Patreon, R&P Q&A #285
Added 2024-09-18 22:15:42 +0000 UTC
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Did you spot where you fucked up & everything went down hill from there? "She rolled her eyes at me and i told her..." You made yourself look like a little bitch in her eyes, at that point it was game on for her after that, you took all the bait, hook, lines & sinker. She's been using that routine since she was 6 ( except the sex part) Rian & MLD have a lot of content out on don't make threats & "you can't talk to me that way " . She got her dopamine from the drama so you got the pussy this time, but if you stay down that path you'll be the pussy who gets none. Ask me how I know.
Cfitness
2024-09-20 18:10:27 +0000 UTCWhat did she do so good to deserve a flower? Was it the blow job? This chick sounds like a fucking succubus, an emotional vampire. That’s just me, that’s the vibe I get when I read this. Clearly she is unaware to other feelings and lacks ability to take social cues. With my rant out of the way I will get to the red pill. Use amuse mastery “that’s what I have to do to get a flower?” Reply with “Well yah that and clean the house” as you laugh and smile. “You’re an asshole” reply “yah but a good looking one.” Shit like that. She called you out for what it was and you caved frame. Monday-Tuesday no sex, you were overt, I know Riane says to use to sometimes but you just aren’t that alpha enough to use it. Use your tools, remove attention, up the dread, be intimate. Fuck me or fuck you only gets you more duty booty starfish fucking.
Validation Junkie
2024-09-19 18:07:37 +0000 UTCIt made him lose frame because he took it personally and questioned his sanity for a day. It was far beyond the "do they have a point".
Op Sec
2024-09-19 18:06:58 +0000 UTCself deprecating humor. be wary of it. For women, everything is a status game.
Op Sec
2024-09-19 18:05:21 +0000 UTCFrame at a bar and game in big business negotiations At a party, in a group of people downing bears. I drank my (rare) soda and proceed to take my (“cancer”) pills. Admittedly it was a funny situation and warranted shit test. They dare Shit test a shit test ninja? Me: a and amplify: “see this pill. Makes your dick 1 and a quarter inch longer…. This one, changes your zodiac sign for 6 minutes. Great for, You know…!” I put my hand out to give them to the one who dare shit test me. (Subtext: joking— that he needs dick lengthening and sexual enhancement.) (Laugh)… the sober man(me) taking pills is accepted into the buzzed group. A giant chain wants our business in their stores (lots of stores.) life changing type of deal. My wife is on edge acting up. I could take it or leave it. Her: “ we could of made this look better… what if this or that…” Me: “they will see the real business and decide. If it does not happen then we move on.” She accepts the frame and calms down. On dealing with the companies point person I establish a frame: we are not trying to bamboozle you. This is our business. Take it or leave it. My wife’s frame is different though: she is talking everything up. Example Wife is pushing us hard. Talking to much. Appearing needy and low value. (Amature game) “we do this and that…” (it is apparent she is going on and on) Me: “Are you sure you all want to get in a contract with my wife?! Well I guess I did…” She is pushing so much I supply the pull. As in game: you have to push and pull.
Cousin Eddie
2024-09-19 17:58:10 +0000 UTCRegarding my last report, she always took SSRIs, but reduced the dose, and now concrete symptoms she is having are insomnia and nightmares. She's back to the old dose, but has not returned to normal yet. Anyway… I am pulling away a bit and it seems to work. On friday there was a social event at my place she was invited to and she said she doesn't want to come, as she „wallows in self pity“. Just texted back „Hm, ok“. Resisted to provide comfort. On Saturday I invited her over for lunch. She replied that she is with some of her girls, they are trying to cheer her up. Answered “alright, good luck to them”. Later she came over and gave me a blowjob which she initiated. After that we went to the city, as one of her friends had her birthday. As we were sitting at the bar a guy selling roses came by. I ignored him but she told me she wanted one as he was gone. Told her if she wanted one she should have told him that she wanted to buy one. But then I got her one. Told her she was good today, with a wink, she stopped for a minute and then laughed. “So that’s what I have to do when I want something.” Not sure if that’s good or bad. Treat me nice, I treat you nice. Or an invitation for Manipulation. The Birthday Girl's boyfriend wanted to go home early, left and she went with him which ended the night. My girl asked me to help her understand why he did that, told her he was probably tired and had a long drive home. „So it’s all about him? So selfishly?“ remembered cousins' eddies post about using other people’s divorces as examples. Told her that if her friend took good care of her man, he should have stayed, if not I get why he did it“. Not sure if that made any sense, just something I tried to imitate. On Sunday morning we had sex. She put up an uncomfortable amount of fake resistance but I decided to blow through it. She giggled and covered her body, when I kissed her nipples. I then pinned her arms down and kissed them again and stuff like that. In the end she removed her panties and not me, so I feel comfortable with the amount of force I used looking back. On monday and tuesday we had no sex and I told her I am unhappy about the situation and that she is my only source of sex. She suggested I can think about opening the relationship on my side. But to not tell her about it if I do. I meant to suggest it but that she suggested it surprised me a lot. She told me, she will probably cry about this later. I provided lots of comfort and cuddling as a response. I know that's my problem. I am way too much comfort.
