GITJ Tangent Story: A Special Offer, p1 by ResistanceIsFutile

a new offering by our editor-at-large, taking place at some point after where we are in the main storyline, available for our higher-tier Patrons.

A Special Offer: A GITJ Tangent Story

By ResistanceIsFutile

===========Part 1============

Harry stared out the window of his blue Ford Bronco . He had bought it just last year…before the election, before everything…happened. Things were getting weird then, were weird now and were getting even weirder by the day.

He looked out the window watching the scenery pass him by as his wife drove them to some unknown location. She insisted on driving him everywhere now. It had been months since he had gotten behind the wheel of his own goddang car. Harry had never been the type to not speak his mind, but every time he tried to bring it up she would just give him this look. Like she was looking down on him. Like this was not what he was supposed to be doing. It triggered something in his brain, something that told him to stay low and stay in his lane, so that is exactly what he did.

His wife was not someone he wanted to pick a fight with, especially since she got on this whole 'fitness' kick. It used to be cute. Like all girls she would go on these little fad diets that seemed to change every month or so, and maybe she'd meet up with her little girlfriends and go for a run. She used to talk about how important it was for her to “stay skinny for her big strong man” whenever they were alone in the bedroom. That always seemed to get him going, but now things were different.

She got into these new health food places called BOOMfoods. They had restaurants, smoothie shops, bars, and now little grocery stores. “Women only”, you know the type, and ever since then she's been a fanatic. And not just that. Her and her lady friends have been going to the gym all the time, and he hardly saw her anymore without one of those BOOMfood drinks in her hand. Apparently I wasn't allowed to have any for some reason.

It seemed to be working for her though; she was definitely putting on some mass. She looked downright formidable now that he looked at her as they drove. Dang. Those thighs look strong enough to bend steel…

Harry zoned out for a moment, transfixed by his wife's powerful beauty. She was dressed in a blue tank top and jeans, which showed off her gym-toned legs and strong shoulders. Her golden locks cascaded down her bare upper back as she kept her eyes on the road,  pretending to be unaware that her husband was drinking her all in.

God, she was so toned now! So large compared to the little slip of a thing she used to be. Her arms, her legs, her hips, her thighs. There was just so much of her to look at. Let alone her tits and ass! Yeah, her butt had grown with all the squats she talked about doing, but her boobs?? It might've been wishful thinking, but he could've sworn they had gotten bigger since she started her new fitness routine. He was a boob guy…for sure he was a boob guy, especially these days…

A slight bump in the road jolted Harry out of his daze as he began to notice just how tight his pants had gotten.

How long have I been starin’ at her? “U-uh Patricia darlin’, w-where did you say we were going again?” he stuttered suddenly, aware of just how awkward the last few minutes were as he subtly shifted himself in his seat.

“I told you that’s a secret, silly!” Patricia laughed. They’d be there soon, but still she wanted it to be a surprise. Let’s change the subject. “I think work’s been too hard on you,” she began, “You know, you should really consider that severance package they’ve been offering. Most of the men at the plant have been snapping that straight up. It’s a great deal, and it would give us the opportunity to spend soo much more time together. Doesn’t that sound nice? Like…an early retirement?”

An early retirement? he thought, But, hell woman, I'm only thirty-seven years old! Harry crossed his arms, now irritated that she would bring that up again. She knew how he felt about it. They had talked about it nearly a half dozen times by now, and he sure as hell wasn’t about to change his mind about it. “N-now honey, we’ve talked about this. You know I can’t just go and-”

“Shhhh shhh I know. We don’t need to talk about it right now. We can talk about it later. For now, why don’t you just relax and enjoy the view.” She subtly straightened her powerful shoulders accentuating her new E-cup breasts, but her efforts went unnoticed as her husband looked the other way.

After he was done making a little fuss Harry found himself returning to look out the window again. He had no idea what kind of ‘view’ Patricia was talking about: this was just another boring, run of the mill town, just outside a big city, one you could find anywhere. One that was quite far away from home. Had it been a couple of hours now? Harry wasn’t sure, he seemed to have lost track of the time. All he knew was that his legs were cramped and his butt was sore. It had been long enough, by his estimation.

