Taking a break/holiday and returning in December

Hey everyone,  

after working constantly for over half a year on "Symphonic Love", I have decided to take a break - the whole November. Patreons will be refunded (takes up to 10 WORK DAYS - please check out your patreon messages to receive the refund) for November + the patreon page paused. The least I wanna do is milking anyone for the sake of money or harming someone in this community. All the lovely people who believe in me and the project...supporting me (through money/words/acts)...are something I truly cherish. Thank you for this act of appreciation and believe!!!  

Sooo how does it come that I decided this?  

As mentioned when I began the project, I wanna be fully transparent. Perhaps this won't matter to many but I wanna explain the reasoning behind this decision.  The last few days were really really rough for me. Because of personal issues depression started to kick in...this lead to not being able to work properly on the project.  Another thing is....pressure....forcing myself to create new content for the sake staying relevant and numbers. Everyone who is working in the creative field can properly relate to this at some point. This mindset and pressure are a vicious cycle, which is repeating endlessly. Numbers go down? Well, I gotta work more! Fear of not being relevant? Post as often as can! Taking time off? Feeling guilty!  What began as a passion project and fun thing to do turned into a nightmare - devouring my mental health like it's cotton candy.  When I first realised this...I started to take every monday after patch day off and even than I felt guilt. The issue is - I was in to deep already and a prisoner of this mindset. The result were more pressure, depression and sadness. The love for development turned into a unclear negative mass of emotions. Leading to constantly revaluating...my goal as a creator and depriving of my own self worth.   

Does this mean this project is dead?  

NO, NO and NO. I am just taking a break for this month!!! I need to rewire my mindset so that my passion for game development isn't entirely destroyed, recharge my life batteries and rethink some of the project approaches. In December the development will continue with eventually some changes in scheduling or other departments. (No worries the server will still be up + dm's are still open in this time)  I know I shouldn't feel sorry about taking a break/holiday since it's a normal thing....but...yeah...sorry to anyone who was looking forward to play new version (in November) and perhaps letting some of you down (consistency).  Trust me when I say, it wasn't an easy decision and while writing all of this being constantly on the verge of tearing up isn't something I strived for....  But I have to do this, for me...and my personal sake.   I hope, that all of you still stick around with me and the project.   

Thanks for reading and being understanding 

Love   
Indie