Vixen's Mistress Chapter 46: Curtain

“Rayne, you’re not even playing,” Hamish chided. Though Rayne and Hamish sat on the settees at the center of room, the lady was clearly watching Kaden and Margret's card game by the window with too much intent.

“It’s entertainment. Why wouldn’t I want to watch?” The game had only started but Rayne had already counted two less optimal plays made by Kaden. If he kept with this style of play the game was going to take hours before either of them won.

Hamish’s words were quiet, “Because you make Margret nervous constantly watching like that.” There was always a period just an hour or two after Margret’s arrival where it was clear she was starting to regret coming and wanted to go home. It would eventually pass and she would become quite comfortable again, and a few years ago Kaden had found the best way to help during that time was to distract her with a game. Specifically a game Rayne wasn’t involved in playing. “Just let them play their game.”

“Fine,” Rayne said, turning back around. Not sure what else to do Rayne decided to push Hamish a little more about this Lady Whitlock. “How long have you and Lady Whitlock been friends? I don’t remember you two being close in previous seasons.” The sigh Hamish let out, knowing he had done this to himself was a little pleasing to Rayne.

“I’ve always wondered about how you find these things out so fast. You’re never one for much gossip, so who are you talking to?”

“A lady must have some secrets,” Rayne said with a smile. “You’re also not answering the question.”

“No, I am not,” Hamish said with a large smile.

“Well, I suppose I’ll just have to find out in my own ways.” The smile left Hamish’s face and Rayne couldn’t help but smirk.

“Can you let your brother have no secrets of his own?”

Rayne had the urge to say something witty, but she didn’t. She really didn’t like her brother’s keeping secrets, but that was so incredibly hypocritical of her. The smirk left her face. “Alright.” Before Rayne could think of how to follow that up, the door to the sitting room opened. Eda stood at the door, with a neutral look on her face, but her actions clearly betrayed the nerves she clearly felt. The only time Eda would open a door without knocking was when there was something wrong.

“My lady, might I speak with you for a moment?”

“Please excuse me,” Rayne said to Hamish before standing up. It didn’t take her long to get out of the room, nor did it take either of the women long to hurry a few steps deeper into the hall where no one could hear. “What’s wrong?” There was no point in beating around the bush.

Eda took a breath before speaking, which was never a good sign. “Stewart came to me quite worried about Hannah. Apparently after being introduced to Damian, Margret’s beastkin, she ran off sobbing.”

The sudden and intense anxiety that blossomed in Rayne’s chest was a little terrifying. “Why?” Somehow her words were gentle, even in the face of someone having made Hannah cry.

“Hannah assumed he would be from Everlial because he’s a rare breed called a snow leopard and they come from close to where Hannah lived. He’s actually from the Empire and said he thought beastkin came from the Empire. That was the point at which she ran off.”

Though the anxiety didn’t lessen, the slight anger she had felt at Damian disappeared. This wasn’t his fault. “Where is she now?” Eda didn’t respond right away and that terrified Rayne.

“I’ve been searching for over half an hour and I can’t find her.”

The blood pumping inside of Rayne ran cold. Her mind struggled to put a coherent sentence together but somehow she found herself asking, “Where have you looked?”

“The library, her bedroom, the bathroom, your study, your room, your sitting room, other sitting rooms… I just can’t find her.”

The thrum of panic growing inside of Rayne was almost too overwhelming. Before you should even think of a response, her body was moving in the direction of the library. She didn’t want to doubt Eda’s efforts in finding Hannah considering how much she trusted the older woman, but she wouldn’t be comfortable till she had checked all those places herself. Eda followed right behind her. “Have you checked the gardens?” There were plenty of small places to hide on the grounds outside.

“No.” There was a lot of shame in Eda’s voice. “I’ll go check there now.”

The library was empty as Eda had said and Rayne felt her heart starting to sink. Her feet carried her down the halls to Hannah’s bedroom, but her mind was stuck on the idea of Hannah having run away. What was she going to do if her fox had truly run off? It was disgusting to know that there was some part of her that would want to hire someone to track Hannah down. Even though doing so would go against her beliefs on slavery a part of her mind tried to convince her it would be best for Hannah’s safety. A lone beastkin trying to run away to Goddess knows where through the depths of the Dewath Empire was not an easy or even survivable task.

