Chapter 556

We followed Blade, much to his chagrin.

He walked fast, all brooding silence and trench coat drama.

I had to admit, he was very cool.

“Stop following me,” Blade muttered.

“Don’t abandon us, Blade-Senpai,” I said, and he twitched slightly.

“You’ll get yourselves killed if you stay too close. Screw off.”

“I’ve died before!” I puffed up proudly.

Thorum’s eyes widened. “You have? I’m so sorry!”

“It’s okay. It was only a bit traumatizing and life-altering.” I waved it off.

Blade stopped and turned to look at us, eyes hidden behind those stupidly cool sunglasses. Very rarely do I ever see someone who can pull off sunglasses at night.

“Why are you here?”

“We were thirsty,” Thorum answered helpfully.

“God forbid we go for a drink,” I added.

“Yes, they were very rude. We just wanted a drink.”

“Very rude,” I agreed.

He stared at us for a moment, stopping in his tracks. Then, as if deciding he didn’t want to hear any more, he turned and kept walking.

“So what’s your deal? Did a vampire kick over your sandcastle as a kid, and you swore revenge?” I asked.

“My friend, you should not ask such strange questions,” Thorum interrupted me. “Killing vampires needs not a reason.” He nodded sagely.

Who knew Thorum was packed full of so much wisdom?

Blade kept ignoring us.

He quickly ducked into a back alley and turned a few corners.

Eventually, he stopped next to a black muscle car that looked like it ran on cool one-liners and the blood of its enemies.

“Oh, shiny!” Thorum smiled happily. “What is it?”

I know Thorum was asking more about what it actually was—he didn’t know what a car is—but I was taken aback by the model. “A 1968 Mercury Cyclone GT,” I answered.

Blade actually stopped and did a double take.

“What?” I met his gaze. “I know cars.”

Well, I inherited memories of cars. Zelretch did like his own cars. He had a fondness for certain things.

He popped the trunk.

Both Thorum and I peeked over his shoulder to see what he had inside.

“That is a great many weapons,” Thorum whistled. “I like your preparedness, my friend!”

“Holy water, silver, garlic? I thought that was a myth.” I looked over things.

Blade grunted. “They don’t like the smell.”

Ah, not so much a weakness as it’s just a bit debilitating.

“Planning to overthrow Transylvania or just a really enthusiastic collector?” I asked, eyeing the various explosives alongside the guns and bladed weapons.

It looked like regular grenades, flashbangs, and some others I didn’t recognize.

Blade ignored me and reached for a stake.

Then he froze.

His head snapped upward. He stared past the alley roofline.

I followed his gaze.

Shadows flicked across the rooftop. Fast. Dozens of vampires—not flying, but moving with that inhuman gliding-leap speed. They seemed a bit better trained than the ones we had met earlier. They looked more like... hunters, I suppose.

“Don’t vampires have better senses?” I looked at Blade-Senpai. “Why didn’t they come running after us?” Because we were... kind of covered in vampire blood, something they should be able to smell, honestly.

Then he looked at us and scowled deeply. “I’ve sprayed my car down with a special mix of stuff I’ve developed. Makes it hard to sniff out vamp blood when nearby so I don’t get tracked.”

He said it through gritted teeth—as if he realized something.

Then I realized it too, and both Thorum and I smiled brightly.

“Get in the car,” he finally grumbled.

Blade-Senpai is a good person. He didn’t want to leave us to ‘die’ at the hands of the vampires. Because in his eyes, if he just up and left, as soon as he was gone, they’d be running right at us.

“Shotgun!” I declared.

Thorum beamed as he climbed into the back, folding himself in awkwardly. “Is there ale on this ride?”

“Didn’t you steal some of the good stuff from the bar?”

“Oh yes, I almost forgot!” Thorum took out one of the most expensive bottles from the place and chugged it like it was some dollar beer.

Blade slid into the driver’s seat, but he didn’t immediately start the car.

“...So, is this the part where we introduce ourselves and give backstories?” I asked.

Blade took a deep breath. “Who are you, and why were you in the bar?”

“I’m Wilhelm Henry Schweinorg!” I happily called out. “And I wanted a drink with my friend.”

“Aye, I’m Thorum. I, too, wished to drink with my friend. It has been many days since we last met, and I wished to catch up!”

