not 15 anymore, so hand jobs from other people don’t make me cum. Though his grip was better than my ex, without a doubt.

He got his bag and pulled out some lube, squirted some on his cock, and started stroking himself back to life after deflating pretty quickly. “Do you want some?” He asked.

“Oh, I don’t usually use lube to jerk off,” I admitted.

He grinned, one eyebrow up, “Never?”

I shrugged.

He smiled, then let some drip onto my dick and started stroking me. Holy shit, now his jerking me off felt so good I was quickly getting close to blowing my load. My heavy breathing and wiggling under his touch must have been a telltale sign for him because he pulled off my dick and dug out a little brown bottle, shook it, then uncapped it and put it under my nose.

“What’s that?” I frowned, the pungent fumes wafting up my nose.

He grinned, raising an eyebrow, “Poppers. You don’t know what poppers are?”

I smiled, shaking my head, “No, what is it?”

“It helps you relax, helps you to have a more powerful orgasm, too,” he offered me the bottle.

I felt like I was in for a penny, in for a pound at this point, so I took the bottle and gave it a whiff.

“No, you need to really take a deep hit,” he said, rolling towards me, his long dick snaking across my leg as he took the bottle back and showed me how to do it. He took a long, slow breath in, held it, breathed out, then another long, slow breath in on the other side of his nose and held it, passing me the bottle.

I followed his lead. The flammable scent hit me pretty hard. I did not like it, but the immediate rush of blood pumping through my body…that was doing something for me. “Shit,” I mumbled, feeling the room spinning for a minute, thinking I might black out until he got between my knees and started stroking my dick again. My legs straddled his thighs, feeling his semi-erect seven-inch cock laying along my balls as he stroked me.

“Do it again,” he chuckled, “The next one will really get you going,” he said confidently. So I did.

He kept stroking me for a while, getting me close to the edge a few times before having me take another hit of the poppers. This time, he pushed my legs up at the knee, “Are you cleaned out?”

I nodded, and he immediately dropped his mouth down to my ass hole, sucking and licking it without hesitation, and fuck me…it felt good. The poppers seemed to help loosen me up a bit because he was able to push his long tongue into my pucker and started licking my inner walls in a way I had never experienced before. “Oh shit, Felix, fuck,” I groaned and wiggled under his magical tongue.

I started feeling like I wanted to get fucked by him, but I remembered what he said about his meds and looked down his body to his dick which was aroused but not hard. I started stroking his hair, and he started moaning into my ass hole, adding more pleasure to an already fantastic rim job. “I have condoms,” I mumbled, “If you want to try and fuck,” I trailed off, feeling weird for even saying it.

He pulled his tongue from my ass and let my hips fall into his lap right on his thick chubbed dick. “Man, I wish. You’re so hot, but I didn’t bring the Viagra, and even if I did, it would take a while to kick in at this point,” he shrugged. Then he added lube to my hole and started using the tip of his semi to tease my hole.

“Mmm, that feels good,” I told him, reaching for my dick.

“Are you into frotting?” He asked.

“I don’t know,” I told him, not knowing what it was.

“Roll onto your stomach,” he instructed, putting more lube on his dick, then smearing it on my crack once I was on my stomach. “Me and my boyfriend do this, and I don’t usually cum, but it feels good for both of us,” he said, straddling my thighs and started rubbing his dick up and down my crack.

My ass instinctively came up a little to get more of his dick, but he just teased the head on my hole for a minute before laying on top of me, his rubbery dick between my slick cheeks, and he started grinding it on my hole. He wrapped his arms under my chest, holding me really tight as he humped my ass for a few minutes. Admittedly, it felt really good, and I started rocking my ass up at his dick with each thrust.

He was breathing heavily in my ear, that kind of breathing that you hear when someone is really working for the pleasure he’s getting and I could tell he was enjoying this way more than I was. After a few intense minutes, I swear I could feel him starting to get harder, but not so hard that he could put on a condom and fuck me, though the added stiffness was catching on my very horny hole and adding more pleasure to this frot session.

I felt the cold glass of the little brown bottle at my hip and reached for it. I took a deep hit, then another, arching my ass up as he humped into me even harder, and his head caught on my hole enough that it popped in.

“Mmmm,” I moaned, the rush of the poppers washing over me as I felt the pangs of my outer ring trying to accommodate his fat cock head.

“Oh fuck,” his breath caught in surprise.