When it became apparent that Hannah was not in her room at first glance, Rayne couldn’t help but get on her hands and knees to check if Hannah was under the bed. Rayne had hidden under the bed a few times as a child, and though she was most certainly too large to do that now, Hannah was still quite small. The tightening grip the anxiety had on Rayne’s heart only grew with not finding her under the bed.

The bathroom was empty and so was every room Rayne checked in on the way to her study. Every second that went by felt almost like a chilling stab in the heart. Who knew such fear and anxiety could make one feel so cold. Of course as Eda had said the study was empty. Tears were starting to brim in Rayne’s eyes as she hurried to her sitting room, not knowing where else Hannah might have hidden herself away. Well there were plenty of other rooms to hide in, but Rayne just felt if Hannah had hidden herself she would have done it in a familiar room. 

Rayne’s hands were shaking as they wiped away the tears upon finding the sitting room empty. Had Hannah run away? She prayed to the Goddess that Hannah hadn’t left, but she couldn’t be mad if her fox had run away. Even though she knew Hannah wasn’t in the room she still found herself searching every nook and cranny for her fox. She was nowhere to be found. 

The tears were getting harder to wipe away as she found herself going into her bedroom. Maybe Hannah had hidden herself here. Eda had already looked, but Rayne just needed somewhere to keep looking. Some form of hope that there were still places the fox could be. There was no sight of the fox at first glance and that cold grip on Rayne’s heart only got tighter. She opened her closet to find no one hiding there, and she even checked under her bed to no avail. Rayne had to use both hands to wipe away the tears on her face as she made the way to her door, trying to think of where else to look.

A gentle breeze blew through the open window, and Rayne turned to look back to the windows. The breeze always made her feel calmer in the mornings and she so dearly wished it would now, but it didn’t. Even the gentle sway of the curtains didn’t bring her comfort as they normally might. However, one of them didn’t sway like the rest and stayed in place as if being held down by something inside of it. Blood was roaring in Rayne’s ears as she practically ran to the curtain. Without hesitation Rayne pulled the curtain away from the wall to find her fox curled up inside.

“Hannah,” Rayne said, dropping to her knees beside the vixen in relief. Without hesitation Rayne reached out and turned Hannah’s face to look at her. The fox’s eyes were red and puffy while tear stains streaked down her cheeks.

Hannah stared back at Rayne’s face that had the same look her dad had when she did this as a kit. The fear, panic, tears, and relief were all so clear, just like her dad’s. Even the way Rayne’s eyes scanned over her, checking to see if she had hurt herself. She had always made him so very afraid whenever she hid like this. “I’m sorry.” Her words were the same as she would have said to her dad. His face was filling her mind.

There was a strange sense of relief at hearing Hannah’s voice, even if she didn’t understand the words. Clearly Hannah’s words had meant something and even though Rayne knew it wasn’t her fault for not understanding them, she still felt so guilty as she said, “I don’t understand.”

The visions of Hannah’s father faded away and Hannah was back with Rayne. “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to be sorry,” Rayne said without hesitation. Hannah had nothing to be sorry for. “You don’t need to be sorry, Hannah. I’m just relieved you’re alright.”

Again, Rayne continued to mimic Hannah’s dad, even with her words. The tears had dried up minutes ago, but now they were starting to come again. Hannah missed her dad so much. “C-can I…” The words died in her mouth, realizing that it wasn’t something a slave like her should ever ask of her owner. That didn't stop her from wanting to do it. It was what she always asked her dad for after moments like this too.

Rayne didn’t like seeing Hannah actively hesitate to ask something. Her fox should be able to ask for anything she wanted. “Can you what?” When Hannah continued to hesitate, but the tears on her face were starting to run again, Rayne insisted. “You can ask, Hannah.”

Shyly Hannah looked away. All the times it had happened before between the two of them, it hadn’t ever really been asked for on either side. But they had done it quite a few times. “Can… Can I hug you…” The tears were coming a little harder again, but not anywhere near the sobs of earlier.

