Smoking minds (preview)

It's a week since my latest upload because my mind is smoking...

Actually I am heavily working in new software for my gallery access and - almost ;-)  all my concentration goes into this. There are several changes with which I especially want to better favor those Patrons that are and continue to support me for a longer time. I am also trying to organize to offer you at least some images in larger sizes in future, which needs some changes in my editing work flow.

I'll soon inform you in detail.

But what primarily makes my mind smoking is that I had the idea to stop smoking, and I am not at all sure, if this is a good idea... So here's my personal smoking story, only for those who want to know some more about another aspect of my life.

I started smoking when I was 12 years old because I have been put in a terrible private boarding school "Alpines Instititut Lenk" with a mean-spirited owner, Dieter Wernecke. It was hell. But there was the promise (they called it "threat") that they kicked you out if you break some of the many strict rules.

I started smoking to break rules. I only smoked when I was sure that dirty Wernecke would see me but the cruel creep didn't throw me out. I had to suffer another year and when I finally could leave I already was a heavy smoker. That's the sad beginning.

But later, and during more than 50 years, I almost always enjoyed smoking very much. 

It is a pleasure, and fun. And until quite recently I never felt any disadvantages, all the contrary. Most other people are more often sick than I, have less energy, much less sex, are more often in a bad mood than I.

I also have the feeling that smoking girls are in general much more sensual and sexy than non-smoking girls. Maybe it is really true that they care less about rules, are more open to forbidden pleasures and to take some risks for a kick, while the non-smokers let their actions be governed by reason and not by amusement and still are evaluating if it maybe would be worthwhile to get closer to me or not, while the smoking girl already snuggles with me...

And, apart of the many occasions to easily approach an unknown girl (or being approached by her) with "got a light?" and apart of the many marvelous relaxed moments full of pleasure that one can experience smoking a cigarette together, smoking girls never surprise you with a bad breath when you kiss them. They simply smell like smoke, which I like.

So everything fine, except that some time ago I felt much less energy and my legs began to hurt, sometimes very much. I had some ultrasonic testings with nothing worrisome, and also the cardiological examination ended with excellent results, too   

"Your only problem is smoke", said the doctor. In short: smoking reduces oxygen in blood and constricts blood vessels. As my blood vessels are already a bit constricted, with smoking they constrict more, leaving less (in addition oxygen-reduced) blood for my muscles, which thus hurt. While without smoking my blood vessels are still by far good enough.

So I went to an laser-acupuncture treatment yesterday that should help me to stop smoking. 

It didn't have the promised effect of reducing my withdrawal symptoms, but here I sit writing this, since 24 hours without a cigarette, after a night sleeping as bad as never before, nervous, dizzy, with difficulties to concentrate, quite bad humored, terribly wanting to smoke.

I have no idea if this time I will be able to quit smoking (I have tried several times in my life). We will see.

Meanwhile here a preview of a series with a girl who does exactly what I would so much like to do right now :-)