He held me tighter and pushed harder, a few inches of his hardening dick pushing into my hole in one thrust, softly stretching me out. Or maybe it was the poppers dulling the sensation enough to feel mostly pleasure. “Fuck that feels good,” I mumbled, rocking my ass up to meet his thrust.

“I can’t believe I’m in you; it feels so good,” he huffed in my ear, then rocked his hips hard, pushing another inch deeper. “Fuck, Bryan, oh fuck that feels good,” he mumbled into my ear, his hot breath tickling the hair on my neck.

“Mmm, you want a condom?” I asked, then felt him jam the last few inches into me, which stung a bit, but his heavy ball sack felt good resting on my ass.

“Mmm, no, if I pull out, I’ll never get back in,” he warned.

My heart started racing. Was he suggesting I let him fuck me bare? I didn’t say anything; I just waited to see what he did and got my answer as he pulled halfway out and then thrust in hard. “Ahh, fuck,” I groaned. I quickly uncapped the poppers and took another deep hit, letting the rush help me with his thickening cock. The burn of his big dick was intensifying, but the feeling of getting fucked was so good I didn’t want it to stop. I really didn’t want to ruin it for him; I can’t imagine how good it must be for him to do this without meds. I kept rocking my ass up to meet his thrusting.

He pushed himself up to get more leverage; instead of pulling himself into me, he was straddling my arched ass and fucking into me. The sound of his hips slapping my ass was overpowering the porn on the TV. I couldn’t tell if it was me or not, but the combined moans between us and the porn made it sound like my bedroom was an orgy and I was in heaven. His rhythmic fucking continued, unchanged, probably fearing he’d lose his erection if he changed it up, but his moaning was intensifying with every thrust.

“Fuck, oh fuck,” he slammed his hips into me, and I felt his cock twitch for the first time. He slammed into me again, and suddenly, there was almost no burning, no friction this time, as he grunted and ground his hips into me. “Fuck,” he said breathlessly as he held himself balls-deep in me.

“Shit, I groaned,” a slight panic in my head. “Did you just cum inside me?”

“Mmph…yeah,” he huffed, a relaxed happiness in his voice I hadn’t heard all night.

“Why?” was all I could think to say, feeling his cock already deflated inside me and getting pushed out by the tightness of my ass.

He was still catching his breath, shaking his head, “I couldn’t help it; it was so intense,” he sighed, falling onto the bed next to me and rolling onto his naked back.

I rolled onto my back, got off the bed, and went into the bathroom, using toilet paper to clean my ass up, but my tight hole was holding the majority of his cum inside me. I have only bottomed three times before this, and they all were with condoms. This was a new territory for me. I walked back into the bedroom, where he was already pulling on his underwear over his deflated and shrunken cock.

“Are you…do you have anything?” I asked shyly.

He smiled and shook his head, “Nah, I’m safe, man, that was,” he paused, “…I can’t even remember the last time I was able to fuck a guy that wasn’t my boyfriend,” he told me. “Don’t worry; we get tested regularly because he hooks up with other guys way more than I do since…you know,” he pointed to the bulge in his briefs as he slipped his pants back on.

I felt a little relieved but still a bit nervous. “Ok. I have never done raw sex with a guy, so…”

“I see,” he grinned, this information seeming to do something for him. “Don’t worry, it’s not a big deal,” he said and gave me a quick kiss. He finished dressing and packed his stuff back into his to-go bag. “Now that I know you can handle it, I’ll come prepared next time,” he said, giving my ass cheek a gentle smack. Then, he let himself out of my apartment.

I took a shower, trying my best to use soap to get the lube off my ass, even fingering my ass to clean it out. I changed all the bed sheets, pillowcases, put on clean underwear and got into bed, the porn still playing on my TV. I clicked out of it and saw the following video under it looked really hot. I pushed play and started stroking myself. As soon as the scene got to the part where the guy pushed his dick in bare, my mind went to Felix pumping his bare cock inside me, and with a few more pumps, I shot a massive load of cum onto my stomach.

I quickly cleaned up and turned off the video before the guys on screen could cum. I fell asleep shortly after.

When I woke up in the morning, I had a message on Grindr from Felix; it was a photo of his recent test results, all being negative, with the caption, “So, if you want to get fucked again…let me know. I’ll wear a condom if you want.” I thought about his cum probably being inside my guts still, stripped off my underwear, and rubbed another one out before showering and starting my day.