when you need me the most
Added 2024-11-17 00:58:33 +0000 UTCwhen you stop replying to my texts and your roommate lets me know you haven’t come out of your room all day, i know something is wrong. i come over and knock softly on your door. at first, you tell me to go away, your voice muffled and heavy. but the moment you hear it is me, there is a pause, and then you open the door. you look at me, half wanting me to stay, half wanting me to leave. i step inside, and take your hand and guide you back to bed, where we crawl under the covers together. and then you break, your tears spilling out as you admit you do not even know what is wrong, only that something feels off, something you cannot place. i hold you close, my arms wrapped around you, and tell you that it does not matter. all i care about is knowing you are here, and i am here for you, however long you need me.
Comments
I can never get over how kind, compassionate, sweet, loving you are in your audios.🥺🥺💕 Authentically you, yet so positively impactful, so so so helpful to me and countless others. I wish you could come cuddle with me, help me clean up my massively messy room and give me all the forehead kisses. (All the kisses, let’s be honest. haha🥰😍😘😘) I’d be down to go for a drive even though I just got done driving from somewhere. Anything to be with you. 💕❤️🔥
Kay Jay - Celestial Aquamarine 🔮🌙🌌🪐✨️☪️
2025-03-21 03:14:33 +0000 UTCListening to this again. 💙🌧 Having a rough night and just need to distract my mind from every single thought. Good, bad and in between...doesn't matter. Oh how I wish I could turn my brain off for a little bit so I can sleep peacefully. 😮💨😮💨😴🙁
Kay Jay - Celestial Aquamarine 🔮🌙🌌🪐✨️☪️
2025-01-29 08:14:27 +0000 UTC"I will rot with you" - brb, gonna cry
Summer
2024-11-25 04:24:54 +0000 UTCOh noo, my eyes….they’re leaking 🥹
Colleen
2024-11-18 09:13:05 +0000 UTCILY Colleen!!!! So glad to have met you 🫶🏼🫶🏼
Destiny
2024-11-18 06:43:16 +0000 UTCAmen! 🙏 🙌🏻 we love you so very much, bubba!!
Caitlin
2024-11-18 01:21:53 +0000 UTCThanks K <3
Kayla
2024-11-18 00:26:55 +0000 UTCIt didn't work for me on my laptop last night right when he posted it, I had to use the app on my phone to listen. But it fixed itself. Odd. 🤷🏾♀️🤔
Kay Jay - celestial aquamarine🌙🔮🌌
2024-11-17 21:06:01 +0000 UTCThank you for sharing that with me. I'm sorry that Ocotber is hard. It's so hard to lose someone but I have to remind myself that I'm lucky to have loved someone so much that losing them broke my heart
Lilo
2024-11-17 18:33:23 +0000 UTCIt's really gentle and soft !! I think I'll be very sad if you don't do this anymore after a lot of time, but I'm sure I'll be much better thanks to you by then. Thank you. 🐥
Ss
2024-11-17 18:24:07 +0000 UTCYes, kitten, this! 🫶🏻 I understand that people might want to reach out when they’re worried, but also please don’t tell me our friendship is over, when I tell you that I indeed do need to be alone 😬 I guess at the end of the day it all comes down to communication anyway 🫶🏻
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 17:51:23 +0000 UTCMy coping mechanism is to self isolate. I need time alone to process. I find that when I'm ready I will reach out with a text. Even then I might not be verbal but if I reach out it means I want comfort without words. I understand exactly what you are saying that society makes it look like we're in the wrong for wanting to process alone. There's nothing wrong with wanting someone to make the first move when they see us withdraw but don't be surprised if I stick by my request to be left alone.
Kitten🐈⬛
2024-11-17 17:37:41 +0000 UTCWell, you can’t really force it upon people to socialise with you either, that’s why therapy comes into play 😌
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 17:36:32 +0000 UTCJust as long as it’s in a healthy way. It’s not only a “societal” view that it can have a negative impact.
