Eight by Eight

“Looks like we’re on babysitting duty,” Cordelia groused, casting an ungrateful look at Peter.

“Would you rather be with the podcast listeners, working out how to get him back to his dimension?” Faith retorted. “Besides, you’re useless anyway. I’m the one who kicks vampire ass.”

“Too bad you can’t look any good doing it,” Cordelia said. “Newsflash: dressing to give every guy in a five-mile radius a hard-on isn’t very feminist. Get woke.”

“You want me to get woke? The only time you’ve spoken to a Mexican is to tell them you don’t tip for room service.”

Peter watched them go back and forth, the fur flying as hard as it did when Mary Jane and Felicia got into the same room. No matter the universe, some things never changed. He imagined them starting to slap each other—rip one another’s clothes—pull their hair—and his cock got hard. For some reason, interdimensional travel always left him horny.

If he were alone with either of them, he’d try to fuck her. They were both drop-dead gorgeous. Dusky-skinned, flowing dark hair, curvy physiques. Cordelia had large, full breasts that called out to him as hard as Felicia’s ever had, while Faith’s lithe, slender body demanded to be bent over something, the taut muscle evident in her flesh tested to its limit.

But with the two of them there, cock-blocking each other, it was hopeless. Still, he couldn’t help wondering what it would be like to referee that catfight they seemed to be on the brink of.

“You’re lucky we have company,” Faith said. “Otherwise I’d bounce you out of here on your skinny ass.”

“Yeah, you’re a great hostess,” Cordelia said sarcastically. “You’re always the one who goes refill the bucket from the ice machine. In your hotel which rents by the hour.”

Faith gritted her teeth and clearly considered how Cordelia would fare as an organ donor.

On second thought, if Faith really did pack as much of a punch as Peter’d seen Buffy use, letting them come to blows would end with Cordelia missing a head. That would take care of the three’s-a-crowd issue, but wouldn’t do anything to give the place a romantic atmosphere.

“Ladies, hey, whoa!” Peter said, speaking up before they could use the fists knotted at their sides. “You know, I am from another dimension. Don’t you want to ask me any questions? Maybe in my universe, we know who killed JFK or something.”

“Do you?” Cordelia asked, her disdain sweeping from Faith to him without change.

“No… do you?”

“You’re the one who brought it up!”

“We have a spy agency,” Peter reasoned. “Everyone in cool catsuits, they get around in a flying aircraft carrier.”

“My own life has enough sci-fi in it,” Cordelia said. “And especially people who like sci-fi.”

“Yeah, I haven’t figured out all the demons we have here,” Faith said, slightly more commiseratingly. “Don’t wanna start in on your universe.”

“What about movies?” Peter asked. “Maybe in my universe, a movie got made that you never even heard of. Like an Alien 3 that didn’t blow or a Superman movie with a good Lex Luthor.”

“Kay, little dude, I’ll bite. What’s a good movie we don’t have over here?” Faith asked, arms crossed.

“Have you seen Ghost Girl? That’s a good one. Pretty hot stuff.”

“What’s it about?” Cordelia asked, interested. As a side effect of her obsession with actresses and models, she’d picked up a slight appreciation of cinema. 

“This guy moves into an old house that’s haunted,” Peter started. “But the ghost is a woman and she takes a liking to him. They become friends and the ghost helps him score with chicks, because she knows so much more about women than he does.”

Faith smirked. “Guess I’d do the same thing if I was a ghost. Might as well have someone getting laid if I can’t do it.”

“That’s not hot,” Cordelia objected. “It’s just… weird.”

Peter pressed on: “The ghost helps him catch this living girl who’s into kinky stuff, so one time when they’re in bed, the ghost gets into her head and she sort of gets fucked by the guy while he’s fucking the girl. Now both of them are in love with the guy, but the girl doesn’t want to miss getting fucked because she’s possessed. Luckily, she’s a witch, so she casts this spell to give the ghost a body. But since the ghost used to watch them bang, now she wants to watch the guy and the ghost do it. So all three of them are in the bedroom…”

“Do things get a little Three’s Company?” Faith asked, smiling, a twinkle in her eye.

