2 Broke Girls, 1 Bad Boy

“Pay attention, this is really important,” Walter said.

He was telling them all about endurance swimming and he started out by listing how many land mammals, besides humans, could swim. Faced with fires or other disasters, many could swim adequately with no experience in the water. Sea mammals were better at it, of course. Whales could swim for thousands of miles. Seals could go at five miles an hour, but reached up to twenty miles per hour when chasing their prey. Porpoises had been known to keep up with modern boats, while a giant sea turtle had been clocked at twenty-two miles per hour. Penguins could manage ten miles an hour, but could sprint to thirty. And some had been found more than a thousand miles from land.

That was Caroline’s date.

Max’s date was Fitz. Caroline tried not to be jealous of Max, because God knew they were both dirt poor, but God. He wasn’t even dressed up too nice—not that anything would be too nice for this cheap barbecue joint where the napkins were old newspapers—but he just looked good. His body was lean, taut, knots of muscle showing along his shoulders and arms when his oversized jacket slipped aside and showed some of the bronzed skin that his tanktop revealed. His dark tan ran without a break from his wiry hair to the holes in his old jeans.

Max was having a hell of a time sitting next to him, practically in his lap. As he listened without listening to Walter, he whispered in Max’s ear occasionally. She blushed ferociously. Caroline hadn’t known she was even capable of blushing.

What’s worse, one time, Max whispered something to him and then he whispered something back and, Caroline swore, it was like Max was having an orgasm. Her eyes vacant, her lips working soundlessly. She hadn’t really come, obviously, but it was like he’d put a scenario in her head so dirty that there was this sucking void of pure want that Max just had to process.

It was so fucking enthralling, such a break from Walter’s bullshit, that Caroline paid more attention to Max’s date than to her own. She didn’t want to eye him, she just did. And no matter how much she told herself that Max would no doubt overshare about everything the minute he’d left, Caroline couldn’t wait that long; she peeked at Fitz’s cock, trying to gauge how hung he was. His jeans were just tight enough, and his prick just big enough, that she thought she could about tell. Only he wasn’t hard. She wanted to tell Max to stop being lazy and start throwing herself at him, get him hot, let her see if he had a bunker-buster.

Thank God, Caroline had to pee. She excused herself and went to the ladies’ room, taking the time to force herself out of this head-trip she was on. She wasn’t going to have a whole jealous thing with Max and she wasn’t going to ignore her date tonight. She would be polite, pay attention to him, and if they kept not clicking, they never had to see each other again after tonight.

Congratulating herself on her new mindfulness, Caroline went to the sink to wash up. She scrubbed her hands, then patted her face with moist palms, before working herself over with paper towels.

She did have Fitz to thank for picking this place out. It wasn’t a total dump: the food was good and cheap. And if it was low-rent, at least it was clean. She’d been in way worse bathrooms being dragged along by Max. This one needed a new mirror, because the one above the tap was cracked to the point of—

Someone was behind her.

Caroline whirled around, only to see Fitz. She gasped in relief. At least it was someone she knew and not some immigrant from Rapeistan.

“Oh, Fitz, it’s only you.” Then suspicion quirked her body’s glee at being alone with him. “What are you doing in here?”

Then she felt guilty for asking, like she was accusing him of something, when it was probably only that the men’s room was out of commission. Wait, was it? She’d passed it on the way into the ladies’, but she hadn’t noticed… not that she’d been paying attention… there’d been a moment when Fitz had shifted in his seat and his jeans had ridden low on his hips and she’d caught a glimpse of the dark coils of pubic hair hugging that boy triangle pelvis thing they had…

“I’ve got a problem,” Fitz said.

“Oh. I’m sorry.” Caroline flushed and tried to hide it, her ears burning—how could she still be thinking about sex, and sex with someone she wasn’t on a date with, when Fitz was… what was he doing, besides getting closer to her, his thickly muscled body looming over her small, slender one.

“It’s Max, you know? She’s great: smart, funny, super-hot…”

“Yeah,” Caroline nodded, with a sinking feeling. Of course. Max. And those fucking enormous, ridiculous tits that were like catnip for guys. Even Caroline had to stare sometimes, just marveling that there was so much of them. It was so unfair that Max got to be so pretty, with such a nice body, and then she got those massive naturals on top of being a total babe.

“She’s pretty frisky, you know? I feel like a teenager again, you know? Like all I can think about is getting her into the backseat of my dad’s car and necking with her. She’s been reaching her hand into my pocket and rubbing the condom I have there between her fingers, s’crazy.”

“Yeah,” Caroline said again, trying not to get lost in thoughts of Max and Fitz together. They were both so hot, it’d be like a Marvel movie seeing them go at it. They should make out at the cupcake shop while Caroline charged admission.

“I’m just afraid that she’s got me so hot I won’t last a minute once we finally get down to business. The perfect end to a perfect day, right? I finally meet someone as great as Max and then I make her think I’m a minuteman.”

Caroline jerked out of her weird girl-mix of self-pity and arousal. She loved Max enough that she at least wanted her to have really great sex while all her hopes and dreams were coming true and Caroline was developing Lou Gehrig’s Disease.

“No, Max isn’t like that at all, she won’t think less of you—she has really low standards, honestly.”

“I still think I should do something to take the edge off beforehand.”

“Okay, but how are you going to do that in the ladies…”

Fitz leaned in and kissed her. Caroline’s reaction time was way down from all the beers she’d had to lubricate the evening—she did nothing to take her face out of Fitz’s range. She felt his warm, soft lips pressing aggressively to hers, then his hot tongue snaking into her mouth. Caroline knew she should stop this, right now, before it even started and really began feeling good… but it already felt so good. She was overcome with such dizzy horniness that she was paralyzed. She trilled, a little lust and a little fright.

Fitz’s tongue sampled her throat. She tried to push away, but if there was any fighting the big brute, she couldn’t summon up the strength to do it. Fitz embraced her and kissed her for as long as he wanted to; that was a long time indeed.

She knew it was pointless to fight, but she had to fight, for Max if not for herself. Her bestie would never forgive her for stealing her man like this, even if it was an inside job, the way Fitz was making her heart pound and her cunt hot and all of her swollen and sweaty and throbbing like she was having sex already, like she needed his penis inside her just to catch up with what her body was doing!

But she loved Max! How could she love Max, her sister, and yet do this to her, cuck her? She didn’t know. All Caroline knew was that if she didn’t get away from Fitz, she was going to do something with him that she’d regret for the rest of her life.

And she needed to get away now, because she had one foot on the regret train and it was about to leave the station. The crotch of her panties was soaked and Caroline ached to take them off, take everything off, so that Fitz could have all of her. Total surrender.

At last Fitz stopped for breath. Caroline thrust her head back, away from him, and was shocked by how her face burnt. She could’ve been on fire from how flushed she was.

“Fitz, what the fuck?” she gasped. “I thought you were Max’s boyfriend—she really likes you!”

“Don’t worry,” Fitz grinned. “I’m going to fuck her too. Right now, let’s worry about you. I know you need sex. The fact that you’d even consider a jerkoff like Walter confirms it. I even said so to Max. She agrees with me: you need to get fucked as soon as possible. So let’s help each other out, Caroline. And then I’ll go ball Max all night. You think she’ll care about you having one little orgasm after she’s had seven?”