Blade looked at us incredulously. “You both were there by chance?”

“Yup.”

“Yes!”

Blade seemed to just groan again.

He finally turned the key, and the Cyclone’s engine roared to life, and he quickly flew us out of there, hitting the road with very few other cars on the street.

After a minute of silence, I leaned my elbow on the window. “So... what were you doing at the bar, anyway?”

Blade didn’t answer.

“You weren’t there for karaoke night, were you?” I didn’t take him as the type, but I also didn’t want to assume; that would be rude.

Thorum perked up. “Do they sing? I like singing.”

Blade exhaled through his nose. “It was a low-priority nest. Small-time leeches. I was going to wipe it out to draw attention away from one of their major locations.”

I blinked. “Like a diversion?”

Blade nodded. “There’s a club not far from here; I wanted to draw away some of their guards.” He grunted. “They have extra hands when there’s a farm involved.”

“And you just happened to run into us.” I nodded.

“Aye, how fortuitous!” Thorum smiled brightly. 

Blade glanced in the rearview mirror. “Yeah. Lucky me.”

“We appreciate your kindness, Blade-Senpai,” I said sincerely.

“Aye. You are a good man.” Thorum nodded with a warm smile.

Blade looked like he regretted every life choice that led him to this exact moment.

And the night wasn’t even close to over.

“I just had a thought.” I spoke up again. “Why didn’t any police show up?” Because there was very clearly gunfire, and it’s not like we were in a deserted place. Its a…fairly normal street, if not a particularly popular one.

Sure, there was, like, no one on the streets, but that could be because of numerous reasons.

Blade kept his head straight, focused on the road. “This is vamp territory.” He grunted as if it were some obvious conclusion. “Police aren’t going to come around these parts unless they get called by their vamp masters.

Huh, that’s pretty messed up.

“When you say masters…..”

“Thralls, paid off, whatever you think it means, then you’re probably right.” Blade explained.

“...kink play?” I asked.

Blade looked at me deadpan, but he didn’t say I was wrong.

Well, if there weren’t reasons to go vampire hunting before,.

Though, maybe I shouldn’t throw stones from my glass house when it comes to fetishes. I am quite literally having sex with my Grandmother and in a relationship with her.

I wasn’t really keeping track all too well, but he seemed to have taken a large detour, doing a sort of large loop around. Despite us not having gone very far, we ended up driving for a bit.

They were close enough that a bunch of vampires came flying over almost immediately, so it makes sense that they were nearby.

But it’s surprising how careful Blade is.

He seemed like the type to drive his car right through a building while throwing Molotovs and doing donuts on their burning corpses.

But what do I know?

He found another sort of deserted alleyway with good positioning and exits to park his car.

“Stay in the car.” He grunted.

We got out and followed him. He didn’t even say anything when we looked over his shoulder as he popped his trunk again and started taking out equipment.

“Guns, nice.” I reached for one, and he slapped my hand away.

“Don’t touch that.” He slapped my hand away. “You’re not coming.”

“Why not?” Thorum asked with a sad tone.

“I’m not going to waste my time looking out for two drunk idiots while in the middle of hundreds of damn vamps.”

“Well, there seem to be two options here. Either we come anyways without weapons, or you strap us up and help you.” I gave a smile.

He stared at me for a long minute. “Do you even know how to use a gun?” He gave me a once-over.

I met his gaze and picked up the gun I was eyeing. “MP5,” I announced, grabbing one of the many cartridges. “.22 LR.” I introduced the bullet type before slapping it into the gun and pulling the bolt back like I had done this before and slung it over my shoulder after flicking the safety. 

He raised an eyebrow and then turned to Thorum, who was looking at what looked like a Desert Eagle, and he was trying to put a bullet down the front of the barrel. 

“Take the clip and slide it into the bottom, then pull the top back to load the chamber.” I pointed out the parts to Thorum.

He wasn’t dumb; he had never handled a gun before, but it’s not like it was rocket science.

Though, I was surprised he was packing . 22 in my case. It’s a small caliber, and it’s being used against vampires.

Though my nose twitched, and I detected the faint waft of something holy.

Oh damn, did he soak the bullets in holy water?