“Yeah,” Peter said. “They do.”

“And they showed this in theaters?” Cordelia demanded, wearing a sly expression similar to Faith’s despite her disparaging tone.

“Yeah,” Peter insisted. “It was very tasteful.”

“Well, if they let you go out in public wearing that skintight gimp suit of yours, I suppose everyone in your universe must be perverts.”

Faith snickered. “You think his costume’s sexy?” she teased Cordelia.

“No!” Cordelia yelped. “It’s just it’s skintight and he’s… and it bulges…”

“I like it,” Faith said. “I think it’s sexy.”

Peter’s heart beat wildly. It was starting to look like he had a chance with the two of them after all. And without any foxy boxing either.

The three of them looked at each other. Peter was no slouch when it came to having a motormouth, but he was saying nothing. That seemed no less a momentous occasion for the two women either. The atmosphere in the room was boiling, but Peter knew it could cool off quick if he didn’t push things to a head.

“If you don’t like bulges, Cordelia…” He pulled down his zipper.

Both sets of female eyes were riveted to the quivering, jerking member that was released from his crotch. It was a blaring red with a purple knob that seemed to cry out for them to spread, bend, suck—take.

Peter’s blood pounded in his ears. They weren’t looking away. Was that good or bad? Now Faith and Cordelia glanced at each other, their gazes meeting, their eyebrows raising and lowering, their lips curling in silent communication. Peter felt like a man facing a jury. He couldn’t sit still. He came to his feet and his movement startled the girls into looking at his cock once more. Cordelia shook her head as if she couldn’t believe its size, even with a second look.

“Heh,” Faith said softly. “Cordy couldn’t take a cock like that, so I might as well.”

Peter’s brain electrified. He felt like he was having an aneurysm. Please, God, kill me after I bang one of them. Just let me bang one…

“If you’re going to fuck him, I might as well fuck him too.” Cordelia smiled adoringly at Peter. “Can’t have a guy with a dick like that get scared away from women.”

“Cordy, where’s the bedroom?” Faith asked. “I am the only person in Sunnydale who doesn’t know.”

“You’ve been missing out,” Cordelia retorted simply and they followed her to her room. 

Peter sat on the bed and they sat down to either side of him. Peter turned to look at Cordelia, but immediately felt fingers rustling through his pubic hair. He turned to Faith to find her eyes captivating his, as her hand made slow, expert strokes on his prick, massaging precum out of his cockhead in massive quantities. Then she put her other hand on his cock, smirking smugly at Cordelia as the cheerleader was left with nothing to hold. Peter may have been big, but two hands were enough to grip all of his length.

“Too slow,” Faith said into Peter’s ear, but mainly to Cordelia. 

“Guess you have more experience being fast than me,” Cordelia replied, fitfully crossing her arms.

With both hands wrapped around Peter’s member, Faith slowly moved them up to the very tip and halfway point of his shaft. He felt his manhood strain and quiver with its rigidness and wondered if Faith was pissed enough to make him come just to deny Cordelia a shot at him.

Faith’s breath was warm and stimulating as it trickled down Peter’s neck. “How’s this feel, daddy longlegs?”

Faith moved back down to the base, then held it in a stranglehold while her other hand moved to the delicate tip of his cockhead, playing with his sensitive foreskin as Peter moaned in pleasure.

“And how’s this feel?” Cordelia asked before her mouth met his in a passionate kiss. Her tongue flashed into his mouth, frolicking with his, slipping and sliding over his lips before returning to the juicy playground of his mouth. Cordelia felt Peter moan into the kiss and a thrill coursed through her body as she realized that’d had nothing to do with Faith and her tawdry handjob.

Let Faith fondle his cock. She was a whore, Cordelia was elegant and refined. She could get far more kicks above the waist than Faith ever could with her loose snatch. Cordelia’s lips left Peter’s swollen and she licked down his jawline, tasting the salty tang of sweat dripping down his face. There’d be a lot more of that before she was done…