There was that fluttering feeling in Rayne’s stomach at Hannah’s words. The two had shared very intimate moments. Rayne playing with Hannah’s ears every night was a great example of that. The two had even hugged quite a few times as well. Granted most of those times hadn’t been in the happiest of moments, and right now wasn’t technically one either. Even with all that having happened between the two, Hannah asking to simply hug her felt monumental. “O-of course.” Rayne quickly realized the stutter might have made it sound like she was hesitant. “Of course you can, Hannah.” This time there was no hesitation in her voice.

Though Rayne had given Hannah permission, the vixen still hesitated to do what she so dearly wanted. The two had never shared a hug that they both agreed to beforehand and this change felt very powerful to Hannah. She wondered if it felt that way to Rayne too, or maybe that was just Hannah’s crush on Rayne tinting her view. Hannah’s movements weren’t quick like the other time she had hugged Rayne, or even like Rayne had hugged her. The gentle ease at which Hannah’s arms wrapped around Rayne felt almost more intimate than any moment they had shared yet.

Rayne internally reveled in how gentle Hannah’s movements were to hug her. She reveled in the warmth of Hannah against her even more as her own arms wrapped around the fox. It felt almost perfect the way Hannah’s head gentle nuzzled against the side  her own as they settled into the hug. The fluttering in Rayne’s stomach didn’t die down at all and Rayne was terrified that with Hannah’s exceptional hear that her fox would hear how hard her heart was pounding.

Tears were flowing again, but this time it didn’t feel bad to Hannah. Her heart didn’t hurt the same way it had before. In fact it even felt a little good to cry right now. To cry in the arms of the woman she desperately wanted to be close with. “I haven’t done something like that in a long time,” Hannah said with a quiet voice. There was no need to be loud with how close her head was to Rayne’s. “My dad hated it so much when I did it as a kit. It made him worry so much and I’m sorry if I’ve made you feel that way.”

Rayne gently shook her head, feeling more tears of her own drip down her face at Hannah’s words. “You don’t need to be sorry. Yes, I was worried, but…” The lady wasn’t quite sure how to finish that sentence without saying something about how deeply she cared about Hannah. It was probably clear to Hannah that Rayne did care about her to a good degree, but the extent of which most certainly wasn’t known. Still, she worried that if she didn’t finish the sentence it would make Hannah feel bad. “…sometimes it’s nice to worry about someone because it means you have someone you care for.”

Hannah couldn’t help but squeeze Rayne just a little bit harder at the lady’s words. Of course looking back at all the things that had happened it was clear that Rayne cared about her, but for some reason Hannah’s brain hadn’t put it into those terms. At least not so clearly. Hearing Rayne say she cared about her made the fox’s tail start to wag as her heart started to beat a good bit faster. “Thank you,” was all she could manage to say.

“You don’t need to thank me, Hannah.” Rayne’s own arms squeezed Hannah just a little harder as well. A comfortable silence grew between the two as they both just relaxed in the comfort of each other’s arms. Feeling Hannah shift in her arms, she realized that her eyes had come to a close while they held each other. Opening them revealed Hannah to be looking to the door of the bedroom, though she didn’t pull away from Rayne.

Normally Hannah would have probably pulled away from Rayne at the sound of someone approaching, but the sound of jingling keys let Hannah know who it was beforehand. Was it strange that she didn’t feel strange to have Eda see Rayne and her like this? The elder woman quickly came into view at the doorway just a few moments later. The instant Eda’s eyes landed on the pair it was so very clear how relieved she felt, even if she didn’t have expressive ears and a tail.

Rayne watched as Eda went to say something but stopped herself. The older woman’s eyes just took in Hannah and Rayne openly holding each other in front of her for a few more seconds. Then Eda gave Rayne a gentle smile and nod before turning to walk away.

It wasn’t until Hannah heard Eda’s footsteps fade away before she spoke again. “I should probably get back to work.” Though she said that she made no move to pull away from Rayne. Who would ever want to leave this woman’s arms? They were so warm.

“Take all the time you need before you do first. Take the day even.” If there was anyone deserving of taking a few days off of work it was Hannah.

“The half day off isn’t until tomorrow.” Hannah internally berated herself for saying such a thing when she did trust in Rayne’s words.