Destiny
2024-11-17 17:26:20 +0000 UTC**meow** 😻
Kitten🐈⬛
2024-11-17 17:22:33 +0000 UTCIt doesn’t have to be a partner, true. My word about coping mechanisms still stands. We should be able to cope alone. A supportive person may be a nice addition to our life, but you don’t have any certainty that they’re always be there, and you have to cope when you’re left to your own devices. It’s also not insane or wrong to seek professional help.
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 17:21:27 +0000 UTCthis meant so much to much to me😭 like i’ve been going through something so similar and this was perfect💛
AllyBoo124
2024-11-17 17:13:46 +0000 UTCIt doesn’t even have to be a romantic relationship. It just has to be the right person. And yes, some of us may never find that person. I think most things are ok in moderation. I use self isolation, so I’m by no means against it. But, it can be a slippery slope. And it can lead to worsening mental health and physical health problems if we are not careful. I could blabber on about it forever, so if anyone wants to trade thoughts, or just talk to someone (I’ve been told I’m a good listener) let me know. I don’t want anyone to ever feel they are truly alone 🫶🏼
Destiny
2024-11-17 17:12:25 +0000 UTClistening to this audio felt like a nice, warm hug that i’ve been needing for a while ❤️🩹🫂 having someone that understands you when you feel so low is so special 🤍✨
madeline
2024-11-17 17:05:28 +0000 UTCI’m just like “please never worry about me, just let me worry about you” 😬🤣
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 16:56:46 +0000 UTC😂🤣😂 that does actually make sense. Like...I will go no contact if I'm going through it but if you do the same I will be worried, so....maybe don't do that babe? 🤣😂
Kay Jay - celestial aquamarine🌙🔮🌌
2024-11-17 16:49:22 +0000 UTCAnd we might never have this person, truth be told. That’s why it’s so important to find healthy coping mechanisms that work for you, when you’re not in a relationship.
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 16:48:40 +0000 UTCI’d be extremely worried but at the same time I wouldn’t like for them to be worried when I go no contact 🤣🤣🤣 Am I making sense? No? Okay 🤣
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 16:45:28 +0000 UTCI don’t think this audio or anyone is saying self isolating is wrong. But obviously this resonates with those of us who tend to self isolate, but in truth would prefer not to. We just don’t have that person that can just be there for us, like portrayed in this audio.
Destiny
2024-11-17 16:44:59 +0000 UTCAnd again, I agree with you on that 100%! Your approach sounds so reasonable and respectful for all parties 🥹 I love the emoji system because it’s not disrespectful or demanding, but still allows you to show that you care 🥹 Lots of love 🫂🖤🖤🖤
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 16:43:40 +0000 UTCOkay yall, now that I'm not in my feelings as much as last night.....I have other thoughts. 🤔🧐 I don't know that I would go days without at least sending a voice text, meme or some kind of contact to a boyfriend. Smoke signal, message in a bottle, something. 🤣💨🍾🌊🕊 Am I losing it? Because if the reverse happened....I would be worried, prob a little upset....🤔👀👀👀 unless that's normal flow of contact for the relationship or someone is extremely busy. I'm not talking 24/7 contact, attached at the hip either. Please tell me what you think, or what you do! 😁💡
Kay Jay - celestial aquamarine🌙🔮🌌
2024-11-17 16:21:31 +0000 UTCGood point. I am both fueled by outward connections and lots of time alone and have a regular balance that works for me. I know some folks who just need only time alone, and that's okay too. Sometimes I will send a "I love and am thinking of you, here for anything you need" message, no pressure for a response back. Just so they know they are loved and missed but I know you need space. Or, if it has been too long, it's "just send an emoji and let me know you are still alive and kicking" text. But that's for the super close ones. 😂😵 we have a agreed upon system. The thing I really love about life is we get to decide the rules! If it works for us, it doesn't matter who it works for. 💪🏾😎
Kay Jay - celestial aquamarine🌙🔮🌌
2024-11-17 16:13:54 +0000 UTCNever, you’re my kitten 🐈⬛🫶🏻
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 16:09:25 +0000 UTCK, if you didn’t know already how loved and appreciated you are by us, then I hope you can read these comments and feel the love that we have for you. Keep being amazing, keep being you. The world is a better place with you in it❤️🌍💫
Aiza
2024-11-17 16:01:56 +0000 UTCThank you! Get out of my head.