Am I red yet
2024-09-19 17:32:46 +0000 UTCThis is a Dear Abby question. Do you think anybody (especially online) can accurately judge your character? In general likable people can fuck up allot and still get raises. Unlikable people can be perfect and get fired. Do the math. Win friends and influence people is a great book for this question. Also stfu works. Next report: take action to change (or not and double down) and report on what happens. Ooda.
Cousin Eddie
2024-09-19 17:27:35 +0000 UTCFucking is your prerogative! If your “friends” give you drama then so be it. Frame: I fuck. You want to be with me then fuck me. There is the door if you don’t like it.
Cousin Eddie
2024-09-19 17:17:48 +0000 UTCI agree airports are awesome for “single serving friends.” I have a second profile for my “influencer” account. It’s an open profile and anyone can add me. I have all sorts of chicks following me that I don’t follow back. Gives a lot of “plausible deniability.” Even my wife follows me on my other account. It would be more of an issue if she found Patreon than my instagram by a long shot.
Validation Junkie
2024-09-19 17:12:22 +0000 UTCSeems to be a bit out of character then. Could be a million things. 1-2 year mark is when people tend to show their true colors. Take this time to improve your skills with your sparring partner. Only time will tell if this is normal behavior for her and if you want to deal with it.
Validation Junkie
2024-09-19 17:04:03 +0000 UTCDownloaded Hutton’s book. Hard for me to understand how the legal fight translated into a loss of frame. I know you can’t get to specific. You were acting as if there were certain rules at play but they “went below the hard deck”. So now you are adjusting. A tit for tat game theory situation. How did this change your frame? The laws of physics in your life?
Cousin Eddie
2024-09-19 16:51:18 +0000 UTCAirports: I have allot of success at airports. There is an inherent social proof to being in one (if you dress and act mid or higher). We all draw the line of c and r…. Will your wife find your secret profile? Certainly this patreon is more scandalous than an account with some girl followers. If she found it … and?
Cousin Eddie
2024-09-19 16:27:59 +0000 UTCyou're not the main character in your own field report. If you are going to have a report like this, just let her write it. > I enjoyed her when she's happy and she was generally pretty easy to take care of. Stop the caretaking behaviors. Did you read NMMNG. > to pay attention when I'm speaking to her She wasn't validating you. Stop validation seeking behavior, it's unattractive. > So I just told her "listen, this tension is driving me insane, I'm going to the gym to blow off some steam." and left. Next time leave without saying a god damn word. > WTF. How does she go from extremely pissed to extremely horny? You do realize she's a woman, right? > strong fight, strong makeup, strong happy period Type 2 capn. Those strong emotions are what is stirring her. Manufactured outrage could work well here. The flower's trick is tried and true here. >The problem here I recognize is me being afraid of her feelings I think you are scared that you would be unable to replace her. You have a covert contract that you can fix her.
Op Sec
2024-09-19 16:27:38 +0000 UTCI think everything you said is spot on, minus the tyupe 2 captain. She's been good all year that we've been dating. This is including the occasional emotional outburst. It's just that her moods are getting more intense since we returned from teh vacation. That's the good and the bad - happy, sad, horny, bored. The same just more intense. Sure, I enjoy the good ones, but I'm struggling to maintain frame for the bad ones.