Smart, but that must have taken weeks of soaking to get this resilient effect. But a smaller caliber bullet with holy-infused dampness would be better than a normal, stronger caliber in this case.

“.....I can’t believe I’m doing this.” Blade muttered. “I’m giving guns to drunk idiots to shoot vampires with.” He said with utter disbelief. “If you both die, it’s not my fault. And if you get turned, I’m putting bullets in your heads.”

“Okay.”

“Tis a fair stance.” Thorum nodded.

Blade just further looked at us incredulously.

“Hey, didn’t you say we stink of vamp juices? Won’t they detect us if we get close?”

Blade growled lightly. “No, there’s enough blood in the air around here that they aren’t smelling anything else.”

…ominous.

“That sounded ominous.” Thorum spoke.

I smiled because we were on the same brainwave.

“Stick close.” He hissed under his breath. “And if you shoot me, you won’t like the consequences.”

I’m surprised he’s putting up with us, but I suppose he doesn’t have much of a choice.

“Wait!” I stopped him; his steps forward stopped abruptly. I took out two pairs of sunglasses, handing one to Thorum. “Alright, now we’re good.” 

We all matched!

Blade twitched again slightly but didn’t say anything as he moved with a purpose.

A few turns of the alleys, and it opened up to see a sort of industrial district.

There was a particular warehouse; you could see lights faintly against the windows, if barely in the night, but they were heavily blackened.

With my hearing, I could faintly hear a certain thrumming and vibrations coming from it as well. It was very clearly soundproofed and…lightproofed?

But as he said, there was music coming from there.

“Follow me, stick close, and don’t make noise unless you have no other choice.” He intoned, moving without giving us a chance to respond.

He danced between buildings and cover, and I could see a bunch of guards around the place.

There were a few on the roof and a few seemingly walking around out front aimlessly. 

As we followed and got closer, the vibrations and thrumming of the indoor music got louder and more pronounced. I had to admire the scale at which they soundproofed such a massive building, because they did a pretty good job.

Blade moved quickly, his weapons flying out, and he took down a few of the guards without noise, and he gestured for us to follow at a lull between guards.

All three of us braced up against the side of the warehouse, inching towards the main entrance out of sight.

The main door was massive—an industrial steel slab of reinforced metal with a sliding peephole at eye level. It all but screamed of nefarious purposes!

As if on cue, the peephole slid open, revealing a pair of glowing red eyes.

“Password?” a gruff voice demanded.

I stepped forward with confidence. “Count Chocula is a real vampire.” I answered with full confidence.

“.....”

“Cow blood tastes like milk.” Thorum added.

“Daylight Savings Time is a hate crime!” I blurted out.

Blade’s eye twitched.

Thorum’s eyes lit up. “Bloody Mary!” 

Ah, he just learned that drink name from earlier, I think.

But shit, that was a good one.

“Sunblock gang?”

“No reflection, no problem!”

Blade’s fingers twitched toward his weapons as the man behind the door grew continuously skeptical.

“Stop!” Blade growled under his breath.

“Twilight Fan Club Annual Meeting?” I grinned.

“Wait,” the guy behind the door said. “That one.”

We all blinked.

The door opened. “If you know the password, just say it the first time.” The vampire rolled his eyes.

The music hit us immediately; it was loud and obnoxious, exactly what you would find at a rave.

Blade stepped forward and, without hesitation, stabbed the vampire in the chest with a stake. The guy let out a startled gasp before slumping to the ground.

I pointed my gun and shot at another, and Thorum hit the third that was standing guard across the face with the gun in his hand.

Blade seemed particularly annoyed at the moment; I couldn’t guess why.

It seemed like the building had been converted to a club; we only had to head through a few doors to reach the main floor, where we could see hundreds of people with a bunch of lights and music still muffled somewhat.

However, also rather noticeable was that there was a light red drizzle from above.

I didn’t need to get any closer to smell the scent of blood; it was pungent even from this distance.

“Come on, we need to find the control room.” He grunted, taking us in another direction, through some side doors.

It was loud enough that we didn’t really need to worry about making a commotion.

In the first room we burst into, there were probably about a dozen vampires all sitting around that all got startled when we walked in.

There was a moment before everyone started moving.

Blade threw out his shurikens, and Thorum threw his gun at one of them before tackling another.