They were almost at their destination, whatever it was, and Patricia had slowed the car. They’d gotten off the highway a few minutes ago. Harry stared out the window watching car after car go by when he noticed something a little off. There were a ton of cars parked along the side of the road and up on the nearby green hills surrounding the area. What exactly was going on? Traffic slowed to a crawl allowing him a better look at each parked car as they passed. It might’ve been his imagination, but he swore he could see the shadows of people inside each and every vehicle. Many were too tinted to make out who was inside, but he did manage to catch the look of a few breathtakingly gorgeous women as he drove by. They seemed oddly interested in him winking and flirting, even blowing him little kisses. He never considered himself much of a looker, so this attention really caught him off guard. He felt his face go red and embarrassment overtook him as he had trouble looking each woman in the eye, much to their private delight as they subtly laughed to themselves getting the reaction that they had so obviously been looking for.

“Everything okay sweetie?” Patricia asked with a look of amused concern on her face.

“E-everything is fine. I’m J-just fine…d-dear.”

Harry took a minute to calm himself down, careful not to look into any more car windows as they drove by. Instead he opted to look straight ahead at the long line of cars in front of them.

After a long pause he regained his composure and spoke again: “Do you happen to know why there are so many cars parked around here?” Something inside him questioned if he really wanted to know.

“Oh…I don’t know!” she laughed, “It looks like quite the turnout! Now be quiet, we’re almost there.”

Careful to keep his eyes in front of him, Harry watched as a small BOOMfood building came into view. It seemed to be what all these cars were in line for. Harry took a glance at all the empty BOOMfood cups in every cup holder of his Bronco. Had she really not gotten her fix today? If she wanted some of this stuff she could've got it back at home. This seemed like a waste of time!

But no, something was obviously different about this. For one the parking lot was jammed packed with cars. Hell people were even making new parking spaces in the grass medians and every which way they could figure just so that they could fit their car in. There were way too many cars parked around here than could ever hope to fit in that tiny little building. He must be missing something. Maybe this wasn’t the place after all? Just another (frankly ridiculous) pitstop on the way to wherever they were going?

But, sure enough, as they drove closer Harry could see that they were actually in line for the drive thru of this woman's only health food…place. Harry spotted a sign in the window as they approached saying something about a ‘Special Limited Time Offer.’

Ahhhh….Shhiittt.

Was this why they were here? Really? She drove him for hours just so she could get some more of her girly health drink? She didn’t need any more. That shit was expensive but to just save a few bucks, they came all this way?! Just think of all the gas money, and the wear on the car! His goddamn Car!

No…wait a minute. There was no need to jump the gun. He didn’t know this was why they’d made the long trip. Not for sure. And the last thing he wanted to do was complain and piss off his wife of all people. Happy wife, happy life is what they always say, and they wouldn’t say it if it weren’t true!

He needed to calm down. He needed to think about this tactically.

“So…Uhhhhh….BOOMfood eh? Seems pretty busy…”

She said nothing.

“Are you sure we need t-to…?”

His voice trailed off as his wife turned and gave him The Look. The one that could burn right through a man and see into his very soul. It used to be that he could laugh it off: let her be all mad, it was no skin off his nose. Sure he may spend a couple of nights sleeping on the couch or over at a buddy’s, but soon enough she would cool off and be his pretty little darlin’ again. Only now she wasn’t so little anymore. And something about her just seemed intimidating, terrifying even. It wasn’t just her new physical strength, it was something deeper. Maybe it was with all these changes in the government, these new laws comin’, but she had a confidence to her that got bigger every day.  That along with the fact that she was now lifting more at the gym than he weighed? He didn’t dare to think about what she might do…

She was looking down on him. He clammed right up and slouched, making himself look even smaller as he stared at the ground. This was obviously not going to be a discussion.

Time went by awkwardly as they sat in the car in silence getting closer and closer to the drive-thru window. To break the tension Harry dared to look out the window yet again. Anything to get out of this situation he put himself in.

As he looked out he realized there wasn’t much to see. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting. This was just a drive thru line after all. There were cars…and asphalt…and more cars. Eventually he found himself trying to spy up ahead. Try to get an idea of what was so ‘special’ about this place and why his wife had to drive him all the way out here. That is when he saw something interesting.

Up ahead he could see a beautiful mocha skinned beauty bent out of her driver’s side window in what looked like…a Hooters Uniform?! The white and orange uniform was plastered all  over her prodigious chest, and Harry couldn't help but stare and imagine what it would be like if she was his girlfriend, laughing as she mushed those tits into his face…

His fantasies were short lived as when she reached into the drive thru window something else immediately caught his attention. She came back holding a large tray full of drinks. At least a dozen, maybe more.