With the rush of Margret arriving, Rayne hadn’t thought much about tomorrow being a half day for the staff. She hadn’t even made any plans for Hannah and herself. Nor any for Margret, though that was more up to Margret’s decision than Rayne’s. “The staff can take more time off than just the days permanently scheduled. I’m sure you’ve seen or heard of at least one or two taking some time off already.”

Hannah shook her head. At least as far as she was aware none of the staff in her past ten days hadn’t taken extra time off. Well, maybe except Ms. Vera and the kitchen staff, but they weren't necessarily needed all day every day. Just when meals needed to be prepared.

That was a little surprising. The Hayward household was well known for allowing reasonable time off for the staff. Or maybe that was just because most noble houses were staffed with slaves that didn’t get any time off. “Well, we do. I know during the season the staff can tend to take a good amount of time to themselves. With all the events during the days and gatherings many nights a week, we aren’t in desperate need of all the staff at all times.” Of course there was an exception when this estate was the one hosting such a thing, but Rayne was confident Hannah could figure that out on her own.

“Does that mean we aren’t going to have our nights together anymore when the season starts?”

Rayne opened her mouth to say something, but no words came out. That was not something Rayne had thought about. “W-well, not every night goes so late.” She held onto Hannah just a little tighter. “And not every week has the same number of events. So maybe one or two… maybe three nights a week I will be out…” If Hannah didn’t have to get up early and work Rayne might have suggested just staying up later to see one another.

Reading people was not Hannah’s strong suit, but to her it sounded as if Rayne hadn’t considered that before. She might even have sounded a little apologetic about it. It wasn’t Rayne’s fault that this was how her society functioned. There was no reason for Rayne to feel bad. Of course Hannah didn’t like the idea of not getting to spend time with Rayne every night, but she tried to find a silver lining. “Maybe… maybe that won’t be so bad. It would give us more to talk about when we do see each other.”

It was easy to see what Hannah was trying to do and Rayne was very thankful for that. “I’m sure I will have lots of funny noble drama to tell you about.” Gossip wasn’t normally something Rayne liked, but maybe Hannah would get some enjoyment out of it.

Hannah had to admit she was a little bit curious about what kind of drama went on in noble human society. “It would also give me more time to read my book.” The fox’s heart started to pound a little at the next words she wanted to say. “And if I finish it, maybe we could go to the bookstore again?” Rayne had already told her that she would take Hannah again, but being the one to ask now made her feel all fuzzy inside. Who would have ever thought Hannah would get to ask to go out with a crush again?

The idea of taking Hannah to the bookstore again filled Rayne with so much glee. Not only that but Hannah was asking to do that. Granted it wouldn’t be until she finished her book, but Hannah was still asking to be taken out. That felt like a massive step, and one that continued to feed the gentle butterflies that had yet to leave Rayne’s belly. “If you're as fast a reader as I suspect you are, we’ll have to get you a bookshelf for your room sooner rather than later.”

Without even thinking Hannah pulled back from the hug just enough to look Rayne in the eyes. Tears were so common with Hannah today, but for the first time they were happy tears. “You would get me a bookshelf?” Her voice was barely a whisper, but it was so clearly filled with hope.

Rayne gave Hannah a smile. “Of course I would.”

If Hannah hadn’t been so stunned that she would have her very own bookshelf again, she would have kissed Rayne.

Falling for those wide yellow eyes was so easy and it so dearly made Rayne wonder how they would look if she kissed Hannah. “This is your home, Hannah. You should be able to fill your room however you wish, just like any other person here. So all you need to do is ask and I’ll get you whatever you wish.”

Hannah knew her face was mostly blank in awe of Rayne, but her still slightly sore tail was doing its damn best to show just how happy she was. Rayne really wasn’t helping Hannah move past the deep desire to kiss her. Just kissing someone without permission wasn’t right though, so the vixen held herself back.

Rayne was in awe that she had made Hannah’s tail wag like it had yesterday after calling her a good girl. She had been so sure she was going to have to work harder than just share her honest feelings to make it do that again. Even though Hannah was so clearly happy, there was an ever so slight nagging worry in the back of Rayne’s mind. One that made her face start to turn a little red as she thought about it. “I-I worry that might have made me sound a little materialistic.” Why had she said that? “Though if you looked in my closet I’m sure you would find I am a little.”