Diego Verga
2024-09-19 16:10:06 +0000 UTCFrame issue, be the oak. I am guessing type 2 captain with a constantly complaining passenger. You are dealing with a neurotic girl that was in the height of her chemical swing. Keep some notes with dates for a few months to see if they correlate. My chick always rethinks all of her life’s decisions a week leading up to shark week. Chicks love feeling emotions and that’s gets the anxiety going which leads to some hot sex sessions. Like Riane says I rather her mad than sad. Further proof you can do anything to chick except bore them. Boot the nice guy that feels the need to calm a situation, also when you are out don’t update her. You removed your attention for a reason. It undermines you when you update her. Settles the anxiety instead of build it. Give her the gift of missing you. Never down play your accomplishments, think irrational confidence. STFU-failed Shitty comfort test-failed Remove attention-failed Comes down to weak frame and you are afraid of her feelings. Nice guy behavior. The STFU in the bed got you results-yes she fucked you into a good mood and manipulated you, that’s the kind of manipulation us men want. You want that shelf put up last minute-sure fuck me. You want me in a good mood-fuck me. Also write these reports from your point of view. I invited the chick over for Netflix and chill-not we were…
Validation Junkie
2024-09-19 16:01:03 +0000 UTCPeople provoke you because you are easily provoked. You see everything through the lens of status and nothing through the lens of getting things done. You are rubbing people the wrong way. > I refuse to be sworn at by my Manager. You're being an idiot, that much is clear from that statement. You've got ego and pride. So what if you are setting boundaries, nobody is willing to accept them. Since this is a pattern in your life, I'd be willing to wager the issue is you, I think you are starting to realize that. What you are doing is hiding the badness. I bet if you wrote out the details of that last interaction where you "refused to be sworn at", it would become very obvious. The other thing you are doing is lacking your own mental point of origin. "This happened to me", "The same thing happened to me in High Schoool", "A certain group of teachers ... ", "damn did they back each other up", Fucking own it. e.g. I cause a reaction in people, I'm not sure why, but in high school, I got provoked and my outbursts got me in trouble. and even there "I got provoked" It's passive. > I wonder if my demeanor, attitude or honesty and being straight forward has gotten me into this mess. demeanor, maybe. The rest is victim mindset combined with revenge fantasy.
Op Sec
2024-09-19 15:40:24 +0000 UTCHey Rian, Quick follow-up from last week's field report: No, I'm not on SSRIs, but you gave me some good points to consider when we were discussing me taking too much time for the moneyshot during sex. In any case, the appointment with the urologist is scheduled in a few weeks and I'm treating it now how you said - just an thing that I'm taking care of, and nothing more. With that being said, OH BOY were you right that a man's frame can only really be tested while in a relationship! I can see that I am at that stage in my development where I catch myself in the middle of making mistakes, but I can't run my OODA loops fast enough yet to fix the behavior. I'll give examples here in a bit. Just want to state that my current goal is this: relationship has been very good for the last year, with its ups and downs. The girl clearly sees value in me, but my goal right now is to prevent this relationship from going the same way as the others: where I act needy/validation seeking/unattractive and slowly drain the attraction from her. I guess that she still has a high attraction level to me because she continues to do the things that I like: effort in sex, sex when I want (has not turned me down that I can recall), does things around my apartment like clean up and nesting behaviors, generally in good behavior, etc. However, I'm starting to see that she isn't all sunshine and rainbows. I'm starting to develop that "hate" of "hate her just a little bit" because recently she has been running me through the ringer a bit. This is what I mean: Over the last year I had gotten used to how she behaves. It was never nothing I couldn't manage. If she was upset, I'd let her vent until she said she feels better and I notice a change in behavior, all I would do was listen to her run her mouth and reflect what she said back to her. When she was tired or stressed, I'd feed her, take her to cuddle until she fell asleep and/or fucked her. I enjoyed her when she's happy and she was generally pretty easy to take care of. But, after the trip to Greece, her emotions have gotten more intense. All the emotions/moods are there: happy, sad, stressed, horny, etc. They've just been more intense and I'm struggling to keep up (in particular with the negative ones). I'll give examples next, but I think it's important to mention these details for context: 1. This happened in the 7-9 days prior to her period, which dropped 3 day ago. 2. She has been under a lot of stress until literally yesterday with going back to university and lining up a job/internship in her field that would keep her after graduating. 