Kitten🐈⬛
2024-11-17 16:01:42 +0000 UTCYes yes yes. 😭😭😭😭
Kay Jay - celestial aquamarine🌙🔮🌌
2024-11-17 16:00:12 +0000 UTCAwe!!! 😭😭🥲 big hugs. I'm here for chats, moral support, rants, all the things. ❤
Kay Jay - celestial aquamarine🌙🔮🌌
2024-11-17 15:59:21 +0000 UTCAwe Jess. Big hugs! 🤗🥲 Our kindred spirits are everywhere. That is one of the reasons I put myself out there and share. Life is so much better now that I embrace who I am. I still struggle from time to time but I'm fine with that. As for my family? They do their best. I think. 😂😭 but another thing I've learned is that the effort and energy I put out to them is rarely equally given back. I never expect it, or do things for what I will get back....it's just something hard not to recognize. I normalize it so that I don't feel resentful. I can be super grateful for what they do, make it a bigger positive than it is. It keeps the peace. But I still do ME. I can't help it and won't stop. I love helping people. Loving on them, encouraging, supporting. It comes back to me in other ways. ❤🪄🥳
Kay Jay - celestial aquamarine🌙🔮🌌
2024-11-17 15:58:04 +0000 UTCThank you Destiny! I'm so sorry about your Mom. Caretaking for loved ones can be so hard emotionally and physically, and I'm glad she had you. ❤❤❤
Kay Jay - celestial aquamarine🌙🔮🌌
2024-11-17 15:32:56 +0000 UTCThank you Anna! Ugh, yes😮💨😮💨. So much fun. I nag him regularly, and my Mom as well. I have siblings who help with that too. 🤣😂🥳 yes, take me back to when this wasn't a worry! I'll keep all the other adulting things and do it with no complaints, I swear. 😇 Thank you so much for the kind compliments. 🥰 I like it here so I'm sharing myself with yall, instead of lurking. 😘
Kay Jay - celestial aquamarine🌙🔮🌌
2024-11-17 15:30:36 +0000 UTCAlso in stark contrast to what everyone else is saying, there’s a possibility that somebody needs time alone, and they don’t wanna be forced to talk to people or even socialise with anybody. They’ll reach out to you, when they’re less volatile 😌 Just wanted to point out that if self-isolating works for you, and it’s your coping mechanism, do not stop just because it’s not glorified in the society 🖤🫶🏻
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 15:14:24 +0000 UTC7:11 you can literally feel him giving u a hug like im not kidding 😔
vie
2024-11-17 10:01:19 +0000 UTCWhy can't we all have someone who would rot with us😞 fighting this alone for so many years gets too much. This audio will be on repeat
Anny
2024-11-17 09:32:01 +0000 UTCThank you for this. I have so many words but also no words at all. So just thanks for “getting it” 😢😢😢
Shadow
2024-11-17 07:23:16 +0000 UTCThank you K ❤️
steph fiore
2024-11-17 07:10:01 +0000 UTC“I’ll rot with you”😭✋🏼
Aiza
2024-11-17 06:46:30 +0000 UTCI wish my younger self could listen to this audio and understand that she wasn't alone. 🥺
Kickis
2024-11-17 06:42:19 +0000 UTCGood luck girlie!!
