Don't Knock It 'Till You Try It, Part 1

"Dude! Hey, man, I love your videos!"

Dan Klaus turned to see a guy in his 20s, about his own age, a big grin plastered on his face. He was holding his hand out, palm down in the bro style. The guy seemed to be a regular dude, and Dan, feeling at ease, smiled back.

"Hey, thanks, bro." Dan clasped the guy's hand and shook it, finding he had a strong grip.

"Name's Austin."

"Hey, Austin. Always glad to meet someone who likes my work."

"Yeah, dude, I love the crazy, stupid shit you do!"

Dan laughed. "Best job in the world, man. Sit around, play some pranks and say stupid shit on video, post it, and cash your check when the views go up."

"No shit! Nobody has that much fun in some fuckin' office! Hey, lemme buy you a drink! What you havin'?"

"Hey, thanks, man. Gimme a Beam."

"You got it, bro." Austin caught the bartender and ordered one for each of them. While they were waiting for their drinks, he looked at Dan. "So, whatcha got comin' up?"

"Yeah, actually, I just finished one a couple hours ago."

"Oh, yeah? Is it one of your pranks or, like, some stupid stunt or what?"

Dan laughed. "Yeah, I asked people on the streets what they thought about universal healthcare. You know, something that gets people talking. And then when they started talking, I kept saying 'honk' and acted like nothing was wrong."

Austin grinned. "Aw, dude, I bet you got some sick reactions!"

"Fuck yeah! This one old bitch kept stopping and looking at me with this look on her face like she couldn't figure out what the fuck I was doing. Finally, she's like, 'Are you alright?'"

"What'd you do?"

"Said I was fine and could we stick to the topic."

Their drinks were put in front of them, and Austin laughed again. "I can't wait to see it! Hey, actually, I got some ideas for some funny shit you could do."

"Yeah? Whatchu got, bro?"

"Okay, check this out. You could hang out in, like, a liquor store holding a Bible and trying to talk to people about Jesus."

Dan looked doubtful. "Yeah?"

"But you're drunk."

The YouTuber laughed. "Dude, that's great! I'm gonna fuckin' do that!"

"Hey, I got more too!" But Austin cut himself off suddenly and added, "Hey, you mind if we get a table? It's gettin' crowded up here, and I don't want anyone stealing my ideas, you know?"

"Yeah, I got you. Look, there are some over there outta the way."

They slid past patrons to the tables and sat down. They talked for a few minutes when Austin heard his name and turned to see who was speaking.

"Rob! Hey, dude, look who I found!"

Rob walked up to the table and looked down, his eyes bugging out when he saw who was sitting there. "No fuckin' way! You're Dan Klaus! Dude, I love your vids!"

"This is my buddy Rob, Dan. Like you see, he's a fan too."

Dan said hello and asked Rob to join them, so he sat down on another side of the table between the other two guys.

Austin motioned to the YouTube star. "I was telling Dan my ideas for his channel."

"Yeah? What do you think, man? Lame?"

Dan shook his head. "Naw, dude's got some good ideas. I'm gonna end up doing some of this shit."

"For real?" Rob turned to his friend. "Dude, that's awesome!"

"Yeah, I can't wait to see it done."

The three of them talked and laughed for a few minutes, commiserating and bonding over pranks, girls, and bro culture in general.

The topic had come back around to video topics, and Rob spoke up. "You know what I'd like to see more of? You going after freaks and weirdos. Like the diaper people."

Dan looked confused. "Diaper people?"

"Yeah, the ones who act like babies."

"Oh, yeah the ABDLs!"

Austin's eyes lit up with recognition. "Oh, Jesus, I saw that shit!"

Dan kinda rolled his eyes. "Dudes, those people are the biggest fucking losers! And fuckin' creepy too! Like, they say they're not pedos, but come on, anyone who gets off on wearing a fucking diaper has a big fucking problem, and you can't tell me they don't like little kids. Even if they don't, they piss and shit themselves like fucking babies, and it's disgusting. It's not normal!"

Rob set his drink down. "Yeah, man, that's what I'm talking about! I loved seeing you take those freaks down, and there are a lot of sick fucks like that out there who get off on weird-ass shit."

Austin nodded. "If more normal people spoke out about shit like that, people wouldn't do it so much. Like, what about--" Austin stopped and suddenly looked distracted. "Hey, y'all check it out. Slut alert!"

The other two turned to look and saw a tall, thin, curvaceous, very pretty girl standing several feet away.

"Holy fuck!" Dan didn't even try to be quiet about it. "Look at those tits!"

Rob smiled. "Aww, shit, man, I'd like to get into her!"

Dan replied with a cocky smirk. "You just gotta know what you're doing, boy."

He downed the last of his whiskey and stood up, heading straight for the girl, his tall, muscular frame swaggering as he moved. He walked right up to her and started talking as she smiled receptively. Austin and Rob watched as he talked her up, and they could tell she recognized him and was impressed. They glanced at each other, clearly impressed that he was getting somewhere with her so quickly. But then something else happened. Dan stumbled slightly, and they could tell he was off-balance. He started to rub his head, and they got to their feet and reached him as he stumbled again.

"Wha's wrong?"

"I think all that whiskey just caught up with ya, buddy." Austin looked at the girl and said, "Excuse us. We're gonna get him outta here and take care of him."

They each took one of his arms and started leading him out of the bar, halfway dragging him as he stumbled towards the door. That was the last thing he knew.

Dan woke up groggily, feeling a little nauseous as he turned his head. He wondered where he was and how he got there. Not quite understanding what he was seeing, he saw that he was in a brightly-lit room decorated in soft pastel colors and that immediately around him were tall, thick wooden bars.

"The fck am I?" The words were badly slurred. "Wh' happen'?"

Nobody answered as he moved to sit up and found that his hands were covered in thick, soft material. He stared at them, perplexed for a moment before he became aware of other feelings. He was wearing soft, comfortable clothing, and there were straps on his wrists that were also connected to his thighs, preventing him from reaching up too high. There was something very thick and bulky under the outfit he was wearing that crinkled when he moved. As his mind cleared, he realized it was a diaper. What was worse was that he felt pressure and cramps in his stomach.

He struggled into a sitting position and began to yell. "Hey! Who's there? Let me out of here! Hey!"

He barely heard another voice over his yelling. "I told you he was up."

Dan turned and saw through the bars two guys coming towards him as the cramps in his stomach quickly grew worse. It took him a second to remember who they were: the guys from the bar, Austin and Rob.

"The fuck is going on here?! What're you doing?"

Austin grinned at him. "Remember our conversation about the ABDLs at the bar? Well, WE'RE ABDLs, and we don't like what you said about us. So, we cooked all this up to teach you a lesson. I slipped something in your drink when you looked away, and we caught you as you passed out. We brought you here to your new nursery, got your diaper on you, and made sure you couldn't go anywhere or take your diaper off."

"You better get me the fuck out of here right now!" Dan spoke through clenched teeth, the cramps now unbearable.

"I see you're feeling the effects of all that fiber we pumped you with. You see, Rob here is a doctor, and he knew all the drugs we'd need and how to get them. You're going to be here for quite a while, and you're going to piss and shit yourself like a fucking baby. And then we're going to bathe you, change you into fresh diapers, and feed you lots of things to make you piss constantly and shit frequently. We've been planning this for a long time now, and you're not getting out of here until we let you out."

With that, the pain and pressure finally got the better of him, and Dan exploded into his diaper. Warm, mushy shit quickly filled his seat and expanded to his crotch as he helplessly messed himself, staring at his captors with a pleading expression on his face.

"Good boy."