I did a tactical roll and started spraying bullets.

Guns are fun.

I don’t know how much I was helping, but I sure shot a lot of them.

Eventually, it seemed to quiet down as all of them stopped moving, with Blade standing over the last of them as they drew their last breath.

He didn’t say much still, opting to keep pushing forward, opening the next door. We ascended a pair of stairs that seemed to take us to the top of the warehouse, where I would assume the officers would normally be.

However, what greeted us was most certainly not what I had anticipated.

If there was something capable of sobering me up instantly, it was probably this.

There were glass cylinders filling up almost the entire area. Inside each of them was an infant, a child probably not even one year old.

There were tubes connected to all of them, blood running from them into a mechanism that I followed with my eyes. I then looked out the windows that peered down onto the rave happening below.

The hundreds of vampires dancing and partying with no care in the world.

I then eyed the sprinkler system that was gradually spraying down blood on top of them and then back to the system.

It wasn’t hard to put two and two together.

No one said anything, but Blade seemed less taken aback than us.

I went to the nearest baby to check their condition. 

Thorum looked at me, and I shook my head.

I methodically checked every single one.

They were all dead or might as well be. Any kind of higher brain functions were gone due to the constant siphoning of blood, even if there were still heartbeats.

“The younger the blood, the sweeter the taste.” Blade spoke as if answering the question I was about to ask.

“Ah.” I said simply, taking off the gun slung over my shoulder and setting it down, not feeling like having fun anymore. “Do you know who’s responsible?”

I kept my tone from showing my emotions, I think, but maybe he could tell.

Blade went to a nearby computer and started messing with it. “Yeah, I’ve been after this bastard for a while. This is the first time I’ve gotten this close. One of his trusted people runs the place below, and….” He paused. “He’s nearby. You two get back to the car; I’m going after the boss.”

“What about all the other vampires here?” Thorum asked.

Blade looked conflicted for a moment. “Better to get the big bastard; he’s the one who sets places like this up.”

Well, I couldn’t really argue with him there.

“I’ll go kill him and then come back.” Blade said again, grabbing what he needed off the computer, very clearly implying that he needed to go alone.

Again, I wasn’t in the mood to keep playing around, so I didn’t insist on following or giving him a hard time.

Thorum and I shared a look after he left.

He, too, was no longer in a joking mood.

“Mind if I call someone to join us?” I asked.

“My friend, please bring whoever you want.” Thorum, he said politely.

@***@

Thorum and I walked back downstairs, and without any hesitation, pushed open the main doors to enter the actual club portion.

Again, the soundproofing was on point because the volume intensified by magnitudes just from a single door beforehand.

No one even bats an eye our way. It was hard, I suppose, in this situation, to just eyeball someone to know they’re not a vampire.

I turned my head, getting a better look at the place. I cast a small spell to keep the blood off of me as I took everything in.

A DJ was at the front on an elevated stage, and there were cages with people inside, dancing along. There were a few fresh corpses hanging by hooks and chains, dripping blood down onto the crowd. 

There was also a set of stairs on the opposite side of the room that led up to a sort of balcony or a more VIP area with a few guards.

Actually, there were several guards placed around the room.

I pat Thorum’s shoulder. “Guard the door.” I didn’t need to speak loud; he heard me enough.

I walked to the edge of the room and traced the wall as I made my way around the crowd. I found one of the guards, black suit, sunglasses too…it made me take mine off and toss them to the ground.

He noticed me, barely moved, and it looked like he was about to ask me what I wanted because I was heading right to him.

I swiped my hand, slicing his head clean from his shoulders, grabbing it by the hair so it didn’t hit the ground with the rest of his body, and I kept walking until I was about as close to the stage as I could be.

And I unceremoniously tossed the severed head at the DJ.

The music stopped with an abrupt screech of the equipment and a shriek by the DJ as it hit his equipment.

The suddenness caused the crowd to abruptly follow along too, as they all stopped dancing and started looking around in bewilderment.

I saw someone in a well-kept suit, looking like it cost close to what I usually wear, come to the edge of the balcony—the VIP area—looking around as he too looked confused and eyed the severed head that still freaked out the DJ.

I made myself known, walking up onto the stage from the corner; all eyes in the room fell on me.

For so many people in one room, it was oddly quiet.