3. She doesn't live in the dorms anymore. This year she moved back in with her parents to save money, so that takes our distance from being an hour away to being about 3.5 ish. Which I don't think is a problem at all but she was freaking out about it for the longest time. 4. I had not lifted from the start of our vacation till about last week, being around 1.5 months without lifting. I imagine that's enough time to have an effect on my testosterone levels. I'm back to working out hard this week and am already feeling more calm. Anyway, here's the most recent argument. On Saturday she was over at my place for the weekend, we were going to have a chill weekend and do relaxing things. Saturday afternoon she's talking about how she feels she 'needs to get on my level' and how in her eyes I'm 'so accomplished.' (I'm nothing special, just a regular guy, but I'm 31 and she's 22 and in college, of course I'm going to be further along than her). This devolved into a fight, I don't remember exactly what about, but she rolled her eyes at me and I raised my voice at her telling her to not do that to me, to pay attention when I'm speaking to her. This set her off, tears, etc and locked herself in my room. I crumbled and went into panic mode, trying to cajole her and tried to get her to come out to resolve the issue (I was having that feeling of 'oh no, mommy's mad and it's my fault so I have to fix it'). She eventually came out but gave me the silent treatment the whole day. I went to bed and she didn't even try to take over the bed, she just slept on the couch. She doesn’t have a car so she can't leave herself. Anyway, the next morning same thing, silent treatment. I was trying to not let it get to me, but I failed. So I just told her "listen, this tension is driving me insane, I'm going to the gym to blow off some steam." and left. I went to the gym, then went with some buddies to play some soccer. I texted her this update. I was thinking her mood was getting better cause she posted some pictures of us that we recently took on her Instagram stories. But I get back, and still the silent treatment, into the evening. Finally I caved again in the evening and started talking to her about it. We started arguing again but this time it was her berating me. She said some mean shit but I tried to placate her (bad). But it seemed to wind down. It eventually ended in a lighter note, but still tense and not fully resolved. I went to bed, and this time she bitched at me that I should be the one sleeping in the sofa. I just ignored her and she slept again in the sofa (lol). Then in the middle of the night, she wakes me up and says "I'm still upset, but I want you so much" and we fucked. This time, she was being much more horny and lascivious than she usually is. And something important: I'm quite a kinky guy. Think "tossing of a particular side dish," and "down to the third knuckle" variety. I like that done to me. Usually if I ask it of her she will do it without complaint, but she never initiates the kinkier things. This time she initiated the kinkier stuff and we did most of the things I like. It was a very intense session. After that of course she was fine and the next morning she was basically floating from how happy she was. WTF. How does she go from extremely pissed to extremely horny? Anyway, during this time period, all of our fights have followed the same pattern - strong fight, strong makeup, strong happy period. It's fucking tiring but oh well, I guess if she's tossing my salad, it means she's invested, huh? The problem here I recognize is me being afraid of her feelings. At least now I'm catching myself making mistakes, even if I can't yet correct my behavior mid-fuck up. That's the next step. Thanks for the time.
Diego Verga
2024-09-19 15:19:14 +0000 UTCGeorge Hutton's Frame Control (recommended on mrp) might be a good quick read for you that applies in these situations.
Op Sec
2024-09-19 15:01:45 +0000 UTCI would say get a slump buster. I get the sense that you're coming off as star struck.
Op Sec
2024-09-19 14:38:47 +0000 UTCIt’s funny you say this because I had the same covert contract when I went through the legal system. I assumed if I treated someone a certain way then the “professional curtesy” would be reciprocal. I learned really fast “all’s fair in love and war.” (Which you probably understand better than me being as you litigate for a living). I stopped applying that rule to just love and war, and applied it to all aspect of my life. Humans are self interested and willing to bend their morals and ethics to get what they want. So now I live by the rules of boxing “keep your hands up and protect yourself at all times.” That’s the game, and the only people that don’t like the game are the ones that suck at it or don’t join in. Good work on applying the assertive bill of rights and pivoting.