Aiza
2024-11-17 06:32:51 +0000 UTCGood luck!! It’s what I want to do, I just haven’t rolled the ball yet
Aiza
2024-11-17 06:32:43 +0000 UTC“I’ve got your tears” this will always be so precious🥹 “You never ever ever have to apologise, no not for how you feel. Never for how you feel” “Why don’t you want me to see you like this?” K, you help so much, in ways I can’t even begin to describe. Life is always hard and heavy for me but just listening to your comfort audios and knowing that I can come here and feel safe makes it that bit better. Your so soft and gentle with her, you don’t make her feel bad for feeling how she feels and you even suggest going for drive while reminding her that its only if SHE wants to go, no pressure. You’re so caring and so loving, it’s admirable. Thank you for everything K <3
Aiza
2024-11-17 06:32:04 +0000 UTCI love you Destiny 💞🫂 * and anyone else reading this comment <3
Colleen
2024-11-17 05:17:42 +0000 UTCI’m so sorry this is a hard time. October is that month for me. My son would have been 5 years old last month. I know firsthand how hard it is to not have people in your corner who understand what you’ve been through. When it comes to loss, I’m so damn glad when others don’t understand. But it does make for some lonely days, that’s for sure😞
Anna
2024-11-17 05:17:36 +0000 UTCI’m sorry to hear about your dad. I understand how you feel 🫂 My mom had a massive stroke, and I cared for her afterwards because she never regained the functions that she lost. If you ever need to talk about it, let me know.
Destiny
2024-11-17 05:12:47 +0000 UTCHey girl. I’m so happy your dad is okay! But yes, what a scary thing😞 Being grown means that we now worry about our parents instead of them always worrying about us. One part of adulthood I’m not too fond of. Can’t I just go back to a time when I believed my parents to be invincible?!?😫🙃 Anyway, I’ve been seeing your comments here lately and you seem like such a beacon of light ✨ Your dad (and everyone!) is lucky to have you🤗
Anna
2024-11-17 05:09:53 +0000 UTCI absolutely loved this…. I wish it was an hour long😂🤍
C
2024-11-17 05:04:52 +0000 UTC“never ever apologize for how you feel” Thx for this audio K. The hardest part of this kind of situation for me is the guilt, the guilt of sad and crying for no reason, and I’ve been stuck in it for days now. I should be grateful and happy for the life I have, but why can’t I stop feeling like this? There’s nothing for me to feel sad or pressured about. Am I just too ungrateful? This kind of guilt also makes me unable to express it to others or ask for any kind of support or comfort. Because I don’t feel like anyone in my life would get it. And I would be judged if anyone knows about it. Because why wouldn’t they? Even I’m judging myself for feeling like this. I’m really grateful for this audio. Wish I can meet someone like this in the future.
cyh
2024-11-17 05:04:37 +0000 UTC'i will rot with you' as a professional bedrotter, thats a love language for me.
vie
2024-11-17 05:01:19 +0000 UTC🤍
b
2024-11-17 04:54:20 +0000 UTCThank you everyone for sharing. Seeing the comments in this audio is helping me as much as the audio itself. I’m a pro at self isolating, and sometimes it gets so lonely and feels like I am the only one who feels that way (even though I know logically I’m not). It helps me feel like I’m not quite as alone in the world. 🧡 I hope we can all find the support we need, and someone that can make us feel safe and that we are not alone.
Destiny
2024-11-17 04:53:22 +0000 UTCneeded this so bad. I've been down the last month or so, and unfortunately, self isolation is an old friend of mine. I hope we can all be given this much grace and feel safe enough to accept it one day <3
b
2024-11-17 04:50:06 +0000 UTCIt's almost like he knew I got bad news tonight.
Jess
2024-11-17 04:35:43 +0000 UTCYour soft “hiii” that you do in some of the softer parts of videos heals something in me. It’s so gentle 😭 the fact that you CAN be stern but you have this soft pitch that you know we need sometimes 🥺
Anya
2024-11-17 04:15:57 +0000 UTCNgl, this made me fucking cry. I feel it in my heart 😭
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 04:11:26 +0000 UTCIt’s like you know when I need this kind of audio 🥺🤍
Tori
2024-11-17 04:04:53 +0000 UTCI know how you feel. I’m the one that always wants to take care of others. I’m jaded and think that this person doesn’t exist, period 😭
Destiny
2024-11-17 03:44:30 +0000 UTCThat sounds like a dream. I don’t think that person will ever exist for me. I’m normally that person for others.
