Brewing Bad Ch. 124-125

Ch. 124 - Missives and Movements

The following day, Heisenburgle drafted a letter to inform the Prince of their success. He let Lucas read it, and though he didn’t allow him much input into the overweening thing, it did remind him that he should send Danaria something cute later to let her know that he was thinking of her, and that he missed her. 

“Don’t you think transcendental accomplishment is a little much?” Lucas asked. “I feel like it’s laying on what we did a little thick.” 

Though he didn’t mind the praise or even sharing the credit with Heisenburgle, he felt like downplaying things might make him seem less important. To Lucas, that seemed to be the best way to forestall any other attempts on his life. He was especially keen on that part since he hoped to spend a lot more time with Danaria soon, and the very last thing he wanted was for her to be caught in the crossfire. 

The fact of the matter was that he was likely to have a lot more enemies in the near future if he rolled out this version, and that wasn’t even including the elves. One would think that releasing a nonaddictive version of a drug and cleaning the streets of addicts would result in less hostility, but Lucas could think of at least one family that would be eager to settle scores as soon as he let them off the leash. 

“That is only because you do not understand proper alchemy, my boy,” Heisenburgle said, feeling extra chipper. “When one manages to discover one of the fabled Seven Forbidden Potions, what else would you call it but a transcendental accomplishment? We accomplished the impossible. So much so that perhaps the Prince will finally see fit to grant me my fire lab so I can create new marvels.”

“Yeah, yeah, your shiny pony needs fuel. I get it,” Lucas answered dismissively. “But, like, this wasn’t even hard. It’s only barely spring out there. We haven’t even been at this for half a year, and I mean, we haven’t even tested the new stuff, have we?”

The gnome looked at him like he had three heads for a moment. Oh yeah, I’m not supposed to mention the hyperquadwhateverlator, Lucas reminded himself as he braced for the dressing down about secrecy that was sure to follow. It turned out that he was way off. 

“Haven’t tested it? Haven’t tested it? You think I would send word to the Prince of all people about our success if we hadn’t tested it yet? Are you daft?” the gnome repeated himself in a rising, shrill tone. “What do you think I was doing while you were sick in bed. I used nearly the whole batch on a series of blind tests with our little guinea pigs to compare the efficacy to the older Blue that you made previously. There is no doubt. All prisoners lived, and the reported results were nothing short of spectacular!”

The gnome went on for another minute about prisoner feedback, along with a number of subtle and not-so-subtle digs at Lucas’s powers of perception. He might have gone for an hour that way, but Lucas eventually got sick of it and said, “You know what, tell him whatever you want. Just as long as I get to go home like asap.”

“Yes, well, I have told the Prince that you have fulfilled your role in a very satisfactory manner,” the gnome agreed, “And that there is no reason you cannot continue production from your current laboratory, so I do not foresee any reason that he would require your continued presence here unless he continues to fear for your safety.”

“I got my own people at the manor,” Lucas insisted. “No one is going to fuck with me there.”

“Quite,” the gnome agreed. “And while I have enjoyed your, ahem, unorthodox presence, it would be nice to get back to my own personal projects. My starlight solvent, for instance. I think that—”

“I could help you with that, you know. I mean, I’ll be going in a day or two, but if you want to put the work in, we could give it a shot.” Lucas volunteered just to annoy the gnome. “I think with a little alteration, the mirrors I made for moonlight would—”

“That is quite alright,” Heisenburgle interrupted. “In any case, it will likely take days for the Prince to decide on the correct course of action. You are likely to be here for weeks yet.”

Lucas suppressed the sigh that had tried to come out automatically and instead forced himself to shrug. He’d known that deep down, but he didn’t want to give the gnome the satisfaction.

“Okay,” Lucas said, “Well, then I’m going to make some moonlight for the next night or two, so I can make plenty of Lwynthenl when I get out of here since you’ll probably want my mirrors for study.”

He had to suppress a laugh there as Heisenburgle practically chased Lucas out of his office, insisting that if he didn’t take those wretched, awful mirrors, he’d have them broken down for scrap. That is the only part about this place I’m going to miss when I’m gone, Lucas decided. If he had one joy in life besides Danaria, it was spinning up that self-important alchemist. Well, that and the infinite ingredients. It's nice not to have to go find all of this shit myself.

Lucas did just what he promised, and inside an hour, he was back on the roof, aiming all of his mirrors and lenses at the focal point. The moon was setting early tonight, so he doubted he’d even activate the half a dozen vials of solute he’d whipped up in the lab, but even two would be enough to rub in the gnome’s face. 

