This Venerable Demon Is Grossly Unqualified

BBnB - B2 Chapter 15

Li Xun was not a man who frequently attended formal banquets.

This was not truly by his own choice. He hated the format of course. Being placed next to an arbitrary pair of his fellow daoists, or senior members of the gentry, rarely yielded conversations worth the breath expended. And that was making the optimistic assumption that lesser g...

BBnB - B2 Chapter 14

Orange-crest sat alone in the shade of his favorite willow, watching dusk overtake the day. His toes were half submerged in the cool water of the fishing pool. Every so often, a particularly brave fish would dart forward, mistaking them for especially ugly worms, and discover what monkeys tasted like.

Bad apparently, from the way they reco...

BBnB - B2 Chapter 13

Orange-crest did not pass out after defeating Yang Wei.

But it was a close thing. He was already sitting when his master arrived. He didn't quite remember when that happened. Maybe when Yang Wei's uncle had descended and it'd gotten hard to breathe for a few moments?

That man was scary. He felt like the king. Heavier than life itself...

BBnB - B2 Chapter 12

The centipede wine hit like Daoist Enduring Oath.

Unfortunately, so did Yang Wei.

Orange-crest's head swam as he slid backward beneath the weight of Yang Wei's charge, stone cracking in the wake of his passage. His staff, once Yang Wei's, bent overhead beneath the weight of Yang Wei's strike. The spearhead stopped just above his head...

BBnB - B2 Chapter 11

Note: This says chapter 11 again. It is the next chapter, what would have been 13. Since I'm moving the FG stuff later, closer to when it becomes relevant to orange-crest, chapters have been reordered.

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"You have the eyes of a tiger."

He really did. Ora...

BBnB - B2 Chapter 10

NOTE: 2 chapters this week, make sure to read 11 first!
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"Another drink, Marshal Yang?"

"Of course, Elder Xun." Yang Shui said, holding out his cup. Elder Xun poured almost absentmindedly, his eyes never leaving the duels taking place beneath t...

BBnB -B2 Chapter 9

Orange-crest was supposed to be asleep. Dark had long since fallen. There were only five more nights until his duel with Yang Wei.

He was having lots of sleepless nights lately, despite Daoist Scouring Medicine's continual exhortations that he should rest well to recover from the exertions of the day. His master insisted that though a trul...

BBnB - B2 Chapter 8

"It turned into stone." Outer Disciple Ma Bojing repeated. "Effortlessly turned multiple blows from a magical weapon that is clearly beyond Wu Yingjie's own level of cultivation. How do you not see how impressive that is? Most daoists cannot perform such techniques. None of us could hope to. Elemental transformations are considered to be an art ...

BBnB - B2 Chapter 7

Double post this week. Make sure you read Chapter 8 first.

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Wu Yingjie was not what orange-crest expected.

The initiate was big, whether by the standards of man or monkey. His limbs lacked the colossal muscles that Daoist Enduring Oath bore, but they were still quite large. Just not as large a...

BBnB - B2 Chapter 6

Orange-crest was exploring himself. Or, he was exploring the mountain? He wasn't exactly sure which statement was more true.

Cultivation was mysterious like that.

The monkey had found a spot beneath a tree he rather liked and sat down in the tall grass that tickled its roots. He'd tried sitting as his master taught at first, back str...

BBnB - B2 Chapter 5

Author Note: I reorganized the chapter order a little. Ya'll were right, it was a rather abrupt transition to the Hao/formless-gleam chapters. This guy will come before the previous 5/6 in the final version, those are now 6/7, and the next chapter will be 8.

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A Portrait of Loss - Chapter 3

I stared down, wondering where to begin.

Not where to end. I had a clear vision of what I sought to accomplish. But the challenge was ever in that translation, from celestial perfection to the movements of the mortal brush.

Those first few strokes were always the most difficult. Sometimes one painted over them entirely, the bones of ...

A Portrait of Loss - Chapter 2

There's an old joke among Clairmorne's Artists.

How can you tell if a man is a musician?

He'll offer to play for you. If his instrument isn't a piano, he probably carried it with him to the cafe anyway.

How do you know if a man is a writer?

He'll tell you. Regale you with snippets from the novel he never seems to finish.<...

A Portrait of Loss - Chapter 1

Book 1 - A Portrait of Loss

Clairmorne. The crown jewel of Riveaux. The city of a thousand luminaries. Some say it is the center of the world. Others do not feel the need to state the obvious.

The city's luminaries speak unity into being, and write glorious new futures for those bold enough to reach for a new age. It's Artists stand ...

BBnB - B2 Chapter ?+1

Note: This chapter currently does not have a fixed number, because I am reorganizing the ordering for better flow and don't yet know where it will go. It is probably receiving some edits, but is canon. It'll probably eventually end up somewhere in the 20s of book 2. It follows directly after 2025-06-15 22:14:52 +0000 UTC View Post

BBnB - B2 Chapter ?