Validation Junkie
2024-09-19 14:19:39 +0000 UTCWay to filter out the escort. I agree be more asshole when she brings up past relationships. Even with work chicks or girls I have conversations with as soon as they do this I tell them, “hey save that talk for the view or you best girlfriend, and that ain’t me.” Breaks them trying to make you an emotional tampon. Put nerd on the back burner, try going no contact. She’s not interested and any contact from you at this point will be a DLV. Dude nice work on escalating with Divorce chick. Only thing I might give is you could have done a freeze out, completely killed the mood the second time, drink down, music off lights on, move away and turn tv on to baseball. Not saying you handled it wrong, just an option when handling LMR.
Validation Junkie
2024-09-19 14:05:17 +0000 UTCBest way to get ran out of a place is constantly question authority. This isn’t exact but I feel like it goes along with the 48 law of power, never outshine the master, it should also say don’t question the masters authority. People in power want to feel secure. Learn to calibrate that. Maybe consider reading how to win friends and influence people. As far as work goes you have probably been such a pain in the dick questioning everyone and their decisions that they are done with you, no recovery, you are shunned from the group to die on the vine. Find new employment asap and instantly start off on the right foot.
Validation Junkie
2024-09-19 12:39:56 +0000 UTCHi Rian, Hope you're good man. A while back I asked your advice on being rail-roaded/worked out from my job because I wouldn'tdo any fraud or partake in their corruption. You advised me to suck it up while I look for another job, wh8ich I'm currently doing. My question is if there is I'm doing something wrong as this had happened at my previous job also. I was an apprentice and at the very start one specific department I worked in gave me a very hard time, provoked the hell out of me, and essentially was trying to make sure, I don't learn anything and get me to fail. The same thing happened to me while I was in High School. A certain group of teachers would scold me for no reason at all, gave me a hard time, and if I did make a mistake, I would get the full might of the law. It looked like it was some sort of non-verbal agreement between them to get rid of me, and damn, did they back each other up. From High School, 2005, till now in my work career, this has been carrying on. I wonder if my demeanor, attitude or honesty and being straight forward has gotten me into this mess. I do question superiors a lot when I see something doesn't look right as it may fall on me or I might be their scapegoat. Rollo did advised me to read 48LOP by Robert Greene, it has helped, I'm learning to play the game socially but work wise, it's a different story, I'm getting knocked - to the point where I won't be getting paid this month because I refuse to be sworn at by my Manager. Hope this makes sense. Am I doing something right or something wrong.
Krits
2024-09-19 08:21:35 +0000 UTCFR 2 The other day we went to a JH football game my son was playing in. Wife had been being kinda snarky most of the day and the game didn't go well so she got even more worked up. Got home and the kids were (4 of them) being kids in full force. I managed the evening activities best I could and when everyone was settled in I retreated to office to read WISNIFG. Still feeling pretty annoyed/pissed, I took a change of clothes and retreated to the old hired hand cabin just a couple hundred yards away from our home to read, workout (I have workout equipment there) and spend the night. While I was reading wife calls: Wife: Why are you not home? Me: Because I want peace and I get it here, when at home I want respect and love. Wife: Was I being disrespectful? I didn't think I was being that bad. Me: Yes, I understand you worry bout our kids doing well at sports and school but they do pretty well at both and I don't appreciate being snipped at after work for the remainder of the day. Wife: Will you come home tomorrow? Me: We'll see I'm gonna read now good night. I just spent the one night and she's been better since. I've done this several times in the past and a couple weeks ago I spent a week at the cabin over her blowing up at a shit storm mess the kids and I made while canning garden produce in the kitchen one weekend. She was out of bounds as far as I was concerned especially since we always clean up after ourselves and I've been fed up with shitty behavior on her end. She had been pretty good since, but I wasn't in the mood to be around the other night. When hit up about why I stay in the cabin when I do I always tell her I want respect and love at home and if not I want peace and get it at the cabin. Our ranch is a little ways from town so I can't just go 5 mins to a gym the cabin is my gym. Bedroom is pretty slow, she's been griping about a yeast infection for about 2 months yet once in awhile I get action and no mention about it. This morning she was cranky about the infection again and said she actually did something about it. In the past I've told her to go see the gyno and she gets irritated and I bounce. She says she only likes to take a pill for it and hates the manual treatments/application but she went for the manual today which I assume is a minor plus. Maybe she is starting to make an effort I don't know. It's not like we aren't hygenic I dont know why she'd put it off so long and I assume it's just an excuse to turn me down usually. Either way, I award some minor praise and go about my day. Known about MRP for little over a year and I sometimes get steaming mad about how things have been going so I try not to be around when I get this way. Been through a lot of the side bar, even listened to NMMNG last year but got WISNIFG started the other night and wow, I put it off because I thought I said no plenty and thought I was assertive but there's a bit I was missing there. I've considered scorched earth dread but consider myself unskilled enough to go scorched earth plus, I would rather have all my ducks in a row IF things don't go how I would prefer. I'm slowly taking over some finances and getting out way ahead of ranch management decisions/scheduling as the in-laws are very type A. Working on OODA loops but have a ways to go like with everything else in MRP. Rian you asked about the ranch. It's 8000 acres total half barley, wheat and hay dry (not irrigated) farmland and half pasture that we run 400 head of black angus cows on. In addition, I have a small trucking business that works locally hauling agriculture commodities.