That night, Lucas made four, but given that he could now watch the temperature of the exothermic reaction rise, it was a lot easier than it had been last time when he was simply guessing at the color of the light the vial emitted. Even though he made several and planned to make several more at moonrise tomorrow, he only tried to empower the first one. 

Purity: 9% mana - Purify up to six reagents. 

Luminescence: 4% mana - Double the brightness of this celestial solvent. 

Power: 18% mana - Increase the potency of whatever potion this reagent is used to craft by 20%

That wasn’t just because it didn’t give him a lot of options, though. It was because he was doing this assembly line style. He appreciated the experience bump from each potion he made, but aside from building a stockpile of this valuable reagent, he really only wanted to make one extra beautiful as a gift for Danaria, and what he got certainly fit the bill. 

When he increased the luminescence of the first one he created, it swelled with light, practically becoming a flashlight compared to the other potions, which were more like glow sticks. It was only when that was done, and he’d put them in a crate that he’d set aside for this purpose, that he went back down to the lab and looked up how to make a celestial solvent from starlight. 

Why did he do that? He wasn’t sure. He just wanted to stick it to Heisenburgle. Lucas didn’t need it or anything, but the fact that he had these achievements now made him want to use it. The recipe wasn’t very complicated. It looked expensive since one of the listed ingredients was ground diamonds, but not complicated. Fortunately, for at least as long as he was here in Blackgate, expensive wasn’t his problem.

Ground Diamonds (fine): Poison -3, intelligence 3, endurance 2, mana regeneration increased by 30% for one hour. 

Since Lucas had nothing better to do, he started whipping up the solvent while the moon set, and then, while he waited for it to cool, he went back to the roof to prepare. The Book he’d read the recipe from made it sound like the light requirements were about double what the lunar solvent was. Rather, it said that they were the same, but they were so dilute that it required more space and a very clear sky. Lucas had the clear sky, but what he needed were more mirrors, so he grabbed a few out of the fourth-floor hallway and angled them off various walls and chimneys until starlight was coming at the focal point of the vial. 

He’d planned to moderate the biggest source of light with the oculus, as he had in the past, but it turned out that was necessary. The potions drank in the light, and the temperature barely twitched. More was absolutely better. 

It took longer than expected, but two hours later, he saw the pop-ups that indicated success and quickly tucked the thing away. He’d expected Heisenburgle to check on him at some point, and while it might be fun for a moment to rub this success in the gnome’s face, he was pretty sure the gnome would murder him in his sleep for it. 

You have created a new potion +58 experience.

You have created Concentrated Starlight.

You have created another of the four Celestial Solvents! 

It’s probably best not to let an egomaniac know that the thing he’s been trying to make for years you made on the very first try, he told himself as he broke everything down and put all the mirrors back in the hallway where he found them. 

For the next week, life went on like this, in simple, predictable rhythms. Most nights, Lucas would make more moonlight as he slowly filled up his padded crate one row at a time. Some nights, Heisenburgle would be there, and some nights, he wouldn’t. While he would always scoff at Lucas’s ‘irreverent’ methods, he eventually stopped arguing with his results. 

On other nights, Lucas would play ingredient tag in the gnome’s shop as he used his pop-ups to guide him to compatible ingredients and made lists of the most interesting combinations that he could try to experiment on later when he was home. He paid special attention to those that involved reagents that weren’t likely to cost a fortune, but it was hard to say. While he was sure blue dragon scales were pricey, he had no idea if powdered hydra tongue or ground griffon claws were more expensive. 

Blue Dragon Scale (scrapings): electrically charged reagent. +50% cold resistance to any potion this is added to. 

Hydra Tongue (powdered): poison 8, endurance -4, acid resistance +33% to any potion this is added to. 

Griffon Claws (ground): Strength 5, poison 3, endurance 2, 10% chance of inducing berserk rage in anyone who imbibes a potion containing this ingredient unless it has first been purified. 

Heisenburgle never bothered to ask why one of his vials of concentrated moonlight was dimmer than the rest, and one was brighter, which was good because Lucas had no idea what he’d tell the gnome. 

Still, all of that came to an end when Lucas met Heisenburgle one evening, and the gnome announced that a letter had arrived for him. “From the Prince?” Lucas asked. “I can finally go?”

“The Prince has sent you a letter too,” he said with a smile, but I was speaking of them one,” he said, handing Lucas a red envelope with decidedly feminine handwriting. “You are free to read them at your leisure, but I will not send a response to either of them without my consultation. Is that understood?”

Lucas nodded numbly as he looked at the red sealed envelope like the viper it was. He absolutely did not want to open the thing and find out what was inside, but he very much doubted that he had a choice. 