Note: This chapter currently does not have a fixed number, because I am reorganizing the ordering for better flow and don't yet know where it will go. It is probably receiving some edits, but is canon. It'll probably eventually end up somewhere in the 20s of book 2. It is the chapter before 2025-06-08 18:37:21 +0000 UTC View Post

BBnB - B2 Chapter 4

"Young Master Yang, if I could have a moment-"

Li Shuwen's steps were like a river returning to the sea. He interposed himself between Yang Wei and the shameless outer disciple with effortless grace. His steps slowed just the slightest measure, allowing Yang Wei to disentangle himself without ever truly reacting.

"Disciple Yang has h...

B2 Chapter 3

Orange-crest couldn't sleep.

It was such a stupid problem, not being able to sleep. Sleep was what you did when you weren't able to be awake. So how could a monkey be unable to sleep? It was like saying you were unable to not eat. Or, was it like that? That would make eating being awake? Did it make sense to say that you couldn't not eat b...

BBnB - B2 Chapter 2

Orange-crest was getting tired of sneaking around. It was good then, that today was the day his solitude ended.

There was nothing wrong with stealth. It was a useful way for preserving one's life. But it wasn't a healthy way to live, creeping about beneath the notice of all things. Not that it was really possible to hide so completely on t...

BBnB - B2 - Chapter 1

Yang Wei spun, stepping to the side as he did. A thick shaft of hardwood missed his side by a finger's width. His own staff spun round, twirling in it's own spiral. He almost absent-mindedly rapped Wu Yingjie's fingers. With the momentum of two spins, he needed exert neither qi nor muscle for his own staff to land with devastating effect.

...

BBnB - B1 - Epilogue

NOTE: THERE ARE TWO CHAPTERS TODAY. IF YOU HAVEN'T READ CHAPTER 37 YET, DO THAT FIRST.

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The cultivators of the Azure Mountain sect had a thousand theories about what lay beneath their home.

Even the initiates knew that...

BBnB - B1 Chapter 37

Daoist Enduring Oath stared into the flames.

It was a curious thing, his Mountain-Devouring Flame. Old Xiang had suggested he take it from the Treasure Pavilion, after he'd been granted the right to enter for his work on behalf of the Punishment Hall. Elder Asura's Chains had been so pleased to find a disciple willing to devote years to fo...

BBnB - B1 Chapter 36

"You're alive." Li Xun repeated for the third time. As if his words might make the truth more firm.

"Yes." Orange-crest agreed. "And you're not dying."

"We're all dying. But I'm no closer than I was the last time you saw me."

"And last I saw you was two seasons ago."

"Just over six months, yes. Summer is already giving wa...

BBnB - B1 Chapter 35

Daoist Scouring Medicine rose, stretching, and wondered when it had all changed. When a life he'd considered unacceptable had become almost tolerable.

He slept almost every night these days. Spending twelve hours a day performing material refinements without a diet of pills left a man bone-tired. Fully exhausting one's qi was not the same ...

BBnB - B1 Chapter 34

Daoist Scouring Medicine blinked. It was already oily.

Oh. He'd already done this section, hadn't he?

He ran a finger along the stone fur, slicked with unguent. It was strange in texture. Unlike anything the daoist had ever encountered in his century of life. Disciple Zhang and Daoist Enduring Oath both had skin like stone. It was no...

BBnB - B1 Chapter 33

Orange-crest awoke in darkness.

He blinked, noting how very little it changed what he saw. That should not be surprising. He usually woke in darkness. Night was long in the depths of winter. Only the most slovenly monkeys did not either wake before or retire after the sun. Orange-crest usually did both!

But even in winter, the darkne...

BBnB - B1 Chapter 32

"It is not your fault."

Daoist Enduring Oath regretted the words the moment he spoke them. A thoughtless kindness could be its own sort of cruelty.

Daoist Scouring Medicine turned to his closest friend. His face was a placid mask, without a shadow of tension.

"You think Li Hou did this to himself then?" He asked quietly, venom...

BBnB - B1 Chapter 31

Orange-crest sat in the center of a storm, eyes sharp with focus. Power surged within him, qi burning away at a furious pace. Well, it was a storm in much the same way that a trickle of water winding its way down the side of a rock face was a river. That is to say, there was technically wind.

"Come to me." The monkey whispered in the true ...

BBnB - B1 Chapter 30

It was finally ready. Perhaps finally was the wrong word. One month was fast for wine. It was also slow. Wine was fun like that, with many secrets and nuances.

Green worms worked slowly. On Mount Yuelu, he would usually leave his green worm batches for an entire season. Orange-crest had not made a habit of checking in at any regular interv...

B1 Chapter 29

During the winter, orange-crest did not often attend the beginner quarterstaff classes. Not for fear of his fellows, nor deficit of energy. When he neglected to attend Disciple Chang's lessons, he usually found other ways to exercise his body. Ice-fishing was good on the Azure Mountain, likely due to the lack of competition. Some days his brothe...