Joker43
2024-09-19 05:47:33 +0000 UTCField Report #26 This week I didn't have any expectations for sex and flirted and kept the physicalness during the week. Noticed this week I didn't all that horny until later in the week. The intimacy was there but didn't have the desire to initiate until late in the week. Got a hard no from the wife when the kids went to bed. Next day invited some friends and their kids over. Smoked cigars with the dad, talked guns and his lifting routine. A few opportunities to be cocky funny when getting flirty shit tests from the wife at our bar, not taking her seriously. Next afternoon getting ready for a party at a friends house, while the kids were watching TV initiated with the wife and had a quickie before we left. Next day kept flirting throughout the day and by the time the kids went to bed initiated for and fucked another round. When going to bed she brought up some shit from earlier in the day about our friends and how I wasn't listening when she thought I was and started getting pissy about it. Then shifted to I take too much room in the bed and she doesnt have any room. Used this opportunity to agree and amplify the situation. Rolled over and went to bed. Didn't realize but she was still pissed and left the bed and didn't come back until later. I slept like a baby. Next day she brought up how I cared more about space for my iPad in the bed instead of her. Looked her dead in the eye and said "babe, its not an iPad, its an iPad pro" and gave her shit eating grin. She called me an asshole and we went on about our day. A few observations from this week. First, the wife down to fuck more often when its the weekend and there are less responsibilities like kids and chores. At least for the last few weeks its meeting my needs but that may shift in the future. Using opportunities of hard no's to practice my outcome independence. Second, is my emotions are more stable when I stay with my lifting routine. Work schedule requires me to use hotel gyms while traveling and their gyms are significantly less robust that my normal gym. It happens a few times a month but I can definitely tell the difference when I go a few weeks without my normal routine and replace a lifting day with cardio.
Amos_Durden
2024-09-19 05:03:50 +0000 UTCSet up an additional date with a girl I met at a social outing a couple months ago. She travels a lot including going on safaris and texted me that she would be in the city for a few days. Thought it would be fun if it turned out that I would fuck her on Friday then nerd girl on Saturday. Overall, planned a date with Safari girl on Friday. Nerd girl on Saturday. Divorce girl on Wednesday. Safari Girl Initial plan was coffee shop – walk in the park – back to my place to check on dog – then bar – then back to my place. Immediate shit test in the beginning – sent a text asking me to meet her halfway to pick her up so she wouldn’t have ride the metro all the way. I said no. When we met, I noticed she was wearing a low-cut dress and heels. Nice juicy tits and looked like she gave good blowjobs. She was really excited to see me and gave multiple IOIs without me giving any additional DHVs. Within half an hour, I was touching the small of her back without her pulling away and made her admit that she swallows. Caught her saying a bunch of small lies and being dramatic with her storytelling. Thought she had histrionic personality disorder. I did get neurotic about her being crazy, but came to the conclusion: let’s just focus on taking her through the date and figure out a final decision later. She told me she got knee surgery over the summer, and it was still giving her issues. Thought it was stupid of her to wear heels - recalibrated the plan to go back to my place instead of walking around the park. Came back to my place for the dog, she came inside, we did a couple shots and built some more rapport. Only stayed for a few minutes, but in hindsight could have stayed here longer since we were comfortable. Walked over to the dive bar which is only five minutes away, but she already had slight issues walking and was starting to complain about her leg. She bought the drinks. As the set went on, I could feel her interest diminishing, and I knew it was over once she started talking about a guy she recently stopped seeing and asked me about insight into his behavior. After that she wanted to call an Uber. Still did a hail mary and brought up that she could wait at my place for an Uber, but she said no. She offered to drop me off at my place when the Uber arrived – I said I’m good and left. Reflecting back the morning after, I realized she was a former escort. She was a high school dropout, had expensive taste, networked with wealthy men, and talked about two of her best friends being former escorts. In