Ch. 125 - The Other Shoe

Lucas returned to his room with both notes and for once, in an uncharacteristic fit of paranoia, he swept the place with his hands and a swing pillow to make sure there were no invisible spies. He’d seen those footprints on the roof, and he had a way of turning invisible himself, so he knew that they were real, but somehow he was still skeptical of their existence. 

Still, today, he was a believer, and he had a feeling today that he didn’t want anyone else reading over his shoulder. He got that way whenever Machiavelli was around, and the Prince combined with his least favorite party girl, well, that just put his teeth on edge. 

He broke the red wax seal on the Prince’s letter first and quickly skimmed it. It seemed to be a congratulatory letter, more than anything, which made him relax a little. 

‘My dear Lucas, after being updated by Heisenburgle, I am most pleased with your progress. Please allow me to extend my formal congratulations on a job well done,” the letter started, which was promising. “Our client, who will remain nameless, sampled the small amount that arrived with Hisenburgles last letter and is equally satisfied with your hard work, though she has opted to send her own congratulations in a separate letter, which should also already be in your possession.’

Lucas looked back at the red envelope with the gold writing and wondered if that was what the Prince was buttering him up for with all the praise or if there was something else in this letter he should fear. Only one way to find out, he told himself as he kept reading.

‘Our good alchemist tells me that your contributions have been vital and freely given and that you desire to return to your own operations. , so I will allow after you have delivered to the crown 100 doses of Lwynthenl, and an agreement for 20 a month going forward,’ 

That’s a lot of Blue, even for a dragon, Lucas thought, but it wasn’t exactly going to break the bank. It was essentially 500 golden dragons and an additional 100 gold dragons a month, which was a fortune by anyone's measure, but it wouldn’t even cost him half a dragon in ingredients or more than a few hours of time, so it hardly seemed like a big deal. That changed as he kept reading. 

‘Additionally, I am prepared to offer you a royal pardon for all crimes to date, along with a monopoly on the production of your drugs as long as several conditions are met. The first is that you must keep violence to an appropriate minimum; any serious outbreaks of unrest traced back to your organization will nullify this. The second is that you must pay 1000 dragons in back taxes within the season. Once that is done, you and house Parin shall be forgiven in all things, and your tax burden shall be limited to twenty percent of all net proceeds going forward.’

“Ughh,” Lucas groaned, doing the math in his head. “Kar’gandin is going to kill me.” Whatever savings they were going to get by booting Adin was practically wiped out by this agreement, but then, they’d already expected that. Legal immunity from the guards and the guilds would also help, but he couldn’t help but think that he liked the old arrangement better. 

Still, it was better than he’d hoped for. Getting shaken down for money was a lot better than being given some ridiculous new assignment. He was tempted to counter and argue that 100 golden dragons a month toward the keep-the-dragon-happy-fund was more than enough to do his part, but even though he was the only person who could reliably make the stuff, he still doubted that the cold-blooded Prince would see that as enough leverage to give Lucas much wiggle room. 

We’ll see if the dwarf has any ideas, Lucas sighed as he stared at the second letter.

The Prince’s missive had been very formal, with fancy calligraphy and the seal of Lordanin. Skylara’s seemed more like a love letter. It was written with gold ink on red paper that matched every dress he’d ever seen her in, and very likely her scales, though he hoped never to see those. 

Her seal was a graven image of her own face pressed into golden wax, which made him laugh a little. If you’re basically immortal, I guess that makes sense as a symbol, he told himself, but it might be the most egotistical thing I’ve ever seen. 

With a smile on his face, he opened the letter, but his expression quickly dropped as he read it. ‘My dearest Mister Blue, I am told that after so much hard work, you have finally succeeded in the task that has been set before you, and somehow, in less than a year, you managed to succeed. You truly are an alchemical genius,’ the letter opened, and truthfully, the praise was nice, even if it was really just a junkie telling her dealer that she couldn’t get enough of the new batch. ‘In two weeks, I will be back in Lordanin for another dance. Join me there to make the evening less insufferable, and I will gladly reward you with another night of indescribable passion, just as we had last time. Truthfully, I might simply bring you back to my Château, or even my lair itself, for a week or two. Though it's immodest of me to say this, there is truly nothing like making love while lying on one’s horde. Perhaps this achievement is worthy of sharing that most intimate of experiences with you, despite your humble origins.’

She signed the thing. ‘Do not keep me waiting, my genius. With your potions, we will only soar to ever greater heights together until we reach divinity itself.’

When Lucas was finished reading, he could only shake his head. “I should have tried to let her down easy,” he told himself. “No matter what the Prince said about obeying her, I definitely shouldn’t have let her think we had a wild, sexy evening together.”