TheSweetForever
2024-11-17 03:25:14 +0000 UTCThe timing of this audio, is extremely uncanny 🤨. Impeccable timing.
TheSweetForever
2024-11-17 03:24:31 +0000 UTCMan, I teared up reading this. I relate to your feelings so much. It’s so disheartening to work and work towards “normal” and never quite get there because your normal is different than others. But I too embraced it at some point and keep working at it. I’m sure your friends and family are very grateful for the compassion you show them and I hope they give you the same. 🙂
Jess
2024-11-17 03:15:13 +0000 UTCBilla, girl, fear not! It won’t happen! 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🖤
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 03:08:57 +0000 UTC"You've been going through all this alone, I don't want you to go through any of this alone" and the soft "it's ok's" broke me 😢 Just going to crawl into bed and cry into K's virtual lap.
Caitlin
2024-11-17 02:44:10 +0000 UTCIt's unbelievable how K just knows...This is 100% me. Why is it so hard to find someone, anyone, who understands like this? Haven't even listened and I'm already tearing up from the description. I feel like this almost all the time.
Caitlin
2024-11-17 02:27:35 +0000 UTCMine hadn't worked since upload but after deleting & re-downloading the app it works now! Maybe try that?
Sultry 🍓
2024-11-17 02:24:20 +0000 UTCToo bad that K’s not on that page with us 😫🥹😅
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 02:10:20 +0000 UTCAlexa play Killing Me Softly 🎶I felt he'd found my letters and read each one out loud I prayed that he would finish, but he just kept right on strumming my pain with his fingers singing my life with his words🎶
Carrie
2024-11-17 01:52:40 +0000 UTCThat means a lot ♥ I'm so sorry for your loss
Lilo
2024-11-17 01:51:36 +0000 UTCdoesn't work for me :( I've been trying since I commented
flo 🌟
2024-11-17 01:50:02 +0000 UTCSo sorry November is a tough month for you. I just lost my mom, if you ever want to just vent or talk about it, let me know 🫂
Destiny
2024-11-17 01:43:48 +0000 UTC♥ ♥ ♥
Lilo
2024-11-17 01:31:06 +0000 UTCYou don’t know me, but you just described me to a T. I’ve been struggling, and have a hard time articulating it sometimes. The thought of someone just being there, not expecting an explanation, or trying to fix it all is such a comforting thought. Thank you k. 🧡
Destiny
2024-11-17 01:29:26 +0000 UTCThis time of year is rough. Missing my mom and dad. Their birthdays are both in November and would have been 70 and 68. I haven't been able to reach out to anyone irl about it because they don't know how to deal with it. I don't blame them. So I've been living under the comfort tag this month ♥
Lilo
2024-11-17 01:27:17 +0000 UTCAm i the only one having issues trying to play the audio? Edit; works now 🫡
nothing to see here
2024-11-17 01:24:43 +0000 UTCthis is actually insane bc I just got up for the first time all day and I don’t know what’s wrong 😭😭
Liv 🐞
2024-11-17 01:24:18 +0000 UTCSelf isolation is one of the first signs I'm not okay. Spot on. It’s only been me taking care of myself through all of this. I’ve done so much work. I still do a lot of work. On my own, in therapy, with my psychiatrist. After years of so much shame, attempting to bury it and act normal…but I was never normal. I own it now. I bring it out into the light. I normalize it. I speak it casually to the world. Pave the way for others around me to do the same, to never feel the way I felt. I see the impact of my strength and courage with friends and family. Tears run down my face as I listen and type this. I give so much to others, pour into them, check on them, put out so much love into the world. I never want anyone to feel the way I have. The way I do.