I came to the edge of the stage and sat down, letting my legs dangle.

The guy up top leaned on the railing, looking mildly amused. “Well, that’s certainly one way to introduce yourself. I had thought this evening would be a bore, but it seems we have a guest!”

I glanced up at him but didn’t really feel like responding with something witty or humorous.

“Come now, introduce yourself. What purpose does a human like yourself have to spoil our good time, hmm?”

As soon as he said the word ‘human,’ it’s like a tone shifted. The startled and confused looks turned more…predatory.

They were eyeing me like a piece of meat.

I took out my phone, but it was on speaking, and I began to dial.

The guy up top frowned. “I’m not used to being ignored, but I’m willing to overlook it because of how bored I am. Now, come, entertain me a bit more, and I won’t have you torn limb from limb.”

At that, there was hissing and growls. The whole room sounded like an engine, and it seemed to vibrate the building like the music from before.

He frowned deeper. “I know, let’s play a game. How about – “

“Silencio!” I didn’t shout, but the words boomed over all of them, utterly deafening everyone here. I could see a new wave of shock and confusion sweep over them. Even the guy up top looked utterly startled and entered into a small state of panic as he opened his mouth but couldn’t speak. “It’s polite to be quiet when someone is making a call.” I said it simply, my voice the only noise, and it could be heard by everyone within the room.

The phone rang a couple of times until the other side picked up.

“This is Agent Coulson.” The voice responded.

“Hey Coulson, it’s Wilhelm.”

”Wilhelm, is anything the matter?” He asked.

“Possibly. I have you on speaker.” I told him, because it’s exceedingly rude to not tell someone they’re on speaker when talking. “I’m currently in a warehouse slash club, with….I’d call it just under three hunder vampires.”

They stared, unmoving, like a deer caught in headlights.

“Is that so?” Coulson returned.

“Yeah, you see I’m in a bit of a situation, and I wanted to ask something. There are no laws against killing roughly…three hundred vampires, are there?”

The voice on the other end didn’t respond immediately. “Is there a reason for you doing so?”

“I found a few dozen infants being used as blood bags inside the building.” I said without elaborating further. 

“Ah.” His response was almost the same as mine. “Vampires are considered a hostile invasive species.”

“Wonderful.”

“I assume you’re calling to inform me to help with the cleanup?” He asked.

“I figured you would want to know.” I would have called him about the bar as well when I was back in my right mind. “Would you like me to keep any alive?”

“If there are any leaders among the bunch, or anyone important, it would be appreciated.” He said rather casually. “Give me the location; I’ll send a few teams your way.”

“I’ll text it to you in a few.” I replied. “Thanks, Coulson.”

“My pleasure.” He seemed genuine when he said that too.

I hung up and put my phone away. “Okay, you can speak again.” I dismissed my spell, and it was like a wave washed over them; a new tension hung in the room.

“You’re not a normal human then.” The VIP man spoke. “However, a human is still a human. And there are over three hundred of my kin here. What could you possibly hope to accomplish?”

“Heh.” I couldn’t help it; I cuckold slightly.

He frowned again. “And what’s so funny?”

Slowly, shadows crawled up the walls. It wasn’t obvious at first; my lack of response seemed to grate on him until he noticed and took a step back.

The shadows unnaturally overtaking every corner of the building.

And then, the red eyes appeared.

I think, normally, I would banter a bit more. Maybe give him a cheeky comment, make him angry before finally killing him.

But honestly, I just wasn’t in the mood.

He was right to an extent; I wouldn’t be the one doing things.

To accompany the many glowing red eyes, different appendages seemed as if they were trying to push through the shadows. Limbs covered in white bone plating or spikes. Sharp teeth jutting out, trying to break free. The half-malformed shape of distorted, shadowy animals, roaring with a barely held-back bloodlust.

Salem then walked out of the shadows, stepping next to me.

I wanted them to suffer, and Salem was very good at what she does.

@***@

A/N

Blade: WTF happened when I was away?
Coulson: WTF happened while I was away?
Fury: Stop fucking with my week!

Had a fun thought. Salem doesn’t really have a ‘secondary’ world that she sort of visits, not like the others. Shield is looking for magical consultants; Salem’s interest might be piqued if the conditions are right.