Hearing the lady stutter a little brought Hannah out of her shocked daze and back into the moment. Rayne looked embarrassed and Hannah didn’t like that. Quickly Hannah started to put one word in front of the other in hopes of making her feel better. “I don’t think I’ve seen you wear the same outfit twice yet.” That was the absolute wrong thing to say! Why had she said that?

Somehow those words made Rayne give a genuine little laugh. Hannah was not wrong, and the clear look of worry on Hannah’s face at what she had just said only made the fox look cuter than she already was. “You’re probably right. I really love clothes.” The smile came back to Rayne’s face. “I suppose what I actually wanted to convey is that I don’t want you to feel pressured into asking for something that you don’t want. I have most certainly made people feel pressured into asking for something in the past. Mainly my brothers, and I really don’t want that to happen here. I still don’t know you well enough yet to know if you’re a person who likes to have a lot of things, but I would love to find out.”

Now it was Hannah’s turn for her face to turn red. Normally she was one to hold eye contact a little too long when talking with someone, but right now Hannah found herself looking away. “I… I haven’t thought about things that I want in a very long time.”

“And there’s no need to rush.”

Though Rayne said that, Hannah’s mind was trying to think of things that she liked. Rayne wanted to know if Hannah was the kind of person that liked things, and it was hard to remember if she was. Sometimes Hannah found that the best way to remember something was to start doing something else, so maybe it really was time to get back to work. Then a new thought occurred to Hannah. “I should probably apologize to Damian.”

Rayne gave a gentle nod. “Maybe also go tell Mr. Williams that you are alright. He was the one who came to Eda worried.”

That was a little surprising but Hannah nodded her affirmation. This was the time to let go now, but Hannah really didn’t want to. It took a little time of silently waiting before she managed to pull her arms away from Rayne.

Though Hannah pulled away, Rayne was a little hesitant to do the same. She still let go, worrying that continuing to hold onto her fox would make her feel uncomfortable. “Are you sure you’re alright to get back to it?”

Hannah nodded again. “It’ll help me to think and focus on something other than upsetting things.”

It was very easy for Rayne to relate to that. Sometimes distraction wasn’t as bad as some people made it out to be. With that Rayne finally got up from her knees and Hannah followed behind her. “Shall we?” Rayne asked, gesturing to the door.

Hannah would have very much preferred to stay with Rayne a little while longer, but she really did want to apologize to Damian. It would be terrible to leave that as his first impression of her. As they made their way to the door Hannah paused in her steps. “Pillows and blankets.”

The fox’s words gave Rayne pause as she looked over at Hannah.

It was difficult to meet Rayne’s eyes again as she felt her face heat up a little. “I really liked having lots of soft blankets and pillows. Though here it is a lot warmer than back home so blankets might be too much. I still do really like having lots of big soft pillows to snuggle up into.”

Knowing this was going to be dangerous because Rayne knew she was going to buy Hannah no end of pillows. Though Rayne wanted to ask more about the pillows to make sure she got the right ones, the real question she was pondering was how to buy all those pillows without Eda getting mad at her. “Maybe we can go have a look around at some point and you can show me what kind of pillows you like.”

How long was it going to take for Hannah’s tail to get used to wagging so much again, because it being so sore was getting annoying. That still didn’t stop it from wagging. “I also like flowers.”

Flowers might be even more dangerous than pillows. Pillows would take up space and eventually fill up a room, but flowers would need replacing constantly. That meant that Rayne was going to be able to continuously buy Hannah flowers. Not only that, but now she had the excuse to take Hannah out to all the flower gardens and exhibits in the capital. Even more excuses to just spend some time outdoors with her in the estate’s gardens when the flowers started to bloom. Hannah might not understand but pillows and flowers were an absolute treasure trove of things for Rayne to work with. “Alright, pillows and flowers it is.”

[To be fully honest I was freaking out about not getting chapters done in time since I was summoned for jury duty. Luckily I got to just sit there waiting and writing for around two hours before the case got dismissed before selection even happened. So the chapter got done and here you go!]