terms of improvement – gradually throughout the interaction her interest diminished, and I think it was because I wasn’t doing enough assholish behaviors. I focused on being aloof, positive, and nonjudgmental, but I think it came off as too passive. I also need to learn other ways to give DHVs outside of stories since this girl nonstop gave outlandish stories for the attention and mine couldn’t compare. I think the other key moment was when we initially stopped at my place – I should have escalated at lot more strongly – at that point try to make out with her (which I should have done here since I didn’t go to the park) and actually even try to hook up here. We were isolated, and given we had spent some time together at a previous outing, there was a good chance I could have gotten a better response by deviating and pushing harder here. Nerd Girl Texted her on Thursday. She replied that she would love to have movie night with me – but noticed that she responded 6 hrs later compared to her usual within 30 min. Made sure not to text her back to confirm things because that would come off as too needy. Saturday came. She canceled last minute saying she didn’t feel good and asking for a rain check. I said it was fine. She replied thanking me, but didn’t offer future times she would be available. Understood that this was a possible outcome – a little bit pissed but moreso because she was wasting my time. Currently planning on skipping asking her to hangout this weekend then sending a text the weekend after to do a movie night. Divorce Girl Just had the night out with divorce girl – drinking some whiskey as I write this. We went out to watch a play at a fancy theater. I dressed up in a nice suit. She was wearing a really low cut dress – boobs almost bouncing out. Did cocky funny on the way there and was on fire and could feel that she loved it. She did call me out though saying I felt like a protagonist from romcom movies from the 2000s. She also was asking if I was negging her or reading dating guides. I STFU. Got the IOIs – saw her in my peripheral vision looking to see my reaction throughout the play. Walked her back to her home. When I got there said I was going to call a Lyft, she said are you sure you don’t want a drink – I have whiskey. Took that as the go ahead signal. We nursed whiskey and talked about sex among other things on her small couch. Started touching her ankles and legs during conversation and she didn’t move away. During a good time I traced my fingers down her thighs. Didn’t move away. Started touching her sides and breasts when she said I can’t do this to my best friend. Took it as LMR. I said sure and went to nursing the whiskey. We made some more small talk and talked more about sex. I tried again after a few minutes and was touching her legs and squeezing her ass. She closed up and gave the adamant no. Told me that she would do stuff with me if it weren’t for her best friend being really into me and having gone out on dates with me. She then directly told me she would be telling nerd girl everything that happened tonight. I said that she should. Weird thing was that I meant it too. I took a risk trying to escalate because I wanted to have sex with divorce girl. I’m not trying to hide my actions, I’m just trying to get laid. I guess it blew up on me here. I called a Lyft, came back home, and finished writing this. Key Thoughts - Got some practice in with the Safari girl. Need to do some fine tuning. - Nerd girl canceled doing a movie night with me and hasn’t offered any other dates of availability – going to postpone setting up a movie date with her for a week and ask her to do something following week. - Glad I escalated with divorce girl, but right now a bit sad and tipsy about how everything panned out
lemon
2024-09-19 04:26:11 +0000 UTCEverything is great except this one thing... I had a hard frame check at work last week. The type of employment law I is high risk, high reward. Although it has been contentious at times, this one case that has subsumed my life has gone from a level 8 to level 15 (out of 10). I'm litigating a high money case where I'm effectively lead. It's also a case where I'm getting partial credit, which goes to my financials for partnership aspects. So to be clear, it's an important case to me. The other Friday, my opposing counsel filed documents in court that undermined my frame. The filings made no sense strategically but also, if granted, would make me (really my client) lose the case. I took it personally, and I had a freak out moment where questioned my sanity for a day because of the litigation actions the other side took. With some separation, I recognize that I allowed my frame to be broken (or suggesting I didn't have sufficient frame on the case or myself). I sought validation