Milfy titty monster or not, the very last thing he wanted was to spend a week or two banging a junkie. Even if Danaria wasn’t in the picture, that would still be true, though he admitted to himself that if he was single, he might have just bitten the bullet and done it for business and whatever. Lord knew he’d done worse things. Still, with the idea that he was going to propose to someone in the near future, such a lesion was entirely out of the question. 

“But how in the fuck do I tell her that without getting my head ripped off?” he asked himself as he rubbed his eyes. Most of the time, statements like that were metaphorical, but in this case, they were absolutely literal. Getting murdered for telling her no was a real possibility if Heisenburgle and the Prince were to be believed. 

“It might even be the best-case scenario,” he said as he rubbed his head and tried to figure out how an egotistical dragon would react when scorned. 

Lucas tried to think of some clever plan to get out of this, but even after several minutes of beating his head against the wall, nothing came to him. He couldn’t even pull the same trick he did last time. At least, he was pretty sure he couldn’t. Lwynthenl might be more euphoric than his best batch of Blue had been, but he was pretty sure it was a lot gentler on the body, too. So, she might need a hundred doses of the new stuff. 

That at least gave him an idea. Maybe I could use some Empowered Alchemy to give her a hot shot, he thought to himself. If he juiced every one of the reagents and then juiced the final product, then it should be theoretically possible to brew something as powerful as it was toxic. He didn’t want to kill her, though. The kingdom and the city needed her continued goodwill. He just wished that didn’t involve his dick. 

Reluctantly, he finally rejoined Heisenburgle after half an hour of consideration and told him the bad news, but he didn’t see it that way at all. “What do you mean?” the gnome insisted. “You’re on the good side of three of the top five powers that be now. It's hard to be better positioned for your future endeavors than that.” 

Lucas smiled as he realized the gnome thought he was one of the most important people in the country. He was tempted to ask who the other two were but decided against it. Instead, he tried to explain how this sort of entanglement was the last thing he wanted, while Heisenburgle tried to explain to him that it was a good thing. 

It was a frustrating conversation that accomplished nothing, and eventually, he decided to make another batch or two of Lwynthenl. He owed the Prince three or so to get out of here, and after that, he’d have to keep paying him one batch a quarter or so. The sooner he accomplished that, the sooner he could get the hell out of here and get on with his life. 

When the sun rose, he went to breakfast with Heisenburgle with two batches under his belt. Before he went to bed that morning, he wrote a letter to the Prince, thanking him for his kind offer. He told him that he had some questions before he could fully agree to the proposed deal but that he agreed in principle and would start on the requested Lwynthenl reserve immediately. 

The letter to Skylara was an afterthought, but he was fairly certain if he did not respond to both of them, she would treat it as a snub. How could she see it any other way when she used her own face as a seal? He wondered.  

In that letter, he thanked the dragon for her praise and told her that he was looking forward to seeing her. He also mentioned that he was still working to perfect his recipe in an attempt to lay the groundwork for future excuse-making, but that still felt weak to him, and he was sure he’d have to figure out a better lie than that if he didn’t want to spend a week getting high and banging her. 

After that, he considered writing one to Danaria to let her know he’d be coming home soon, but he didn’t want to pollute the thought of writing the woman he cared for with the woman he didn’t, so he decided against it. “I’ll surprise her,” he told himself. “She’ll like that.”

When he woke the following evening, he finished cooking up the batches of Lwynthenl that he promised the Prince that he would, and he delivered both letters to Heisenburgle so he could review them. After that, He spent the rest of the day packing, and when he went to Heisenburgle’s office to tell him that he’d be ready for a carriage first thing in the morning, the gnome looked genuinely sorry to see him go. 

“Well, should you require consultation on any future projects, my door is always open to you, Lucas,” the gnome said sincerely before shaking his hand in a very exaggerated fashion. 

That surprised Lucas quite a bit. In fact, he would have bet money that the goodbye would have been entirely dismissive. However, he thought about that moment for the rest of the evening. Even after he passed the evening in a relaxed manner, reading a few of the gnome’s books one last time until dawn arrived, and they could start after he’d loaded up the carriage with his effects, he kept coming back to Heisenburgle’s sad look. It wasn’t until they actually set off that Lucas finally understood. At least, he thought he did. 

The gnome’s here with no one but his obsessions to keep him company, he realized. Sounds fucking miserable. Lucas might not have anyone he could talk to about alchemy at home either, but he had tons of people he could talk to about drugs or healing potions, and even if the dwarf and the half-orc that had become his business partners weren’t exactly what he’d call friends most of the time, it beat the hell out of whatever this was.