Kay Jay - celestial aquamarine🌙🔮🌌
2024-11-17 01:24:14 +0000 UTCI saw ur comment!! im so glad we're on the same page 😭
flo 🌟
2024-11-17 01:21:58 +0000 UTCOh I even commented under the old colouring one, asking for a redo 😫 I’ll request some more for sure! 🤞🏻🥺
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 01:15:45 +0000 UTCsaaame I've requested more playtime types of audios as i LOVED the colouring time one 😔😔
flo 🌟
2024-11-17 01:13:59 +0000 UTC“Why don’t you want me to see you like this?” Because no one ever wants to see me like this. Why would you be any different? From me, who has dealt with chronic depression and anxiety off and mostly on since childhood. Seasonal depression is on the way. Maybe it is here now, not helping my mood and mindset. Attempts not to cry…..trying to just listen and focus on filling in this sky in my sketchbook. Fuck.
Kay Jay - celestial aquamarine🌙🔮🌌
2024-11-17 01:13:39 +0000 UTCMe too! That’s also something I’ve been requesting for 84 years 😫😭
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 01:09:38 +0000 UTComg !! despite it being super tiring, it’s a lot of fun :,)) just a lot to memorize 😪
trina raquel
2024-11-17 01:08:07 +0000 UTC👀 Spy K back at it again with the cameras and spy wear it seems. This is so extremely needed right now. Thank you 😭
Samiosa
2024-11-17 01:07:03 +0000 UTCI NEED MORE DDLG CONTENT IVE DRAINED ALL THE OLD STUFF
flo 🌟
2024-11-17 01:06:51 +0000 UTC<3 I literally just opened Patreon on my laptop. This description has me all in my feels, this has been a hard week. My Dad had a mini stroke, I'm going through it. He is home now and okay, but....big sigh. It was scary, and something we have to focus on and manage to keep him alive. Doesn't help that I lost both grandparents to strokes. All the things feel off. Wrong. I feel so alone, my brain is trying to sabotage me. But we are blessed, have joy, fun, so much love, are safe.
Kay Jay - celestial aquamarine🌙🔮🌌
2024-11-17 01:06:40 +0000 UTCI fear I would not be okay
billa
2024-11-17 01:05:47 +0000 UTCOmg i start mine in February!! Good luck my angel! You got this
billa
2024-11-17 01:05:15 +0000 UTCi just started my flight attendant training this week, and boy it hasn’t been easy. i really needed this. thank u sm k <3
trina raquel
2024-11-17 01:04:27 +0000 UTCoh yeah I’m gonna be using this a lot😭❤️
Gabriela
2024-11-17 01:04:03 +0000 UTCSo next up this, but make it DDlg, am I right or am I right 🧸
unholy babygirl
2024-11-17 01:03:57 +0000 UTCOh no! Sending all the healing vibes your way girly💗
Gabriela
2024-11-17 01:03:29 +0000 UTCNooo this description is going to make me cry. So many nights while working on my Bachelors did I feel this way😭😭
Kalilea
2024-11-17 01:01:59 +0000 UTCToday has been an awful no good day, I’m finally home and I’ve got my blanket and duvet on, time to finally let me tears out and listen to this😭 Thank you K❤️🩹 Quite literally when I need you the most😔 Your descriptions are beautiful, it’s like reading a story. One where I’d like to stay longer.
Aiza
2024-11-17 01:01:40 +0000 UTCOh so I’m gonna be crying tonight? Anything for you kithaniel😭
JC
2024-11-17 01:01:11 +0000 UTCfrom the week i’ve had, i so need this when i get home from work
grey !
2024-11-17 01:01:10 +0000 UTCneeded this kind of comfort for my silly pmt right now ❤️ thank u K
flo 🌟
2024-11-17 01:01:08 +0000 UTCThis but I just got back from a night out resulting in a sprained ankle….
billa
2024-11-17 01:00:49 +0000 UTCPerfect timing😭
Aiza
2024-11-17 00:59:49 +0000 UTC