from several colleagues because it was a type of fight I'd never seen before though not something that hadn't been done before in the case law. On reflection, I was operating under a covert contract. In my mind, I'd rationalized that if I play by certain "professional" rules on certain legal procedural matters, then the other side would do the same and I would have a problem free "professional" life. That is not true to a certain point. That is because the mental models from WISNIFG and NMMNG still need to apply to navigate professional life. After the day of questioning, I stopped. I applied my assertive bill of rights and responded by opposing their actions, pointing out how my client (read me) was right, and then taking it to the court--the hard power involved--to resolve. I also changed my lifting from volume for sculpting to heavy to help burn out the nervous system. It's odd because this is an arena where hard power exists in that the courts are involved. It's also an arena where I'm relying on other's "field reports," i.e., case law and other lawyers' experiences with the judges. I'm curious if there are any field reports from RuleZeroDad/Chesty on navigating redpill on the legal profession, if any. Otherwise, some sex. Still leaning out, working out. Buying assets/paying down debt in the advance of the recession after the US election.
CovertContractAttorney
2024-09-19 03:03:51 +0000 UTCField Report #16 Life has been pretty solid. I have gotten woken up the last couple of mornings with my wife crawling on top. Morning fun and off to the shower. I don’t think we missed a day the entire time (13 days) I was home. Sometimes multiple times a day. In the past this level of sex would be achieved by having really big highs and lows. I have been doing much better at applying the tools consistently and I am happy with the results I am getting. Flying to work As the plane parked at the gate a very beautiful Thai girl rushed to the front and was standing right next to my seat. I wanted to game her a little bit, yet I was nervous. Mostly because I knew that the first thing out of my mouth had to be a neg. So I decided to play off the fact she cut in front of everyone. I looked up and tapped her on the arm. She slid her headphones off and I said, you know it’s going to cost you if you want to cut. I could tell the comment took her back a little bit but she didn’t take it offensively. She started to stammer a bit and I instantly hit her with another neg, “do you do your own nails.” (Took this neg from Mystery) She paused and replied “no, they are acrylics, but I need to go in and get them done again, they are a bit grown out.” I reach out my hand and said “let me see.” She complied, I took her hand and pretended to inspect her nails.” Tossed her hand back and agreed with her. I made sure to smile so that she didn’t take my comment too harshly. She asked my name and what I did. I fucked with her and told her I was an underwater basket weaver that loved to travel. As I was talking to her i taped her luggage and indicated to her to step back, she complied and I stood up. She asked if I had Instagram and I told her I did. A few seconds later she handed me her phone, I made sure to punch in my other account not to cross contaminate with my personal. If I was really wanting to take this somewhere I would have probably approached the number close a different way. I am playing catch and release not catch and get divorced and this is a girl that was hot enough that I would have definitely caved. I chatted with her on the way out and left her with a wave over the shoulder. I haven’t collected an insta before so my nice guy was definitely screaming at me. The purpose of the exchange for me was to create the abundance mindset, not hand out free validation, and continue to sharpen my game. Next time when asked my name I will reply with “what’s your name?” Just to play around with frame shifting and see how it works. I did check her insta in the morning when I woke up to satisfy my curiosity. I had to see if the hunt was worth it. Yes she was hot and yes she was a rave girl. I was pleased with myself that I doubled down on the neg’s. That kind of girl is use to a shit ton of free validation. Which made me even happier that I didn’t let her cut me in line haha. Now the last part of this abundance building exercise was to unfollow her. To me it signifies that even when I catch a trophy fish, I have so much abundance I don’t mind tossing it back in the ocean. In my past I would definitely of held on to it and looked at it from time to time, relishing in the catch and salivating like a beta chump. I did cruise through her picks one last time. She was a really hot 5’4” Thai girl with solid tits. Sue me.
Validation Junkie
2024-09-19 00:15:04 +0000 UTC