The girl must have been getting ready to host a party or something! That is just ridiculous. Imagine getting anywhere with that many drinks sloshing around in your car? he marveled, but then he saw it happen again. Another beautiful 10/10 babe leaned out from her car and came back with a tray stacked with drinks, and another, and another! There were so many that Harry still couldn’t get a good count. Not that he was trying too hard. He found himself a bit…distracted.

It seemed to him that every girl was prettier than the last. From their gorgeous faces to their nice round asses, they all had something to appreciate, and appreciate he did. The tension with his wife was forgotten as he found himself staring at girl after girl as they paraded through the  drive-thru, or walked through the parking lot. He no longer cared about how long they had to wait. He could stay here for however long it took.

Patrica looked over at Harry, her confused little hubby, and a smug smile formed on her lips. She could see his wheels turning, his mouth trying to form words as he stared adorably forward. One might think he was figuring it all out, but she knew there was nothing too complicated  going on in that little brain of his, it had all migrated down below. With him so distracted by the procession of beautiful girls, he had forgotten to cover the obvious arousal in his jeans, which was now busy giving a standing ovation to every girl who passed by.

If he thought he was hard now he had no idea what was coming next.

She let him enjoy his little show, slowly pulling up closer and closer until they were finally at the front of the line.

It was only the voice of the drive thru attendant that finally broke Harry from his girl-induced stupor.

“Oh...Patricia?? Is that you?” so nice to finally meet you! I'm Bessie, Bessie Benson from the Facebook group!”

“Oh, hi sweetie!” his wife answered, “It's so nice to finally put such a gorgeous face to the name!”

Harry marveled at the girl: Another knockout! This one, dressed in a fast food uniform, of all things! She had girl-next-door looks but, goddamn, that figure! Her waitress uniform, something calling to mind a 1950’s diner, strained to contain it, really really putting the ‘BOOM’ into ‘BOOMfood’. It left Harry even more of a drooling moron as he became lost in his perverted fantasies leaving his wife to make all the decisions and continue running the conversation.

The young girl waved off Patricia’s compliment, and praised his wife’s obvious musculature.

“Aww well thank you sugar!” Patricia said, blushing a bit as a touch of a southern drawl started to seep into her tone, “but we both know that we have you and this wonderful company you work for to thank for that!”

Bessie giggled. “Oh don’t sell yourself short!” the girl replied, “BOOMfood can only enhance the features that were already there to begin with. We just want to help you grow into the woman that you were always meant to be!” Bessie was obviously excited in earnest, but it also sounded like she was repeating some corporate tagline, something from a script.

Bessie pulled back into the window and began to move her shapely torso just out of sight. “Now let me guess you are here for-”

“For the special offer of course!” Patricia <giggled!>, a new enthusiasm bubbling up into her voice

“And here it is!” Bessie announced, pulling out a huge platter stacked with twelve large smoothies, six in pink cups on the right and six in blue cups on the left.

“Thank you!” Patricia squealed, “How much do I owe-”

“Oh, for you, it's on the house!” Bessie sang, “My mom is going to be very excited to finally meet you. In fact, in about twenty minutes we’re having a meeting here with some of the founding members of the Facebook group. You should join us!”

“Oh I-I’m not so sure-”

“Nonsense! You two will fit right in, trust me.”

Patricia paused, the two of them sharing a knowing glance as they leaned out towards one another. Bessie passing the platter of drinks to Patricia.

"Make sure he drinks them all,"  Bessie whispered.

Harry, meanwhile, was caught off guard by his wife's ass as she leaned out of the window giving him a full view.  Man, she’s really filling out those Daisy Dukes. He didn’t have long to look however before the platter of drinks was dropped in his lap. “What the hell w-!”

“Don’t you dare spill a drop!” Patricia warned in a tone that immediately got his attention.

Harry’s complaint died on his lips as a chill ran up his spine. He didn’t dare to look at her so he instead focused on keeping the drinks in his lap from toppling over as best as he could.

Satisfied, his wife turned back around, again as pleasant as could be, and smiled at Bessie. “Thank you so much. Tell your mom we will both be there ready and rarin’ to go!” after a moment adding: “You don’t happen to know a place we could-?”

“Oh don’t you worry!” Bessie answered, “We have a few spaces saved in our employee parking lot we’ve kept open for our VIP guests. Go ahead and grab one! It's over here on the left. Make sure to be careful with the speedbumps on the way there. Things are crazy out there right now! The event is such a big hit..!”

=================to be continued!=========================